I have a very abusive background and struggled quietly for years. An incident about 5 years ago ripped the plaster off and I couldn't cope any longer on my own. I was diagnosed with CPTSD by a psychiatrist and a clinical psychologist at the local hospital. Then my non-abusive parent became extremely seriously ill, 300 miles away from my home. Due to surgical procedures and hospital stays, I was unable to access PTSD pathway treatment and was discharged with recommendation to get a referral when things had calmed down a little.
Was referred to the Primary Care Mental Health Worker at the GP's surgery. Today was my 2nd appt. Last week, she made me feel very judged. She made comments about my appearance and that my hair was clean (I have scalp psoriasis and have to use prescription shampoo). A friend had come round to help me with my hair treatment as I have allergy issues on my hands and to accompany me to the surgery (I suffer from agoraphobia). She then asked me where I live (an affluent part of town but I am a social housing tenant) then immediately asked my why I wasn't paying to go private with a therapist as though she thought I was rolling in money. Then she asked why I didn't move to where my parent is because 'it is so pretty there'. She asked me who helps me with day to day things and I said 2 or 3 friends to which she responded 'Oh lucky you! I wish my friends would do things like that for me'. I felt really uncomfortable and tearful. When I left, there was no mention of crisis lines, what do if I felt worse etc.
Today, she said that I had 'quite a nice lifestyle, living in town then able to take breaks at the coast. Lots of people would live to do that' - I explained that I don't see the coast when I am there as I am with sick parent who can't walk and is very ill with a degenerative illness. She then made me do a family tree and said 'You told me you have no family but you had lots of people around you' - I pointed out that most were dead or were abusive or had colluded in abuse so although they exist, they may as well not have. It left me feeling hugely distressed and again, like she was unempathetic. She then made a comment that my coat was 'stylish' which sounds like a compliment but felt like a judgment given everything else going on.
She then informed me that she had contacted the PTSD people at the hospital and they had written back saying there wasn't enough evidence of PTSD so they couldn't accept her referral.
I was gobsmacked. I have had the diagnosis for 2 years by two highly qualified MH professionals, nothing has changed, in fact it has got worse so who knows what this woman has written about me to them after one hour in my company during which time she was making assumptions about me, my lifestyle, my finances, my clothing choices etc.
I desperately need a referral back to the PTSD people and I feel tearful, nauseous, shaky and my arousal levels are sky high right now. It felt like she was interrogating me and no empathy. I am worried she has written things that are detrimental to me accessing treatment. I don't feel comfortable with her but scared she will skew it that I am paranoid or something.
How can I handle this situation please? If anyone has advice I would be really grateful. Would it be reasonable to speak to my GP about this?