For feeling like DD would be better at nursery FT?

[Warmcandlelight]

Feeling a bit low.

I am struggling with my two year old. She refuses to eat the food I make, she refuses her nap (but desperately needs it) so by the end of the day she’s ridiculously overtired and demanding.

Her night sleep is poor due to poor day sleep and hunger probably.

At nursery she eats brilliantly and naps for nearly two hours.

I feel like she’d be better at nursery five days a week as I know she’d be eating and sleeping properly. It’s really concerning me that she isn’t doing either with me.

That's true! my little one never ate plain pizza until she helped make it. you can get pre-made dough, grated cheese and tinned pizza tomato topping. And children rolling pin along adult ones. She gobbled that up!

My daughter 2.5 also can't sit to eat at the table for tea,she's gone after one bite and having far too much fun.she does eat really well with a picnic box of lunch in the car seat in the way home from nursery,maybe that works for you,going out and then feeding her picnic style on the way home.mine defo gets most of her calories out and about and then at home just wants to run around.i think key is not to get stressed about it and just present food in fun ways at this time and wait it out!

There's definitely things you can do to help, some great ideas on the thread.

I do think though that you need to (maybe... it's hard to tell) address the issue with boundaries. 2 years old is the exact age they are constantly pushing. If you're constantly moving the boundary, they don't know where it is so they'll just push it even further. So, for example, I love the idea that she needs to sit with you while you eat, even if she doesn't eat. But she needs to sit there and you just keep putting her back on the chair if she gets off. She will learn, she will tantrum, she will refuse but she'll learn. Where I work, the number of parents who say their kids don't sit and eat at the table.... And yes, it takes a bit of time to teach them but they all do it because you can't have them up and down. We don't shout or get angry but explain that you have to sit down at the table at lunchtime or snack time. It's ok if you don't want your food but you can sit there for a while anyway. You can build the time up, start with 5 minutes, then 10 then 15. But do insist. It is a particularly tiring age because you're just constantly reinforcing the boundaries!

For example, in nursery nearly every child struggles with nap time at first for a certain amount of time, but they know they will be put back on the mat over and over and after a week or so (or quicker!), they give up because they understand they are not going to be able to go and play.

I do hear you re boundaries but I do also have to be pragmatic about it - I’ve tried for the best part of a year to get her to eat at the table and she just won’t. She flings herself backwards, yells and screams … it’s horrible and I feel like it adds to eating problems because it makes mealtimes a stressful and unpleasant experience for both of us, rather than relaxing and enjoyable.

It’s only this summer she started to reliably eat at home (she was FT at nursery last year) and that was when I just put food down and let her eat it as and whenShe wanted. Which worked well but now she’s refusing dinner and lunch.

She does need reminders and prompts to eat - sometimes I do have to spoon feed her. I’m just trying to keep it as relaxed as possible and combine this with her not wasting away!