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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Neighbour keeps telling Dd to put some socks on

39 replies

justcantthinkofone · 04/12/2022 22:18

And saying that’s how she’s getting ill.

We live abroad, but it’s fairly cold right now -14 degrees now, around 17 in the day (it’s coldish for us)
Dd, 4, loves running around the house with no socks on, I keep telling her to put her socks and slippers on, but she invariably takes them off. She often runs into the garden barefoot. Our next door neighbour is an older lady married to a retired Dr, she keeps saying to put socks on the last few weeks. We’ve all been ill last week and Dh was telling the Dr about it after we’d recovered, Dr’s wife starts saying again how Dd got ill because she had no socks on etc. Isn’t this an old fashioned way to think? Can we really get ill from this? Dh is now blaming me and saying she has to wear her socks

OP posts:
toomuchlaundry · 04/12/2022 22:20

Why is it your fault and not DH’s that she wasn’t wearing socks?

DisplayPurposesOnly · 04/12/2022 22:21

Dh is now blaming me and saying she has to wear her socks

Tell him it's his fucking job as he is just as much her parent as you are.

Original poster
justcantthinkofone · 04/12/2022 22:26

I’m with her 80% of the time.
He’s not blaming me in an awful way, but saying ‘She really has to make sure she keeps her socks on all day’ I don’t see it as that important!

OP posts:
FadedRed · 04/12/2022 22:27

It’s a well-known medical fact that wearing socks prevents all manner of illnesses. If only we had all understood this basic fact before Covid struck.
Tell nosy neighbour and ‘D’H that from now on you will glue or nail your DD’s socks on. That’ll learn her.

Allsnotwell · 04/12/2022 22:28

I find a staple gun much more effective.

Twillow · 04/12/2022 22:28

If she's cold she will tell you/not take her socks off surely? Nobody gets ill from wet hair/bare feet etc these are old wives tales. You're not shutting her in the garden, she's choosing to go out there.

TheTartfulLodger · 04/12/2022 22:34

It's true. Socks can prevent STI's too. Well i can't seem to get any sex when i'm wearing them anyway.

Everydayimhuffling · 04/12/2022 22:36

She may be married to a doctor, but apparently that doesn't mean she understands germ theory. I'd be annoyed with your DH, though. The sock thing I would accept as par for the course from random strangers/neighbours, but your DH should do some research before he decides that nonsense is necessary. Surely that's a basic expectation?

CuddlesPleaseTiddles · 04/12/2022 22:38

Well, if you're in a medditerenean country it's fairly normal for people to say such things to parents and give advice. While this may sound nosy and annoying to some other cultures, there's no harm or malice intended, people especially elderly think they're being caring and helpful. Why are you very upset about this? Smile and complain that she keeps taking them off, or try the socks. Either way, not worth getting upset over.

PrettyMuchBollocks · 04/12/2022 22:39

Not sure how I’m still alive then. About 2°c here and I’m barefoot (am 90% of the time) and have lived into my 5th decade without succumbing to my deathbed with flu/pneumonia/covid/any other illness caused by a virus or bacteria, not by naked feet🙄🙄 My father and aunt whenever I see them still harp on about the fact I go out with wet hair, or no scarf, or drive with the car window open (that one’s guaranteed to give me a stiff neck apparently). Just ignore it op.

handbagsandholidays · 04/12/2022 22:40

My mother in law is forever telling me off for not wearing socks. I do wonder whether it's a generational or cultural thing!

Outfor150 · 04/12/2022 22:44

If it’s cold, she should be in socks or slippers, though.

Nagado · 04/12/2022 22:45

I’m not a scientist or medical professional. Science was not my strong point at school. But I’m preeeeety sure the temperature of your feet doesn’t make a difference between catching a cold and not catching it. Smile and nod at your neighbour. Laugh at your DH and tell him to stop being so utterly silly.

ChiefWiggumsBoy · 04/12/2022 22:46

Outfor150 · 04/12/2022 22:44

If it’s cold, she should be in socks or slippers, though.

Why? If she clearly isn’t feeling cold? Only one of my three gets cold feet like me. We have matching slippers. The other two and their dad basically have bare feet all the time.

Oysterbabe · 04/12/2022 22:47

DD will not keep socks on ever. Being cold does not make you ill.

CuddlesPleaseTiddles · 04/12/2022 22:48

*oh another great way to deal with this is to ask for more advice and bore her with it! Chicken soup with lemon, does she have any good recipes? Which socks, wool? Does she know a shop that at sells a non itchy good thermal?

Pictograph · 04/12/2022 22:48

YANBU and they both sound annoying (neighbour and DH). I was barefoot all the time as a child and never got ill!

ReallyTiredAndHungry · 04/12/2022 22:49

Well technically if she is in the garden with no socks she will be tracking things inside the house, which could, depending on where you live, be contributing to illness.

MarigoldPetals · 04/12/2022 22:51

It’s hard for people on MN to advise as the uk probably has different views on this to another, hotter country with a different culture.

unkownone · 04/12/2022 22:51

My youngest when she was 3 to around age 6 would go through winter (not as cold as UK weather, but still very cold) in very short hot pink pants and crop top lol (had sensory issues) No shoes and very little clothing. I couldn't get her to wear clothes. I gave up the fight and she never was sick.

Original poster
justcantthinkofone · 04/12/2022 22:54

I think it’s mad she doesn’t have socks on in winter as I can’t have bare feet and love my big, woolly socks and slippers. I bought her so many lovely pairs but she just takes them off and runs outside like a feral child 🤷🏻‍♀️🤣
I definitely think it must be an age and cultural thing…when Dd was born (in a v hot July) We took her in the garden in her noses basket but had us all under the shade of a big umbrella whilst she napped in her babygro. Next door neighbour was aghast she was outside, I was saying it was ok as she was obviously in the shade, I assumed she was wondered about the sun as it was 40 odd degrees, no, it was that she thought she should be wrapped up and would catch cold 🤷🏻‍♀️She also said not to take her out anywhere until she was 3 months or older, for walks etc and to meet others 🙈
Dh believes it to be true as he was told it by a Dr as he puts it, so assumes the Dr is completely correct about it.
I can just imagine her when indoors complaining about the English mum who lets her kid run around barefoot in the depths of the (17 degrees) harsh winter

OP posts:
Original poster
justcantthinkofone · 04/12/2022 22:58

*Moses
*Worried

OP posts:
ichundich · 04/12/2022 23:01

I think it depends on the person. I suffer terribly with cold feet and don't feel warm or happy if my feet are cold. I think there was an article on the BBC website recently explaining how the body has to fight harder when it's trying to stay warm: www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-63602501
Having said that my kids are always underdressed in winter (from my point of view), but hardly ever ill. At 4 your daughter probably knows if she's cold / uncomfortable or not.

peppapig79 · 04/12/2022 23:03

Oh fgs sake tell your neighbour to mind her own business. Both my kids (6 and 13) hate socks always take them off they don't get ill from it.

Caterina99 · 04/12/2022 23:05

My feet are always freezing. I love my slippers!

DD rips off socks, slippers, everything and is always barefoot where possible. It just doesn’t seem to bother her at all and our house is not particularly warm.

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