Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To tell my ex’s girlfriend that he’s cheating on her again?

19 replies

Scottsy100 · 04/12/2022 17:21

Bit of background I split up with my ex around a year ago, thought it was just a relationship breakdown really and these things happen, but after the break up and after he moved out it all came out that he had cheated on me, quite a few times in the last 5-6 years, we were only together for 7. Any way me being stupid decided to try and forgive him and give him another chance and we were having some honest conversations and making some progress, all the while we were still ahem “involved “. He was telling me he wasn’t looking for anyone else, then he had a bit of a breakdown due to work stuff and probably due to the fact he had spent the last half a decade living a double life but hey what do I know.

I still supported him through this and we carried on as we were, FF to a couple of months later where he basically just tells me he has a new girlfriend when he had only slept with me 3 weeks prior to this. Well when I found out about timelines later down the line he had only got in touch with this total random from an acquaintance’s FB page 2 weeks after his apparent mental breakdown, great way to start a new relationship hey 🙄 so he had clearly been seeing us both. She also lives 4 hours away in Wales so he was lying to me about going away for work. And all the time apologising to me for cheating and telling me he is trying to be a better man whilst STILL seeing someone else behind my back.

sorry for the rambling but I think the background info is key because I’ve told her once before that he had cheated on her with me which he did but he told her nothing had happened and she chose to believe him *amazing what a free holiday will do isn’t it.

Thing is he’s cheating on her again, AIBU to tell her again or shall I just leave her to learn on her own as I’ve already tried to warn her before?

OP posts:
Globetrotterwitch · 04/12/2022 17:26

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

IncompleteSenten · 04/12/2022 17:28

Don't bother.
You gain nothing by that.

Stichintime · 04/12/2022 17:30

Leave them to it and get an STI check if you haven't already.

unicornsarereal72 · 04/12/2022 17:30

She wouldn't believe you. He will make you out as the bitter ex. Just be glad he is someone else's problem now.

Scottsy100 · 04/12/2022 17:46

We don’t have a relationship but I am concerned that he is involving our daughter in this relationship as it’s clearly not going to last and is going to have a detrimental effect on my daughter

OP posts:
StripeyDeckchair · 04/12/2022 17:48

No your circus
Not your monkeys

Leave well alone, its none of your business.

ThirtyThreeTrees · 04/12/2022 17:51

He cheated on you & you still slept with him again. She'll probably do the same.

RewildingAmbridge · 04/12/2022 17:52

Who is he cheating on her with? You again?

IAmTi · 04/12/2022 17:54

No just swerve her if you see her in the street.

Scottsy100 · 04/12/2022 17:55

IAmTi · 04/12/2022 17:54

No just swerve her if you see her in the street.

She lives 4 hours away from me it’s not likely 🤣

OP posts:
crosstalk · 04/12/2022 18:04

I would be concerned about your mutual daughter getting involved with someone who could be a very pleasant person but where the relationship isn't going to last because of your ex's behaviour. I wouldn't bother telling her that he's a slag - sadly she'll find out as you did. Hopefully before she has a child or marries him.

CarefreeMe · 04/12/2022 18:11

No just leave them to it.

Work on yourself and make sure you don’t have sex with him ever again.

You can’t stop him from introducing his child to any of his gfs unfortunately and if you say anything to him he’ll probably just do it to spite you.

greenritta · 04/12/2022 18:16

What about taking him not to get your DD attached to someone if he's not serious? And be upfront that by "not serious" you mean a woman who he's cheating on.

StopStartStop · 04/12/2022 18:17

Leave it. He's not worth the bother.

I carried on having sex with the ex husband until just before he remarried - three years. It afforded me a mild amusement to think he was unfaithful to her with me, as he'd been previously unfaithful to me with her. And I liked the cock.

Scottsy100 · 04/12/2022 19:16

StopStartStop · 04/12/2022 18:17

Leave it. He's not worth the bother.

I carried on having sex with the ex husband until just before he remarried - three years. It afforded me a mild amusement to think he was unfaithful to her with me, as he'd been previously unfaithful to me with her. And I liked the cock.

Funnily enough those were my feelings at first

OP posts:
CarefreeMe · 04/12/2022 19:36

I carried on having sex with the ex husband until just before he remarried - three years. It afforded me a mild amusement to think he was unfaithful to her with me, as he'd been previously unfaithful to me with her. And I liked the cock.

In the nicest way you both end up looking like idiots and he’s laughing having sex with both of you and God knows who else.

It’s better to not let yourself get treated like shit, as in the end the only person who is going to lose is you.

NormalNans · 04/12/2022 19:48

Scottsy100 · 04/12/2022 17:46

We don’t have a relationship but I am concerned that he is involving our daughter in this relationship as it’s clearly not going to last and is going to have a detrimental effect on my daughter

Is that really your primary concern because your posts read much more along the lines of someone who is angry that their ex cheated on them with this woman and then wants to get their own back.

HopelesslyOptimistic · 04/12/2022 20:45

Sounds like you love the drama. Jesus move on and think about your child.

Scottsy100 · 04/12/2022 20:58

NormalNans · 04/12/2022 19:48

Is that really your primary concern because your posts read much more along the lines of someone who is angry that their ex cheated on them with this woman and then wants to get their own back.

Oh the ex cheated on me with loads of women I’m over that part of it for sure

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page