My mum was abusive/neglectful in numerous ways. When I call her out on anything she refuses to admit it, feels underminded and I recieve an invoice for a number of toys/experiences my mum bought me as a child and she asks for a contribution towards the money she spent feeding and clothing me, all to "prove" she was a good parent.
When I became an older child I always had to do something for her, in return for what she provided for me. Looking back they were jobs she should have done as my parent with no expectation of anything from me.
When i got older i wouldnt get anything for christmas, but for birthdays I would get a few of cheap versions of the essentials she should have been buying me anyway and nothing else and she regrets what she spent on me as a child.
When I recieved money I had to pay for what I needed until it was gone then she would resume but if I spent it on something for myself then I had to go without what I needed.
At times I didnt have everything I needed, at other times I had more than enough but at the end of the day I would rather have had a mentally sane parent.
This was longer than it should have been but I just wanted to talk about it
AIBU to refuse her gifts at christmas as she will have expectations for it.