As a child, whenever she would give me a gift, for christmas, a birthday, whathever, later on she would tell me to do things for her and if I refused she would say something like "I bought you that toy" and if I still refused she would then threaten to remove the things she has bought me over the years/destroy them/give them to other kids. She followed through. They were really jobs that she should have been doing as the parent. No I wasnt doing her taxes. When I was older, she gave me a ridiculously tiny amount each week to feed/clothe myself it was also to cover anything I needed/wanted and I was meant to be greatful for any small treats she gave me. She would not pay for things I needed if I had recieved even a small amount of money, she would tell me to use that until it was gone. Then at an unreasonable age she made me pay for most and then all my food/needs/wants out of my tiny wage. Even years later she has been reminding me of the things she has bought me as a child to get me to do things for her now and started keeping reciepts/order confirmations for everything to tot up her spends and even requested the money for it all back on numerous occasions when we have fallen out.
I havent been paying for anything back and know I dont owe her but I am sick of her hanging it over my head.
I am really disgusted by her and dont understand why shes always been like this.
There are numerous other questionable things she still says/does to me. shes fine to my DD, so i havent gone no contact and want them to have a relationship.
If i decline a gift from mum she will not care and tell me to suit myself or if she is insistent I know she has already thought of something she wants me to do for her.
Christmas is coming up and she is doing something "big" so I dread to think what she expects from me now.