Angry colleague

[Blueisthecolour1]

I missed a team meeting earlier this week as I was out on a visit, seeing a client (obviously work-related!). One of my colleagues in the team is going to become a dad in the New Year & at the meeting he apparently shared his good news with everyone. I texted him later to say I’d missed the meeting as was out on a visit, and I assume he shared his news there.

We had been talking some time back & he had hinted at changes to come, saying he would explain soon. Other colleagues had meanwhile filled me in that he was going to be a dad. I’m very excited for him so I sent him the message above.

I got this really abrupt text back from said colleague, saying - Yes, I didn’t see you there at the team meeting, thought you were maybe off. Booking a meeting on team meeting day, you missed (another colleague’s) birthday present & card.

Followed by another text - My news about what?

AIBU to think this is an unnecessarily rude response to what was just a pleasant question? Bearing in mind this person is not someone I know very well, and they’re not senior to me so what right do they have to tick me off about how I arrange my work diary? Im really quite pissed off - no-one else is fussed I missed the meeting, I’ve been to meetings the colleague hasn’t been at. I haven’t replied as I’m not really sure why he thinks it’s ok to talk to me like I’m his subordinate when I was just trying to be pleasant?

That's hilarious! Did the pregnant colleague respond?

How odd. Well this is what you get when you have workplaces trying to become bloody second families instead of maintaining work boundaries. I’m sick of acting like I have an extended family and being told off for not being christmassy etc. Sorry rant over.

@LabradorEyes it all got rather embarrassing as they sort of bumbled through trying to explain they didn't want to announce straight away, it was like a scene from the office. I had to hide behind my computer screen.

So you made it clear you already knew his news when he hadn't actually told you himself?

Yes -query if he's joking or annoyed. Put a bit more mansplaining on him

I don't miss the drama of working in an office and all the required ettiquette tbh. If somebody moans at my current workplace the plant manager gets the dummy out his draw (literally). 😂 It's a great way of shutting nobheads up.

Sorry, this is way too placatory. Ignore the twat.

maybe I'm tone deaf as well but i didn't really read anything into his text- he was just filling you in on something else that has happened. The second one i assume he didn't know what you'd been told and was just checking

I don’t really get why you say you’re “very excited” for him to become a father when you’ve also said you don’t really know him that well?

Yeah I didn’t get that bit either

I’d prob send him a reply with some laughing emoji 😂😂😂and say “Good one. For a while there I thought you were serious!

@KettrickenSmiled

OBVIOUSLY you need to prioritise your team's personal & social news, & never mind client needs or managing the business ...
I wouldn't give this a moment's thought OP.
It;s just a bit of passive aggressive fuckwittery, available in every UK office.

These were exactly my thoughts, Kettricken.