To think the pandemic has left me totally numb?

[Footlooseandtethereddown]

Anyone else feeling like?
I am completely meh about everything, going through the motions. I was meant to be going to a concert last week which had been planned for ages and was an artist I like. At the last moment one of my dc was ill and I couldn’t go. My mum asked if I was disappointed and I realised I wasn’t. I was just totally not bothered either way.
Then I considered that some more and realised that is how I feel post pandemic. I will do what I’m supposed to do and socialise and appear ‘normal’ but actually I don’t enjoy any of it. I don’t not enjoy it either. It’s all one and the same.

It seems to now transcend to everything. Things I should be pleased about, no feeling about it. Things I should be worried / disappointed about. No feeling. It’s all very level and disconnected.

i wasn’t like this before the pandemic so I can only think it’s that?! But everyone else I know irl seems fine.

Anyone here feeling like this?
AIBU to blame the pandemic for my total indifference to almost every sphere of my life?!

I definitely feel different since Covid. The amount of anxiety and fear we had during such a crazy few years. Then we are just meant to bounce back to normal?

im a sociable and active person but I find big group events overwhelming, struggle to be calm at the office after years of WFH. My lethargy has just grown so much and I just want to stay home and have a quiet life now.

I wish I wanted to get back out there - cinema, dinners, shopping, Christmas parties etc. but I just want to be left alone with my family…

The general state of the world also gets to me more - like we’re waiting for the next big pandemic or world drama. If you don’t read the news and just go out in the world it’s hard to notice anything’s different. People seem to be eating out, shopping etc as normal?

Apathy is a sign of depression OP

We are the same. It feels like so long ago at this stage that if I was feeling depressed now I wouldn't link it to covid at all. I have had so many things happen since covid, almost dying of sepsis and being diagnosed with an illness that causes chronic pain being the most notable for me. I don't know anyone that is still mentioning covid the way it comes up here.

I worked really long hours during lockdowns as I have an online store and well everyone was ordering everything online so I barely had a chance to register that we were in lockdowns sometimes so maybe that plays a part. I didn't actually have much time to miss going out and doing things because I was so busy with work and the kids.

For most of us the pandemic was a blip and we've adjusted back to normality and got on with things. Some of you feed off each other's negativity, you really do - it's not healthy.

Put some fairy lights up, get some tasty food in, watch something lighthearted on telly, read a not depressing book, get a coffee with a friend!

@KateBain , the old fairy lights to ward off existential angst approach 😂

You’re lucky to have come out unscathed but not everyone has. You could accuse absolutely everyone experiencing any kind of emotional hangover from the pandemic as - what? Being over-sensitive and too negative? You must know that kind of thinking is a very blunt tool.

Attitude does matter, and taking responsibility for our mood, and trying to stay positive - but that only goes so far in relation to trauma or the after effects of shock. Everyone’s different.

the old fairy lights to ward off existential angst approach

Give it a try 🙂

Yes I have been known to deploy fairy lights and do all manner of cheerful things! It’s good stuff in its place, I’m not denying it @KateBain But it’s not really the point of the thread. It’s sweet of you to reach out with what works for you I guess 😊 A lot of people have more complex things to deal with is all I am saying.

At the end of the day we were all facing the same storm but not all in the same boat. All our feelings are valid, everyone of them. I worked 12 hour days whilst being verbally abused by people because they couldn't get an apparently essential item to finish their home improvement. In the meantime Doctors, nurses, paramedics, police, fire firefighters and HCP were dealing with very essential life and death situations. I would watch the news and see reports of families losing loved ones and not being able to be there. All this happened whilst I was dealing with people crying or screaming because they had to queue or couldn't get the right shade of paint. It has dulled my view on humanity slightly and left me feeling numb.

It’s a horrible time. I feel very odd, too. Not myself at all. I think pps have mentioned the covid/lockdown depression, coupled with the cost of living crisis, war in Ukraine etc.
Just feels like the beginning of the end of the world, or something 😵‍💫

I’m like this too. Altho I was like this way before the pandemic and the pandemic just amplified it.

Exactly, all feelings are valid in response to something so deeply significant.

I feel the same.

And I think it's a combination of things. Covid, the war, climate change.

Covid has accelerated a lot of things : everything being online for instance.
I really do not think it's a good thing at all. People are glued to their cells all the time. God help our kids, their mental health is shot already.

I WFH and at first I thought, this is great! At home! All the time! But I don't think it's actually that it's good for mental health.

I've noticed also that other people seem to have become frighteningly quickly desocialised. Maybe it's just me they don't like, ha, but it seems like people just Cba making conversation in real life.

And as pp's have mentioned, the government are awfully quiet about the pandemic. They think we have forgotten that people died alone, in hospitals, visitors forbidden? Whilst they drank champagne?

My mum was suffering from psychosis at the time, I was still working full time and trying to manage her care with two teenagers who were locked indoors. It was tough so knowing that the people who were running our country and are still elected to do that were drinking champagne eating birthday cake was hard.

I agree, I had quite a big mental health breakdown during lockdown living alone, I recovered but ever since I just feel detached. No genuine sadness or happiness but I also don't feel depressed, just OK. I think it may be because I realise now how little things matter, lockdown and my mental health was my lowest, so now I feel I've already experienced and over came the 'worst' and could probably do it again so I'm just meh about everything? I'm not sure that makes sense

Not weird - OH and I had tickets to a gig, bday pressie for my OH for a band we both like. Got into town, walked to the venue, saw the queue outside and went home again. Weren’t bothered at all - realised we’d rather have gone to the cinema with some pick and mix. Or even better, stayed home with Netflix. Meant to meet a few friends for drag queens and pho a couple of weeks ago and three of us out of the four dropped out despite having paid for tickets etc due to illness (amongst other reasons). Wasn’t massively bothered though sad I wouldn’t see them. Everything is just a bit meh - enjoy it if I’m there but not excited to go. Except being with my other half, at home, with the cats. I prefer to do that more than anything now.

It makes sense to me. I thought I wasn't really affected by being alone before we were allowed to form bubbles but I think it's left more of a mark than I realised. My friend who lives with her husband (they became my bubble when it was allowed) seemed to take it all much harder and missed her wide friendship circle very much. I developed a sense of nothing seeming to matter very much and to some extent I still have it. I know I've become irritated by people fussing over small things and things they could just let go - and I've become a less nice person I think. I really only cared about not being able to to travel, whereas my friend lost interest in it and still thinks anyone who gets on a plane is bound to get covid.

I think the WFH prevalence has desocialsed people too, and made people's worlds smaller. I reckon the effect on mental health and relationships will be with us for a long time, and the sense of powerless with other country and world situations has had an impact as well.