To need a fucking minute...

[purpleviolet1987]

I'm a working single parent.
It doesn't stop; the school run, the commute, the work, the after school clubs, the dictatorship administration team that works at my child's school, the constant emails from said dictatorship moaning about absolutely everything you can imagine.

At the end of each day my body aches, I mean it starts in my hips, my head pounds, my back is in agony, I'm dizzy.

I don't feel sad but I don't feel happy. I feel like my mind is doing everything but my body is screaming at me to slow down.

I don't get the chance to process anything, every thought is interrupted, every letter is shoved on the 'later' pile. I'm always forgetting something, I'm getting lazier with meals.

How do you guys cope with the constant everything of everyday parenting/working life.

I just want/need a day in bed where I don't have to move a muscle except to get snacks or change the channel.

I see plenty of others coping just fine, I feel like I'm constantly unwell, I'm struggling like buggery at work pretending I'm not in pain all day.

You are not alone and yes, burnout is very real. I won't bore you with my whole story, but I can say as much as I had an unfortunate accident and still felt that I need to carry on regardless! (I have now long term health issues thanks to my stoicism. )

Anyway I learned the hard way to have a regular "F All Day" ! I don't cook, I don't clean, I am not a taxi service ... I just let the DC do whatever they want as long as it doesn't involve me. My fridge has enough easy food for everyone to sort themselves out. (My DC are teenagers) I do however binge watch TV, stay in bed or lounge on the settee.
I think we all need an F All day once in a while- time to introduce it to your DC!

OP
I am right there with you. Have been considering posting the something similar but was afraid of the snarky replies about how lucky I am to be a single parent....

It's so fucking hard isn't it... I particularly feel for you working in a school so kids then home, so kids. Holidays always with kids.

I missed how old the kids are? I'm not sure I've got any answers but I'm feeling it with you atm.

Do you work full time in a school? Is there any scope to drop to four days a week?

I've done full time school work as a single mum and it's horrendous, although it was juggling caring for elderly parents as an only child as well that finished me off.

How old is your child/ren?

One thing to consider...for a weekend or even the school hols...get ready meals for the duration and picky stuff for lunches plus paper plates. At least it's one less thing.

Call in sick without guilt. Better to have one day off once in a while when you are on your knees with exhaustion than six months signed off with stress or some stress-triggered physical illness.

Don't feel guilty about slipping with meals. As long as they are reasonably healthy, it's fine to have fast food. Beans on wholemeal toast, filled pastas with broccoli , eggs or fish fingers and oven sweet potato fries and peas etc - that stuff takes less than 5 mins to prep but is perfectly healthy. Especially if they have school dinners too.

Can you have a duvet day or late start at least one morning a week? I got so exhausted when DC were small, that I used to put out a big toy in the living room - some duplo or a toy garage or something after they'd gone to bed, and they had to go down and play with it, then watch cartoons if they woke up at silly o'clock (which they always did.) It only gave me an extra 30 mins in bed sometimes, but it helped.

Add the reminder for advent calendars to your phone now for next year.

Not helpful! The bloody Advent calendars are not the issue.

Call in sick.

Give yourself permission at the weekend to let yourselves have a day to all stay in PJs, watch a screen all day and eat snacks. Use that time to rest yourself, chill and maybe gather your thoughts and get a few things done.

It’s like a Reset Day and it’s worked wonders for me and my mental health and my ability to cope with the other 6 days. I don’t do it every week, maybe once every 7/8 weeks.

I feel exactly the same.
Except i wfh full time when my DD goes to bed, so we are together 24/7. Theres no one to help with childcare and i dont qualify for the free hours until next July.

I feel so bad as i feel like im just meal prepping, washing up, cleaning up after mealtimes, doing laundry etc. Constantly, instead of playing with her.
She hasnt napped since she was 18 months so dont even get an hour to myself during the day.
Now the terrible 2's are in full swing 😫