Not watching my brothers kids until their bug problem is taken care of

[mybrothersbedbugs]

My brother and his girlfriend have varying work schedules and are on call. Because of their schedules it's hard for them to plan for childcare. Especially for overnight. So, when they are both working I will have their kids over. Usually 2-3 times a week.

I found out the other day from my sister that our brother's house has bedbugs. I have no idea how long they have been there or how severe the infestation is, but I have heard they are having their house treated. I'm going to have my house treated just in case. I do not want to risk a big infestation at my house. I've heard a lot of horror stories about bed bug infestations and how it can be very hard to rid your house of them.

I confronted my brother about it because I was a little upset he did not tell me about it. I also told him at the same time that I will not be having his kids over until the bedbugs are completely gone. I've read that it can take 3 to 6 weeks to get rid of bedbugs so I think neither of us or our family members should go over to each others houses in the mean time so as to prevent the bugs from moving back and forth between houses and bypassing the treatments.

My brother doesn't seem to think it's a big deal and thinks I'm being paranoid. He says suddenly stopping their childcare is going overboard and will make things very hard for them because they will have no one to watch their kids overnight. He thinks it's my OCD is making me act irrational again and I need to stop reading about horror stories online. To be honest I have had some severe issues with cleaning and contamination in the past because of my OCD. Although I have worked through many of my issues with a therapist. I'm not currently seeing one though and I wanted to check and see if this is something normal to get obsessed about or if it's just in my head.

My brother thinks that at the very least I should give them a couple weeks to find some alternate childcare while we both get our houses treated. I really don't want to wait though. I would rather get this taken care of as soon as possible. I keep feeling like I have things crawling on me even though I have looked up close and haven't seen anything. I'll probably be up all night putting things in the dryer and vacuuming.

I am not particularly fussy about cleaning generally, but in your shoes I would be making the same suggestion as you have.

I have a DD with diagnosed OCD, and if it was her, I suspect that once she was aware of the potential issue, her OCD won't 'let' her forget about it enough to be able to relax how she feel about it. It wouldn't be a case of someone trying to guilt her into accepting having potential bed bugs by calling her paranoid or accusing her of overreacting, she simply wouldn't be able to get past it.

I personally think it's fine to stand your ground.

His opinion is not necessary..
This is a decision you have taken for your home.
Don't enter into a conversation with him . State the fact they won't be coming end of

YANBU! I’ve had bedbugs: it is fucking horrific. I wouldn’t let anyone in our house other than the fumigator people until it was completely clear and we didn’t venture out or see friends or do ANYTHING until same. They’re utter utter bastards.

His opinion is irrelevant! You are providing childcare for them several times a week (free or paid?!) and can stop it whenever you want to.

Is he paying you the going rate for this regular childcare?

Nope nope nope. Do not blame you in the least.

There is no way I would be risking a bed bug infestation any more than you already have. It is incredibly expensive to get rid of them if nothing else.

I wouldn't be taking in that amount of childcare in the first place never mind the rest of it

Nope don't let them stay, also make sure the children haven't been bitten as it can turn really nasty quickly.

Impetigo, not sure if I've spelt that correctly is awful and something to watch the children for, it will start along the bite marks like scabs and spreads like wildfire.

I’m pretty relaxed about cleanliness but there is no way I’d want to risk a bed bug infestation in my house. You are not being unreasonable. Keep saying no. Hugs xx

@AhNowTed Free

They need different jobs- three overnights a week is a huge burden. More than most single fathers do!

Seems a little overboard to be fumigati g your house with no evidence of a bed bug infestation at your house. Will they look first??
not unreasonable to stop the childcare until their house has been given the all clear though.

Absolutely agree with you, no one going back and forth between you until this is sorted.

But I also think three nights a week is far too much to expect anyone to do for nothing. No way is this a good idea long term.

Your brother is an entitled twat. He gives you nothing?? Fuck him.

Bedbugs are a nightmare. I have direct experience and burning your house down is the only real solution to them.

I would be staying well away. They can also travel in fabrics, in luggage etc.

Had you noticed bites on the kids? They are usually in lines and small red bumps.