To think this response from my fellow student was quite uncalled for and OTT?

[Ahsoka2001]

I'm a postgrad student and for our next assessment we have to do a group presentation. They're randomly assigned and I was originally in a group of 4, but then it turned out the other 2 had been put in by mistake and I was left in a pair with just one other student.

Our seminar tutor emailed another group consisting of 3 students politely asking if me and my partner would be able to join theirs.

Then one member of the group replied at 2am with a huge email (almost 1,500 words) saying that no, it's not OK, because most of their work has already been finished on the basis of 3 people performing, not 5.

OK...I can kind of see what he means, but there's more. He said very bluntly to the tutor that as a "customer" paying £10K his personal time should not be interfered with due to her "poor management of forming the groups" (he thought he'd have to re-schedule free time to accommodate us joining).

Also, he said if she insisted I join his group he would discuss leaving the university with his personal tutor because his confidence in the quality of teaching here would be ruined. He seemed to be trying to tell her how to handle the situation himself e.g. "Most important for you is to consider the options below on how to handle this" and "Consider these points and discuss with your colleagues if necessary".

Also - "Lecturers are required to respond in 72 hours. You gave me less than 24 hours to respond to your email" and "Are you seriously considering inflating the group by 66%?"

^ Just to give you an idea of the email's tone.

Regardless of the tutor's management of things (some other students have had similar thoughts) I can NEVER imagine writing something like that to a lecturer as a student. Am I wrong, or was this an uncalled for response?

This -but I don't see why you were copied in and it seems very mansplaining and rude.

I can think of a few explanations:

• he is one of those who takes himself very seriously or
• he has had to really make loads of changes to his life in order to do the MA or
• the stakes for him are very high or
• this isn't the first issue he's had
• he has a really hard time with changes

Either way his response is only going to get everyones backs up. Conflict resolution is not his strong point.

I like this idea.

I work in a university (not as a lecturer) and have been on the receiving end of some of these emails. I honestly wonder how some of the students will cope in their working lives. The last one was a student who was outraged that there was a workshop organised for 2pm in 3 days time. He'd made plans apparently and couldn't just cancel them because I'm so incompetent at timetabling (he's a full time student and should be available during teaching hours). He copied in all the most senior managers in his tirade- I'm just the administrator who sent the notification after being asked to organise it.

This. I have bipolar disorder and ADHD and sometimes the bastarding illnesses conspire to make me manic and hyperfocused on writing a very long complaint detailing every minute detail about something random that on another month would just mildly annoy me. This comes across like that. But I always know I’ve been unreasonable and when I get insight into the mood episode or get it treated, I’m quite embarrassed by it.

Don’t take it personally, but don’t pander to him; either he’ll get the help he needs or if he’s just a twat he’ll get enough rope to hang himself eventually.

I'm not a lecturer but have had several threats of High Court action from disgruntled students! Par for the course sadly...

😂😂😂👏👏👏

That’s probably the correct response, well not that, but “Fine, leave”. Start letting pricks like this get their way you’re making a rod for your own back. It’s a fucking group presentation, not a 100 page thesis, what a pompous prick.

These kind of changes require flexibility and a calm approach that will be needed in the workplace.

🤣🤣🤣 please forward her this thread and highlight this response. I’m sure she would appreciate a good, evil, chuckle at this twerps ridiculous and shitty response.

Good god. Is there an additional course he can take there on Tact and Diplomacy?

Proper academic in the making there.

Hahahaha oh my god

Wait until he has to live in the real world.

Whatta twat.

He sounds a total arse.

But..... given that the group has already done most of the work, it's obvious that this is a very last minute request! The issue should have been sorted before.

Well, he sounds like an Arsehole.

But this: “I can NEVER imagine writing something like that to a lecturer as a student.”

If he were more polite and succinct, it’s fine to criticise a lecturer and you sound overly deferential.

I did a part time post grad where almost everyone was working full time - as it was their weekends intensive option. They were frequently late adding “homework” by their own deadlines to a team room for group work. Several of us pointed out that we scheduled full time work around these group sessions and that we were customers. They were very much treating us like young students expected to suck it up. Nope.

Oh yes, send this! It's so good from @Haffdonga.

Bollocks have they done two-thirds of the work in 4 days. When is the deadline? As other PPs have said you are probably well out of it yourself, he sounds like a nightmare to work with. As for the tone of his email, I should imagine his personal tutor might well tell him it's inappropriate and that there are ways and channels to lodge a complaint which don't involve direct criticism of a personal nature.

If the seminar tutor is in charge of marking the presentation, he's going to find himself facing some tough follow-up questions. 😂

He sounds like a pompous ass with little real world experience. In the real world when things change, reasonable grownups assess the situation and calmly present solutions to potential problems. He could have simply said, "okay, we have about 2/3ds completed. Do you have suggestions on incorporating these 2 students to make sure they can be graded equivalently and how will the grades be assessed for us based on our early work? Thank you, etc. etc.

Everything he did shows why he should not be hired for a job and shows why he should not be recommended for any future research opportunities. He's the fool, IMO.

Oh god. I’m a university lecturer and sadly there’s always at least one student per group like this. Only today I got an email about something totally out of my control and the ubiquitous “I pay £9820 a year for this course and I don’t think this is good enough “ line was trotted out.

though my students do just tend to email me and not copy half the cohort in.

He sounds like a complete arse BUT the tutor shouldn't have added both you and your original partner to the same group. It would made more sense to add one person to two different groups. Although I'm sure this guy would have had a problem with one extra person too!

It is true though isn’t it? I know it’s not your fault at all and that’s a horrible way to email. But it is such a lot of money I don’t really blame people for feeling that they’re consumers and should be able to expect good service.

He shouldn’t have written that, but he does have a point. Having two extra people added when you’ve already started the work isn’t fair. They might have decided to just get a lot of it done in the first few days. Can you not just do it as a two instead of joining an established group?

Conflict resolution is not his strong point.

Gotta be the best comment yet!

What a knob!

I don't know about anyone else, but if I sent my boss an email telling her that she might like to 'consider her options' I think the option she would choose is to let me go.

I was a course rep all the way through UG and now for PG (I’m in my 30s).

90% of the stuff I have to relate to my Lecturers/other staff members during meetings is, frankly, fucking embarrassing and I’m surprised these students don’t have their Mummy driving down to wipe their arses whenever they have a shit, tbh.

The lecturer isn't their boss, though. I'm not saying I agree with the way the email was written, but the relationship isn't manager/subordinate.

You don’t pay your boss to provide a service though. It’s not the same situation.
This guys an arsehole, not disputing that - but it’s not the same relationship.
Unfortunately the paid for service provider role has led to many behaviour like arseholes. But in some cases it has led to a valid challenge that you should get a good service for your money.