Manager wants the same time off as me for annual leave - AIBU?

[hhgvbg]

I requested to book off a week early next year last month. It got approved by the head of my team, and has been put on our formal annual leave system and on the department's calendars.

My manager has now requested the same time off, and says that nobody is off on those days even though I am, I'm not sure why they can't see I'm off either it's not showing properly in the system or he hasn't checked properly. We're not allowed to have time off at the same time due to capacity.

I know I need to message my manager but I'm not sure what to say without sounding rude. I have booked a holiday for these dates specifically, gave a lot of notice and got the time approved.

And rather than find the email you sent and the confirmation that your holiday has been approved… you thought you’d start a mumsnet thread?

@hhgvbg any update from your OP ?

You just reply to the manager to say you've already booked those dates. What's the question?

Omg reminds me when I worked in NHS I had booked months in advance a/l and a trip to South Africa. No issues. Then a newbie joined the team asking me to cancel my a/l because she wanted that time off. Tough tits!

Keep it short and factual. Copy in HR and/or the team leader who deals with it. If you want to save the manager's feelings then say that you think there has been mistake or a glitch in the system perhaps. But don't be woolly. If the manager doesn't back down then you've got a potential bullying situation brewing.

Agree about it being short and factual, and manager expecting you to change can amount to harassment or bullying.

So presumably you did the same when you asked for your days off?
He's following the process, so I don't get why you don't just reply and say - Actually, I'm off that week. Big Boss approved it on xx date.

Just email saying you booked those dates of and had the holidays approved such and such a date. Then say you have booked a holiday abroad for those dates as they were approved.

Hi @hhgvbg no big deal to remind him. Even if it fell off the system somehow, presumably you have the approval email somewhere so you can prove you asked and it was previously agreed. Rules apply to everyone 😵‍💫

It would be nice if the OP came back to clarify some points.

I'm the biggest smoother overer that exists, but even I wouldn't get bogged down in discussions about computers glitching etc.

Dear Boss
I am off 1-10 September. Please see attached email confirming agreement from big boss dated 01/10 and screen shot of holiday system below.

Kind regards
Your employee

You are nor confident and good at your job if youj can't do something as simple as state your booked time off.

Also that email example is terrible. You do not, ever, tell your manager that they can't have time off, that's not your business or your call.

Why are people making such a fuss about nothing here? "I have booked off Y to Z dates and its been approved". That's it. Nothing else needed. No angst or handwringing or any other shite needed.

Jesus do not send that email. Way overstepping. It's not up to the OP to say whether he can have the time off, just that she already has those dates booked. If his senior decides to allow two off exceptionally (say business is quiet or he has compassionate reasons) then she'll look foolish and presumptuous. Also why suggest there would be conflict? The bloke probably just hasn't looked properly. Just let him know briefly and politely 'yes, I've got x-x date booked off'. End of.

Genuine Question

have you ever had a job?!

Oh you. Sorry I missed that.

Because your suggested approach would indicate you have zero experience in any kind of workplace

@Feef83 genuine question? More like being deliberately rude to a stranger on the internet. I’ve had numerous jobs obviously 🙄. Genuine question, are you always a bellend?

I would just email a simple response of

“just so you are aware, I have already booked x to y dates off and this was approved on z date by y person”

no need to apologise- you are entitled to leave too

Not your problem. Have an amazing holiday!

Just send him a friendly email saying

Hi. I’ve just realised you want to book the same week I’m off; I thought I should let you know I’ve already booked that week it’s been approved & I’ve booked & paid to go away.
best wishes
xxxxx

if he does like it tough shit he should have read his emails correctly.

I can see why you are stressed because you are worried this will lead to a confrontation with your manager. But he or she may well have just made a genuine mistake when looking at the rota and not clocked that you had already booked the time off. It's easily done. I wouldn't leap to the conclusion that he or she is strongarming or lying, maybe they just are human and didn't clock you were already booked off. I assume you have proof (email etc) that you made the request first and had the holiday time approved. If so, just politely say so - no need to be shirty or defensive about it, just assume they made a mistake. The whole reason holiday is checked out like this is to avoid inadvertent double bookings. It's always best to assume goodwill and behave accordingly. I'm a manager myself and I've several times rearranged my own holiday dates (even though I booked first!) to help out members of my staff - I don't have school age kids and my husband has already retired, so it's usually not too tough for me to rearrange.
If, however, the manager is doing it deliberately and he or she wants to pull rank, then it is a tricky situation because it could sour relations with him or her. He or she would have to be a pretty obnoxious, self-entitled individual to behave like this, so if this is the scenario, then conflict would have ensued at some point anyway. If it comes to a fight over the holiday then someone else needs to arbitrate - probably HR. The firm should either a) let you both go on an exceptional basis b) tell your manager it's first come, first served so you are going. I don't think it is right for this manager to be allowed to ride roughshod over the holiday rota. No decent firm would allow it and no decent manager would attempt it. I would certainly never do this (my male predecessor did, but that's another story.) Hijacking the holiday rota would affect the whole team, not just you, because no-one would feel able to book vacation time with any confidence it would be honoured. So, I don't think it will come to that, but if it does, you need to go to HR and get your co-workers on board. Good luck

So just tell him. Hi... saw the message below, sorry but I've booked the same time and have therefore booked a holiday and can't change it. Hope yiu can work around that

Regards ...

Surely a simple message like.....

Hi Manager Jimmy.

I'm afraid the dates you have requested off clash with the time off I already booked off and had approved on the XX/XX/22.

Kind regards

Hhgvbg

You have followed the company guidance regarding booking the time off so I don't follow why you feel awkward.

It's not your problem. If anyone has to change, they will as you requested it first. If it bothers you, you could casually say - you do realise I am am off then.

Say it like it is. It's not rude to tell the truth. Your 'boss' isn't God and you went through the correct avenues to request that time off and have it approved. You've also booked your holiday in light of that approval. They'll have to suck it up.

Well I hope you are all happy having completely quashed someone who obviously came here for some support. I'm no shrinking violet but I have worked for a manager who was sarcastic, bullying and just generally a horrible person who had been promoted beyond his capabilities and employed all sorts of nasty tricks to avoid being found out. Such a person can wreak havoc and standing up for yourself is very difficult. Stand your ground and make sure you have done everything by the book Op and you will be fine. I'm sorry you had such a hard time on here.