Friends DH is a dick

[Grumpypelican]

My and my friend were due to go to a beer festival in our local village on Friday after the light switch on.
My DH met us after work to take DD home and her DH was supposed to do the same so we could stay.

Her DH ended up working late so she had to take DD home and we had to miss the festival. This was fine by me.

Her DH and my DH were supposed to be going on sat. They were going at 6 but rearranged to an earlier time at 2. My friend said as they were going early, we could go out after they got back.

They didn't come back till after it closed. I have no problem with this, my DH works hard.

I really felt for my friend though, her husband said he lost track of time on Friday. She told me he had been funny with her all week about it cos he wanted to go out Friday.

AIBU or is her DH an A*hole?

We had to miss our night for his work, then he didn't come home early enough for us to go

But your DH stayed on til the end, too? Preventing you & your friend from going. How’s that different to her DH?

I wasn't massively bothered about going. Was going cos she wanted to primarily. But her DH prevented it

Couldn't her DD have stayed over at yours with your DH on the Friday?

I don't think yabu though. She needs to make plans to go out that don't involve him as childcare.

My DH did offer but I think she was massively cheesed off so just went home. I just find it petty

He’s no more of an arsehole than your DH who did exactly the same thing.

Yes possibly, I dont mind my DH going out though. It's usually about once a month whereas her DH is 2 to 3 times a week.

You would think he could let her have this one night

Both your DH’s are dick heads.

I don't think ops DH did exactly the same thing.

The friends dh seems to have deliberately sabotaged the original plan on the Friday by staying late at work. Ops DH was sticking to his part of the plan.

Sure, neither went home early on the Saturday - but had it not been for friends dh working late on the Friday, that wouldn't have been an issue.

Your dh could have taken both dds.

Of course he is an arsehole. It is controlling. He prevented her for going out.

I don’t think OP’s DH is the same at all. He was there on the Friday night and ready to take both children if necessary.

The friend’s DH on the other hand deliberately sabotaged her night out.

Yes either of them could have called it a night on the Saturday but her DH should have taken the lead on this because he had ruined her Friday night.

This, Your poor friend.

YANBU. He reneged on the original agreement by staying late at work so he should have made it up to her by looking after DD on Saturday so she could go.