How do I get out of this

[namechange193297347298]

I am staying with my mum. My dad who I haven't seen since I was a baby has come to visit. Then me and my dad are meant to be booking tickets to visit his family, the journey will take all day possibly more. I wasn't sure about that
anyway, and was leaning on not to as I dont feel up to it and am getting a funny feeling, but didnt want to decline as hes come all the way up here so was going to just do it anyway.
My mum has always wound me up on purpose, at times trying to one up mhumiliate me somehow and assert herself as the one in charge, its all done over time, until I'm at breaking point. I know that may be hard to imagine without examples but there are many, its one thing after another. Ive taken myself to my room to have some time on my own but still feel like ive got feelings to let out.
It doesnt help that my dad thinks very highly of her and the way I was raised, he clearly has no idea about these underhand things that go on.
Ill just give an example from today. She has this thing about catching me out in a "lie". For example

You get out of whatever is going on here by saying No. You're an adult, you don't have to do anything you don't want to. Your mother and father don't have to like it.

Sounds like two separate issues - firstly your mum is doing your head in and secondly you don't want to travel to another country with a virtual stranger of a dad.

Tell your dad it's been nice getting to know him but travelling to another country is too much of a big step for you at the moment.

With your mum - you're going to have to call her out on her behaviour. Every time. Until she gets the message.

seriously you have no obligations to anyone who hasn’t bothered with you since you were a baby. ‘ I don’t want to do that!’ should cover it.

This

Go home.
Don't explain or argue.
Just go.

Pack your stuff, get in the car, call a taxi, get on a train, bus, whatever and go home?

If you want an excuse tell them your friend Alison called and desperately needs you to do a thing for her.

Agreed.

Tell your dad that you're enjoying getting to know him at a slow, steady pace but are not ready yet to make a long trip with him to see the rest of the family. You can say you're not ruling this out in future but now is not the time. If he pushes back, say 'that's my decision. Please try and see this from my point of view. Our relationship is still extremely new due to circumstances out of my control. I am happy to get to know you slowly if you can respect my decisions'. If he can't, then distance yourself.

Your mum is a separate issue. How old are you? If you're an adult, could you work towards moving out, even if into a shared house? You will feel so much better without her undermining you.

I didn't know if you meant staying with permanently or temporarily. If temporarily, just leave and go home.

You tell your Dad you don't want to go visiting with him.

If your mum is being a dick to you then you're absolutely entitled to leave and go home.

If you havent seen this man since you were a baby, he isnt your dad. He is a guy who had sex with your mum, nothing else. I would 100% not be going to spend anytime with this mans family.