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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be please that an openly gay footballer

66 replies

Henuinequest · 28/11/2022 07:58

Has won I’m a celeb? Particularly with all the controversy over the World Cup in Qatar …
she seems lovely and genuine too…

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Henuinequest · 28/11/2022 11:59

‘I used to hang out with a lot of women footballers back in the early 2000s. Some of the shit they used to get with horrific by the press and on the pitch from "fans".’

yup, Alex Scott was with a team mate for EIGHT years, and only now has mentioned the relationship. Now that she’s retired from football and is a tv pundit.

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NamelessTemptress01 · 28/11/2022 12:07

Thanks for the spoiler 🙄

burnoutbabe · 28/11/2022 12:09

Beeboppy · 28/11/2022 08:42

Gosh I think people are getting a bit het up here! I read this to be more ‘it’s great she won, the sexuality isn’t relevant’. On the sexuality aspect the
point being, ‘it’s great she didn’t lose because of this’.

I also think its great a lesbian woman won a reality tv show as it's not happened before in the UK as far as i can tell - plenty of gay men, but not gay women.

it shoudn't be A THING but its good it has happened.

Henuinequest · 28/11/2022 12:11

‘Thanks for the spoiler 🙄’

oh shush. The day after one of the biggest reality show? It’s EVERYWHERE.

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DrMarciaFieldstone · 28/11/2022 12:18

NamelessTemptress01 · 28/11/2022 12:07

Thanks for the spoiler 🙄

Jesus 🤣

Have you looked anywhere on the internet today?

Lostatseawithnolighthouse · 28/11/2022 12:20

Henuinequest · 28/11/2022 12:11

‘Thanks for the spoiler 🙄’

oh shush. The day after one of the biggest reality show? It’s EVERYWHERE.

Not too much to ask for a spoiler alert though is it. I haven't watched it yet either. No point now.

Colacoco · 28/11/2022 12:55

Excuse the roughness....
It took me 5 min on both twitter than facebook to find lots of homophobic messages about jill and lots more disparaging her looks. I think we have a tendency to think that "I dont care about her being gay" means that no one does.
I know people who said they felt uncomfortable with her reunion with her partner on the bridge for example

Id love to believe that society was at a point where people werent homophobic but sadly i know us to be a long way off yet
The following were seen i 5 min on facebook and twitter and on main feeds like responses to news stories etc that are meant to be moderated. All different people too. I didnt include many more of the sick faces, comments about her not possibly winning on merit, or being gay because no man would fancy her.

To be please that an openly gay footballer
NamelessTemptress01 · 28/11/2022 12:56

No I’ve been avoiding it until I’ve watched it, thought I was safe on AIBU

limitedperiodonly · 28/11/2022 13:57

I don’t think it’s necessarily helpful to compare directly to the mens game otherwise we fall into the same trap of harmful tropes. There are plenty of positives about the men’s game too. I don’t need to lift up the female game by pulling the men’s game down.

Exactly @ExhaustedFlamingo. It bores my tits off. Similarly, when people trot out that if women ruled the world there would be no more wars and we'd all get things sorted over tea and and cakes at a spa weekend my mind always skips to Margaret Thatcher, Golda Meir, Indira Gandhi, Catherine The Great, Elizabeth I and others I have forgotten. There haven't been as many female rulers as men in history but those that existed weren't exactly backwards in coming forwards when it came to asserting themselves with armies.

I think a measure of women's equality will be when we are allowed to be as nasty, venal and petty as men - particularly by other women who don't do their sisters any favours by holding them to higher standards and indulging in fantasies about how nice women are.

Scott herself was involved in a notably aggressive clash off the ball with a rival player on her way to England winning the Women's Euros this summer. I forget which nation it was or whether either woman was booked, but it wasn't what you'd call a nurturing encounter. They certainly cared about it though and I think Scott was in the right because I was supporting England and emotions run high in football, women's or men's..

That said, I would hope that people of either sex were decent human beings. But to repeat, I dearly wish for the day when women weren't held to higher standards than men especially by other women.

Willmafrockfit · 28/11/2022 14:13

i have just found out her nickname is Crouchie, after Peter Crouch!

limitedperiodonly · 28/11/2022 14:15

Women’s football also differs from mens in that the England team actually win…

@Henuinequest not quite. England women's football differs from England men's football in that the women won this year's Euros. The England women were better than their opponents in the final, the Germany women. They were both better than all the other women's teams they beat.

But like England's men in 1966, England's women might never win a major tournament in 56 years and counting. Would you say they were no good and stop admiring individual performances and hoping for the team or like a grown up accept that other teams were better than them?

I stopped saying boys were stinky and girls were best when I was about nine.

limitedperiodonly · 28/11/2022 14:32

@Henuinequest Sorry. That didn't come over properly. Girls are not better than boys though we are frequently told it's the other way around.

I agree with you that the fact that Jill Scott won a mainstream reality show like IACGMOOH while being openly lesbian and even discussing it and embracing her fiancee at the end is definitely A GOOD THING.It would not have happened in perhaps as recently as 10 years ago when Britain were celebrating the London Olympics and I cant think of any openly lesbian or gay athletes.

Saying it shouldn't matter reminds me of the people who insist they see no colour when racism is discussed and end by saying they don't care is someone is blue with pink spots. That is clearly ridiculous as that colouration doesn't occur in humans or any other creature so you can just bin that person's opinion..

Jill Scott is a worthy winner because she was a team player and thoroughly nice person which is not the same as saying she's nice all the time. No one is and we shouldn't be held to that impossible standard.

Henuinequest · 28/11/2022 15:10

‘don’t need to lift up the female game by pulling the men’s game down.’

plenty of people would argue that the mens gamenis already in the gutter, and they got their without any help from anyone else.

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Henuinequest · 28/11/2022 16:16

‘Not too much to ask for a spoiler alert though is it. I haven't watched it yet either. No point now.’

really?? I mean, really?? 🤣

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Lostatseawithnolighthouse · 29/11/2022 12:53

Henuinequest · 28/11/2022 16:16

‘Not too much to ask for a spoiler alert though is it. I haven't watched it yet either. No point now.’

really?? I mean, really?? 🤣

Yes really. No need to be such a tit about it.

Henuinequest · 29/11/2022 16:02

@Lostatseawithnolighthouse I dunno, I feel like if I was really into a big show I would prob watch the finale or record and watch it before touching the internet… not sure how you could avoid finding out the ending…

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