to ask if you have some secret weapon against cystitis after sex?

[stingyburnyfuck]

i mean this nicely but please please don’t come here just to tell me to wee after sex or drink cranberry juice. We are way past that.

I am absolutely desperate. Feel like I’ve tried EVERYTHING. I’ve posted in the past under another name I think and received some good advice but I’m back again. Is there ANYTHING you do to fight cystitis that I haven’t tried?? Anything? Please!

I have suffered my entire adult life, 25 years since I started having sex, with recurrent cystitis after sex. It starts 3-5 days after the sex and nothing gets rid of it until I take a full course of antibiotics.

I’ve seen specialists and am currently under the care of the private Malone-Lee urology clinic in London. Their treatment is long term antibiotics. I’ve been under them three years and spent an absolute fortune that I cannot sustain. It was life changing to be able to have a normal sex life with DH without being in agony days later. But they recently took me off the ABs to see how it goes - we’ve had sex twice - both times I have got cystitis and ended up on a course of ABs anyway. So I just don’t think it’s the long term solution and I can’t stay on ABs forever, can I?!

I’ve tried:
*Thrush and BV treatment
*One antibiotic every time I have sex (worked 90% of the time but again is that a long term solution?)
*D-mannose and cranberry - do nothing
*Urethral stretch and had camera up there
*Always wash and wee directly before and after sex
*No perfumed products or soap near vulva
*Drink shit load of water daily and limited caffeine
*Probiotics

Dipstick and lab tests nearly always clear (I know theory of these being unreliable) and I’ve had every swab imaginable and they’re always clear too so I don’t think it’s thrush or an infection.

the only thing I haven’t really done is change my diet because it’s only ever sex that triggers it - if I go months without sex I don’t have a twinge, no matter what I eat/drink.

feel fucking miserable and like I either give up sex or suffer forever.

Ummm. If finger penetration doesn’t cause cystitis it’s something unique to the PIV that isn’t impacted by hygiene so physical. It sounds like your urethra is being irritated specifically by PIV.

Husband’s pubic hair?

@stingyburnyfuck how are you getting on - did the suggestions help?

Hygiene is key factor to avoid UTIs.

My GP told me the reason for UTIs after sex is because the motion and friction involved in sex moves bacteria from your bottom area to your urethra and then bam - infection!

Shower before sex (and after too if you want) and wash your bottom really well. Also after you go for a number 2 wash your bottom if you are at home and can. If your out use wet wipes and get it as clean as you can. It’s the bacteria from poo that causes UTI. And when you think about it dry tissue paper is never going to remove bacteria so it’s just going to sit on your skin waiting for opportunity to get into your urethra…

My GP said if every woman did this she would rarely have to hand out antibiotics.

Also get your hubby to shower and wash his bits before sex too, under his foreskin too because men are gross sometimes and neglect themselves

And cranberry juice - drink one cup every day as prevention.

But most important thing is HYGIENE

Thanks for checking in @TrevorOptions. not really unfortunately. I’m back on antibiotics for the time being. Still researching and looking into things helpfully suggested here but so far drawing a blank.

@pearlearringgirl apprwxiate you are trying to help. None of what you say is new to me - I do all that already as it says in my OP. But hopefully will help others

Sorry you are still suffering, it's horrible & debilitating. Ive recently had a UTI that subsided only to return. Thanks to one of the posters on here I did the stop/start pee thing plus copious water & it went. I was researching something else & stumbled across stuff about e.coli, the usual culprit, these have feeler hooks that embed in our bladders activated by proteins that detect our urine is being expelled. No wonder uti's can be so hard to eradicate! I hope you manage to get it sorted @stingyburnyfuck

I'm in the same boat. Lying here prone, one leg on back of couch, other turned opposite. The pain is so intense and it's concentrated in one tiny point (my urethra). Just want air, cool. Anything to take the pain away down there. So while I lie here waiting for my ibuprofen and antibiotics to kick in...my personal journey:

Like OP I've had every test imaginable, all come back clear, just inflammation (some showed traces of protein or blood, one had so much blood they couldn't read it).

I've had the camera up the urethra and all it showed was inflammation (you think?!). No abnormalities, just scar tissue, shock.

And it's always after sex - or, and here is my little addition - stress. If I'm worried, upset or being bullied, back it comes.
(Luckily I left that job and am not being bullied anymore, but just wanted to add in case anyone else goes through it.)

We use loads of lube, clean before and after, but I find certain positions impossible and also the length of time matters (if it goes on longer than a few minutes I know I'm in trouble). And of course all that messes up your sex life because you're always tense, and dreading it.

I've tried all the other remedies, and honestly if someone else mentions cranberry juice...

I've suffered with this since my 20s, now 57.
The good/bad thing is, until reading this post I thought I was the anomaly. The sad thing is, there are so many women suffering, I wish it was better researched and acknowledged.

Sounds really miserable @Julesgelden
All that prodding and probing, my sympathies 😕. Do antibiotics clear it up eventually (ready for the next onslaught)?

I am wondering if this is what I get. Awful pelvic pain for 2-3 days after sex…

Op,but drink lemon water. The fake stuff you put on pancakes. Gives me relief with an hour if getting it. Best thing I've ever tried

@stingyburnyfuck stingyburnyfuck · 04/01/2023 15:40

Thanks for checking in @TrevorOptions. not really unfortunately. I’m back on antibiotics for the time being. Still researching and looking into things helpfully suggested here but so far drawing a blank.

sorry to hear you are still suffering. I've not seen your thread before.

Just wanted to ask - sorry if you've answered this before as have skim read this thread - but have you tried completely eliminating all saliva from contact with sex organs for both of you during and in the lead up to sex.

so no blow jobs, no him going down on you and no using spit as a lubricant?

Ask as had a friend who had recurrent UTIs but only after cunnilingus - it was solved after they stopped.

I think it is called Mannosium take 4 gr

Yes, if I start on antibiotics it clears within a day. Unless I'm hopeful (like bury my head in the sand hopeful). When I'm hopeful I pretend it's not happening, but I'm always wrong - and so today I didn’t mess about, I just took one and I can say right now I feel a lot better...

Thanks, but... Had it. Cost a lot. Doesn't work for me.

https://uqora.com/
Im not in the UK and regulatly see this advertised on TV

Thanks for this thread op. I have had three bouts of visible blood in urine and other symptoms. They seem to f ge et better with antibiotics abut come back when I stop. I have been given a two week urology referral and am hoping that might reassure me it’s ‘only’ infection and not the worse scenarios I am very good at imagining! My first bout was triggered by sex. I have read the thread carefully and will try some of the things mentioned. Did anyone else have visible blood in their urine-mine is on the toilet roll when I wipe but doesn’t show up on dipsticks.

D mannose, i have a lot of sex and older so hormonal changes can lead to increased risk of UTIs. It works brilliantly