Telling her not to let her child touch all the food?

[aaronslands]

I'm currently on holiday and this morning went down for breakfast
It's a buffet breakfast.
I'm stood behind a lady and her daughter (probably 6 ) and she's walking around touching the sausages then she touched the bacon
The mum is saying "oh do you want that?"
The daughter says no and she walks on (leaving the food she touched )
After the 5th time she did it
I said "excuse me ,I don't mean to sound rude but it's not very hygienic to let her touch food if she's not going to put it on her plate-it's a bit off putting for other people"

She looked at me -said nothing and kept walking

Was I in the wrong?

I can never understand parents who don't just tell their kids the dos and don'ts in these situations. Ok the child maybe hadn't been to a buffet before. So why on earth does the parent not just say, don't touch the food! A 3 year old can understand this!

And after the very first time, she should have told her daughter not to touch. I have no idea how this is not the default thing to do! Some people are just totally mannerless! And quite frankly thoughtless. They must live in their own little bubble.

Her daughter is probably that kid who always charges around a restuarant while the parent pathetically says things like, 'sit down darling', 'use your words darling', while the kid takes zero notice at all.

You were being unreasonable in being so polite.
“I don’t mean to sound rude” is bordering on simpering.
I’d have absolutely blasted her with a “quit touching everyone’s food you rude brat! Control your child or fuck off from here” but then I’m old enough to no longer care about upsetting people like that.

Some parents don't seem to understand that part of parenting involves setting boundaries, guiding towards and modelling good behaviour, and sometimes saying no and meaning it.

You weren’t in the wrong at all! I have a 7 year old with some additional needs and she would get a very stern telling off if she did this. If she can understand, so can most children. And even if they can’t, it is the ‘parent’’s job to ensure that it doesn’t happen!

You'd think that grim food other people have touched could have been banished forever after the Covid restrictions were lifted! That and neck breathers in the supermarket-I'd have happily kept the 2m spacing at checkouts.

Was I in the wrong?

no, the mother could have reminded her daughter not to touch the food with her fingers - you did that instead. You were not passive aggressive which many people are in this types of situations, well done for helping

Wow. Animal. I wouldn't even do that in my own home, I'd use utensils.

Ignore the parents then and just say, firmly, "don't touch the food with your hands"

Not acceptable. However - buffets can be bewildering places, especially when busy. It's not always easy to keep kids in check, especially if you've had a bad night's sleep. I can see how one slip could happen, not five tho.

Probably the same parents who allow their kids to pile their plates with food that goes uneaten. Drives me mad.
You might have been better off telling the staff though and letting them deal with it - it'll be Sod's law you'll bump into that family everywhere now.
Hope you don't though! Have a nice hols.

I'd have been far less polite than you OP. Grim.

During the height of Covid I’ve found hotels totally happy to serve my order directly from the kitchen to avoid the buffet and lots of hotels that used to have buffets have stopped them. Also prevents waste from people piling their plate high and not eating it and people making packed lunch from breakfast items.

You did absolutely the right thing, OP.

You were a bit simpering. Why???

I'd have just told the child directly. But I grew up in the 70's/89's where people had the 'takes a village' mentality not the 'how dare you even look at my child' attitude.

You were right, and good on my you speaking of up.

No, you wouldn’t have.

Yuck! Some parents are just pathetic.

Reminds me of the man in charge of an ice cream stall in Borough Market over the summer who we had to tell that he couldn't sample all of the ice creams in between customers using the same spoon

I've now seen 2 posters say they witnessed someone serving themselves salad with their bare hands. Can anyone explain this to me? If you've done this, why? I really can't understand someone thinking that this was ok, unless this was their first day above the ground

YANBU. Next time say it loud and clear so staff might hear it and intervene. Or ask staff to take the food the child has been fingering of the buffet.

I've seen this many times! Including M&S and Sainsbury's in the bakery sections... for that reason I never buy unwrapped bread or rolls or (god forbid!) pastries. Saw a child actually licking a pastry once.

You are definitely not wrong. Some people have got no common sense. (The parent letting her do it)

You definitely weren’t being unreasonable. From what you’ve said, it’s totally the parent’s fault, who didn’t seem to give a shit that their child was touching all the food.

It’s unhygienic and rude. Next time maybe explain simply and kindly to the child. Sometimes the parents are a lost hope.

@OhYouSillySod er, yes I would, but as you don’t know me I don’t blame you for accusing me of lying. I’m brutally honest, I fall out with folk because I don’t sugar the pill, I don’t care if they like it or not.
Im 60, I don’t care if I piss people or their brats off.

Strange attitude, but sure. I don’t particularly see the need to go through life so aggressively, but each to their own.