Hi,
Divorced 6+ yrs. ExH a controlling twat. Since youngest DC started Secondary school in Sept they (the child) asked not to go overnight on a Tues as they used to, until they were settled at big school (homework, new bus etc).
They asked Dad for another night, can they go on Fridays instead. He refused initially, as it was 'his night out', but DC came back on Monday after the EOW and said last night 'Dad's picking me up from here on Fri after work'.
Last year he tried the same trick, so I had to pay for after school care but he contacted the CMS and dropped the amount by 7% as he had 'an overnight'. Literally 5:30pm - 8am, and the DC don't have hot water in the taps as Dad says it's too expensive!! (He bought mortgage free, higher rate tax payer etc).
Anyway, I stuck him out, said it's straight after school or nothing, he managed the straight after school, he was abusive to me, called me names, generally foul and difficult.
I've sent him a message this morning to say, no, like last year, if the DC are overnight, it is straight after school. He's bringing DC back at 8:30am on Saturday morning anyway (child said 'Dad said half past eight not eight so they (DC) can have a bit of a lie-in'). Isn't dad kind!
Now the abusive texts, I'm being awkward, I need help etc etc.
IANotBU - overnights begin after school, ExH should make this work somehow
IABU - child should come home to yours for tea, shower, change so ExH can collect after work
For context, the school bus drives past his house, the DC get off there EOW.