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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Weird encounter at work

9 replies

Blueisthecolour1 · 23/11/2022 14:27

Feel a bit puzzled/upset by this. Had a big team meeting earlier this week, it was a long one, so we had a comfort break halfway through. I was walking along the corridor to the cafeteria and as I approached a glass door I saw someone the other side of it who I recognised, a senior colleague in the same field as me but in a different team. She was obviously also at the meeting so I waved/smiled at her through the glass and pressed the button to allow her through.

She recognised me and pulled the most disdainful face - sort of scowled/sneered at me through the glass. Her eyes said it all - she looked at me like a piece of shit on the bottom of her shoe. Then the door opened, and we walked on past each other without a word.

What a strange reaction! I've never had personal/professional dealings with this individual before, just known her in passing. Never been rude to her, don't really know her. Just came away from that encounter thinking "wow." The look on her face was priceless - it spoke volumes. Don't speak to me, don't wave at me, Just Don't.

I've tried to comfort myself since by thinking it says more about her, but honestly I can't shake the absolute look of disgust on her face when she recognised me! I know I shouldn't give it a second thought but what a strange reaction, to someone who has only ever been friendly/polite to you.

Has anyone else had experience of a similar encounter at work? What did you do? I think I'll just avoid said person in the future. Everyone else at the meeting was lovely and chatty. Which kind of made it worse in some ways.

OP posts:
BranstonTickle · 23/11/2022 14:29

Could she have thought you were someone else? Not that she should do that to anyone, but might lessen your upset if it's not personal to you. It's not acceptable behaviour at work, either way. Hope you're okay, how unsettling for you.

BarkHorse · 23/11/2022 20:44

I pull faces a lot. Usually when I’m remembering something that happened like 12 years ago or something. Or I see my own reflection - it may have been something like that.

Kate0902900908 · 06/03/2023 23:53

I did this exact same thing! I was that deep it thought and just didn’t even for a second notice my work friend was even there and she said to me later in the week wtf and I was like I didn’t even see you….she said it was like a hated her… it took her 2 days to approach me (I admittedly was thinking she must have a lot on she’s not been over)

DysmalRadius · 07/03/2023 00:12

It's a very strong reaction to have to your interpretation of someone's facial expression. There are so many reasons that she might have made that face - suddenly feeling ill. remembering something she hadn't done, realising she'd left her car unlocked, catching sight of her own reflection, just so many ways to arrange her face that are nothing to do with how she feels about you. I wouldn't give it another thought unless she starts being actively unpleasant towards you.

user1471554720 · 14/04/2023 22:12

She may have thought you were over the top waving and smiling at her if you just knew her in passing. I don't know. She may expect you to give a low key hello in acknowledgement. Sorry this happened.

EsmeT · 15/04/2023 08:15

I have encountered this at work many times. I am polite but generally keep myself to myself.

Isiteveningyet · 15/04/2023 08:18

She may have been thinking about something or someone else. And as you don’t actually know this woman and never have dealings with her it is feasible she didn’t even recognise you. Plus it’s a bit OTT smiling and waving at her.

norma1980 · 15/04/2023 08:26

Did she definitely recognise you? She may've seen you and been trying to place you and then couldn't and so didn't speak (perhaps thinking you'd also mistaken she she was)?

MushMonster · 15/04/2023 08:32

Yes, as above, it may have nothing to do woth you and she even did not recognise you.
And, in the case she did, maybe she applied for a role you got or a project you got. It cannot be personal if you havecnot interacted much with her.
Just forget about it.

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