To dread being a bridesmaid aged 47

[Chococrimbo]

Just that really. A good friend getting married who is having the whole shebang, hundreds of people , 2 day event, matching dressing gowns, dresses etc.
I dread the idea of it, I really feel I am done with that whole dressing up to the nines and being at the centre of events. I know I have to suck it up but is it unreasonable to dread the whole thing

Well said.

I think I'd mostly object to the being forced into a bridesmaid dress part.

Being a bridesmaid but wearing what you want (within reason) would be more suitable I think.

But it's done now. Maybe agree you will change after the dinner for evening party?

I was a bridesmaid once, when I was 4. The bride was my godmother's daughter. The bride had been my mother's only bridesmaid 5 years earlier.
The wedding was held on a Bank Holiday Saturday in August, in the church, where the bride's father was the vicar. The reception was held at the vicarage (large, Georgian house with 2 staircases).
I had a lovely, gold dress with a sash and a floral headband. I didn't have any flowers because I had to carry the bride's 100 year old lace veil down the aisle and then hold her bouquet during the service.
It was a wonderful day (except that my mother wouldn't let me have any champagne) and the house in question was featured in 4 Weddings and a Funeral.
In my view you might have one older bridesmaid, but any others should be young. I had 2 bridesmaids, who were my nieces, and 1 matron of honour, who was their mother (my sister) and had never been a "bridesmaid".

I'm fifty bloody five and going on a Hen do at the weekend! ☹️
When my friend first started talking about it we were going for a meal and drinks in the next big city - lovely!

All of a sudden we're in another big city, further away, big night out & staying in an an Air BnB with a load of other women I don't know!
I'm dreading it!

I love my friend, I know I'll enjoy myself when I actually get there but I just want to sleep in my own bed at the end of the day!

Sometimes you just have to suck it up but you have my sympathy!

Like that matters these days. Few bridesmaids are “maids”. Cohabitation would rule you out too.