…to think it’s a bit tight & embarrassing to haggle on some things?

[NellesVilla]

Hello all,

I was due to cat and dog sit over Xmas for about 3 x weeks. It had been booked since last Xmas. I’ve worked for the for years and already offer them a mates’ rate discount- relevant.I was also their nanny several years’ ago whilst at uni.

Last night the family called me to ask for another discount just over 2 weeks’ before the start date, plus asking if I’d contribute to bills for my ‘stay’. Not that it matters but they are loaded, are flying to the states to a v expensive Christmassy city, and will be spending shitloads- they do every year.

So they want a discount on the already crazily reduced bargain rate I give them; money that I need and forms part of my meagre current income. Additionally, they’d like something towards bills- when they have asked me to care for their home and cherished pets.

Wtaf? Is this normal? Do I tell them to take a long walk off a short pier or what?! Please vipers; I need to grow a pair as I find this type of thing- money-orientated issue- challenging at the best of times!!

This

Talk about using a sledgehammer to crack a nut.
They can ask…and you can say no and stick to the original agreement. Don’t think the sacking and blocking was necessary tbh. A polite no would have sufficed.

But see…this is what sometimes happens when people consult Internet forums like Mumsnet. They get all wound up by the strident advice posters enjoy giving from the comfort of their living room, safe in the knowledge that it’s not going to impact on them or indeed, anyone they know.

Agreed, I don’t understand why the OP did that.

At least she was honest when she said she’s a coward.

because they were asking for a discount on a mates rate already offered, they were messing her about with dates & then asked her to contribute to heating and running costs of the house whilst they were away.

All that deserves ditching - complete disrespect for her and the fact she is actually running a business. They seemed to think they were doing her a favour.

This. I’m glad that OP had some self respect.

Agree generally but don’t think the OP did anything extreme here. She just told them it wouldn’t be possible and why and (reasonably) told them she was going to have to cancel. I would no longer have felt comfortable house sitting for them either!

The blocking probably wasn’t needed (or at least could have waited till it was less obvious!) but then the guy did start texting and demanding continued contact immediately after, piling on guilt, etc. so maybe blocking and moving on was the best thing to do. OP’s call.

You honestly don’t need people like that taking up headspace.

Self respect = saying no can do and sticking to current arrangement as already agreed.
Unhinged overreaction = sacking and blocking both of them out of the blue, leaving them fucked for their holiday in a fortnight.

I think OP did the right thing here.

They were going to pay her well under the going rate - £15 per day- and quibble over utilities usage. There's a very good chance the owners would concoct some cock and bill story and OP would have to take them to small claims to get a penny.

Once trust has been broken in an arrangement such as this, cutting your losses is the only sensible thing to do.

That’s just fantasy.
OP says she’s worked for them for years.

Do you really think that would have been the end of it with the CFs? That they would have happily paid OP with no quibbles at the end?

If so, you are very naive. If they are being like this BEFORE they use OP you can be very sure they will cause her problems after she has worked for them and they don't want to pay.

And let’s not forget, she did agree to the original terms almost a year ago when this was booked. She offered them ‘mates rates’ off her own back. She says as much.

All she had to was say, “That’s not possible but I am happy to stick to the original plan.”

Christ.

Again, she says she has worked for them for years. There’s no reason to assume they’d quibble or create at all.

You’ve all wound her up and let her go. Well done. How supportive.

Well I haven't commented on the thread before but I still think the OP has done the right thing. Going forward she knows never to offer mates rates, not dealing with these CFers is a good start.

I always get pissed off when people on here say 'well it never hurts to ask, they can only say no'. Actually sometimes just the asking really annoys people and does hurt and as a result the couple in the OP now have to find other mugs to look after their dogs.

Trying to renegotiate a long held arrangement where you have been given mates rate, two weeks before the start date is vulgar.

The OP was calm and umemotional in her explanation of her position to the wife.

The OP knows these people and from the husbands demands that his wife properly voice her upset, she had every right to not wish to engage further with either of them.

It would serve no purpose to the OP.
She does not owe these people any right of reply.

Some people, often CF's, have great difficulty when faced with boundaries and the consequences of THEIR actions.

The OP no longer wishing to engage with these people further, is simply her asserting her boundary and the consequences of their attempt to take advantage of her.

They played roulette with their booking.
They should have thought of THAT.

I applaud the OP.

But OP has lost nothing by cancelling this arrangement.

If she wanted to replace the meagre lost earnings, she can easily do this by joining rover.com or posting on Facebook to offer her services at double the rate she was being offered.Staying for £15 a day with the worry that some of that would be claimed back for utilities is really not worth it.

But that is my point - she has worked for them for years, and NOW they are starting to quibble. So she is right to stop it now.

So this is the start of the problems they will create her, not the end of it. In 6 months time if OP had allowed them to dictate her own terms, and does an AIBU about them continually taking advantage, I am sure people would say "why did you let them underpay you in the first place - get a backbone"

Try doing that to a tradesman- by the way we need you to knock another 20% off your bill, come round Thursday instead of Monday as we only need one bathroom installed instead of 2, and we will charge you £1 for every cup of tea we make you.

They will quickly tell you to get f**ked, never to se seen again.

Absolutely agree. They were totally taking advantage of OP.

I think the OP has done herself a favour. Purely from a business perspective, she can now give her services to someone who will pay properly and not dick her around. She isn't exactly going to be short of pet-sitting work over Christmas, and frankly, why on earth should she worry about letting these people down? They are clearly too used to getting their own way and have little regard for others needs and circumstances. The absolute cheek of asking the sitter to contribute to their household bills!

So, not an unhinged overreaction in my opinion. A proportionate reaction to being messed around, disrespected, and left unsure as to whether the income she had been promised would actually materialise.

You did the right thing OP. By the time they had knocked down your mate's rates, deducted the days that the neighbours wanted to look after the dogs and charged you for utilities you would have been paying them.

What were they like to nanny for @NellesVilla ?
Did they mess you around when working with them then ?

@pictish , you’re not Mrs Tight-Cheapskate are you?! Does your name begin with E? Your writing style seems familiar!

Fwiw, I didn’t want to mention as this might be slightly outing but this woman has tried to screw over tradesmen before- eg the deal is £8000 for work next week, then on the Friday morning before it’s “Let’s get them down to £7400 as Mrs C is getting it done for £7600 so surely there’s a deal to be done”, that sort of things. Chancers basically.

And when I first babysat for them (admittedly got cash), the bill was say, £29.50 and she got funny when I didn’t have 50p change on me. They’re loaded ffs.

For anyone that’s interested, I’ve secured another temp Xmas role!