Find colleagues attitude really irritating?

[waitingindepartures]

As our job role we can choose to gain an extra qualification, the equivalent of a degree.

Colleague (who failed and gave up on it a few years ago) calls me sad if I mention I have revision to do. Weekend before one exam she couldn’t believe I was going to study. This is only response to her saying what are you doing tonight/this weekend. I know ever now.

I’ve now completed stage 1 of 3 and I’m not sure I want to continue. I mentioned this when she asked me and was told oh no you should definitely carry it on, almost in a guilt trip way.

Its 600 hours worth of study. Alongside a full time job, all I do is work and study and life is not fun. It’s so much and the fact she quit after she failed one exam and seems to think she should give input is laughable.

Don’t mention revision etc to her

600 hours of study for the whole qualification or the next stage or next year? I found 120 hours of study alongside full time work tough.

Ignore your colleague. Do you want the qualification and do you enjoy the subject? If you can answer yes to those questions then carry on.

Ignore her, don’t mention it if possible and don’t solicit her opinion. You may be right that she feels a bit insecure about not having completed it herself, but that’s her issue.

Like I said in the OP I’ve learnt from it now.

I suppose I just don’t get the contrast, I’m either sad because I’m revising (either after work or at a weekend so no idea when it wouldn’t be sad to do so)

Or she tells me I should continue doing it. Despite her not knowing how much hard work is actually is.

You mention it all to her, dont do that now if she hasn't got anything sensible to say. Generally other people are aggravating and you have to pick and choose how you relate to them.

It's a little insensitive to talk to her about the qualification as she failed.

I would avoid it as a topic of conversation with her.

You're the one talking about it.
If you don't want her to answer, then don't.

It's clearly a sore spot for her that she stopped doing it. Maybe you could be a bit more sensitive and not mention it around her, is there really any need?

I agree with the others - you're the one who talks about it. Just stop.

It sounds to me like she wishes she had done it, but at the same time she can’t fathom prioritising it over more immediate feel-good activities (which is probably why she didn’t complete it!).

So when you’re doing the revising etc. she’s putting herself in that position and thinking “God! No!”. But when you’re talking about giving up she’s also putting herself in that position and thinking “I wish I’d been able to stick it out.”

I see why it’s irritating but, of course, you need to put her responses out of mind and make your own decision about whether or not to continue based solely on whether you think the whole thing is worth it for you.

But she asks me what are doing tonight - “nothing much, I’ve got to start revision”.

She failed one exam and completely gave up. There was nothing stopping her from retaking it. Work funds everything. A few of us have failed one before.

If I’ve ever mentioned it then it’s in relation to a question she’s asked. She specifically asked if I had an exam in December and would I do the next level. Should I lie? Because apparently I’m horrible answering a question truthfully.

That makes perfect sense tbh.

Fair enough to find it irritating but her comments shouldn't be affecting your decision whether or not to continue or not.

If it's equivalent to a degree then that's equivalent to 320 credits so 3200 hours of study. So 600 doesn't sound too bad for the level of qualification you're getting!

Appreciate its hard - I'm doing a diploma alongside working at the moment, it's not a huge time commitment, but trying to find anytime around work and family life is a real struggle.

Just put her out of your mind when you're making your decision though.

I wouldn't lie. Just manage the conversation away from the qualification quickly.

I would also make the decision to stop being irritated by this.

Have a look and see if that 600 hours includes work placement allocation, OP. If so, it might not be so bad after all.

Have a word with your tutor, too, to see if there’s options around time management.

In my experience, I wish I had taken up the degree offered in a previous job. I’ve missed out on a lot of opportunities and roles since due to not having it. Now, I would grab that chance and do it regardless. Short term pain, long term gain!