To think this dog breeder was rude?

[Shameus]

It’s becoming impossible to find an ethical dog breeder that is genuinely interested in preserving the breed and educating people about that breed.

Please don’t get on at me about rescue dogs, I’ve done my fair share with rescues and now I want a “blank canvas puppy” for various reasons.

So, messaged a breeder yesterday who’s website said to contact them for any info as they can talk about the breed 24/7. So I contacted them, told them a bit about myself and asked a few questions about breed traits - trying to work out if the breed is right for us. I received a reply saying “go to dog shows, you’ll get loads of info there”. And that was it!! So I replied again and told them what I was looking for in a dog and asked if they would recommend this breed to someone looking for these traits. They replied “You get what you put in, it’s common sense”. Wtf??

Surely someone with a genuine interest in preserving their breed would want to answer questions and “interview” potential customers? So I’ve given up on them.

Same thing happened with another breeder I contacted. I sent a long email telling them about myself and asking for info on the breed and received an email back saying “we have pups available now, ready in 4 weeks. When would you like to view them? Deposit guarantees pup”. So I replied and said I wasn’t ready to get a puppy yet, im researching whether this breed is right for us … they never replied.

Is it me or what?? Am I expecting too much?

We got a puppy earlier this year. I did loads of internet research and then joined breed specific Facebook groups and asked questions and also got a recommendation of a breeder from someone in the group who then I contacted once I was sure..

YABU to expect your first point of call to be breeder to decide if they're the right breed for you.

Oh I was interested in their pups but I assumed they would have waiting lists so wouldn’t readily have pups available. I assumed it was a long process between contacting a breeder and actually getting a pup.

Im starting to see it from their side now though so glad I asked on here.

You need tondo your own research before you even approach a breeder !

We are very big on dogs in our family and have had many over the years. We have always done our research on each breed before we have contacted any one else, to see if the breed is right for us and our lifestyle. There is so much info on line and also usually many online groups to join for each breed where there are other owners of the breed.

When viewing a pup we have always asked questions but our questions are usually about the pups in front of us in particular and what their personalities have been like among the litter to help make our choice of which pup. Of course we have spoken about the breed when face to face but that’s with our researched knowledge as well not just asking the breeder all about the breed and we know nothing.

A good breeder will answer questions yes but you also need to do a lot of your own research first as well.

I think most of your eplies so far have been from breeders! As the DIL of a breeder having been round her and her breeder friends for 30 years they are only interested in the money. Lots of in breeding using other dogs papers to register. I would never be a breeder as there are too many unwanted animals out there but if I was, because I love animals so much, at around £2k a pup you are the type of person I would want to have one of my pups.

Go to Facebook type in the door breed you are after join the group abd ask your questions. Read the previous posts too as they give you good ideas of general life with that breed.

I think most of your eplies so far have been from breeders!

What an odd assumption.

I don't even own a dog, let alone breed them.

I see you’re new here OP, so just a heads up - this isn’t how AIBU works

Youre meant to ask IABU, then when people say yes, you argue until you’re blue in the face that you mostly definitely are not wrong. Usually then throw out some insults to various posters and finally, flounce off the thread.

Saying you’re taking peoples comments on board and agreeing you might have been a bit unreasonable within the first page isn’t really the done thing.

HTH.

Just from word of mouth and seeing pups advertised, demand seems to have fallen massively and some breeders who used to have waiting lists are now advertising pups, sometimes for weeks before reducing prices and offering payment plans etc. I think the covid puppy boom is over and I dread to think what will happen once these dogs stop making the breeders money 😭

Where did you find the breeders?
In my experience, breeders are more than happy to talk about temperament and suitability.
They will want you to have done your own research too but they want to make sure you know what you're getting into and that you're right for the dog too.

Any breeder that will accept a deposit with no discussion and without meeting you isn't a good breeder and they don't give a shit about where their dogs go.

You were quite right to think that about the waiting lists as the very best dogs and breeders do have long waiting lists.

We waited almost 2 years before the breeder had a pup become available and it would have been longer than that had we not been lifelong Border Collie owners and not had a reference about our suitability from another breeder.

The good ones are very fussy (quite rightly) about who they allow their pups to go to.

By the sounds of it the first one that you contacted was just that and the second one no one near as diligent.

One other thing, the best breeders will never mention a price until they are seriously considering you as they assume that you have done enough research to know their pups value.

I think she's absolutely right.

The more breeders you talk to, the more you will get a feel for the breed. You will get conflicting information/advice, for sure, which will you will have to weigh up for yourself, but you will come away far, far better informed than you would from a conversation with just one or two breeders.

Most importantly, you will get to see dogs in the flesh. You will see the lines of breeding you like best, you will get a feel for the temperament of the different lines, you will get warts and all information from the people who know the breed best and you will be able to network. When you've decided which line you like best, you can put your name down for a puppy.

Get tickets for Crufts on the day that your favoured breed is showing. When you get there, go round the Discover Dogs stands and find the stand for your breed. They are run by the breed clubs and you will find very knowledgable people to talk to. Ask about grooming, feeding, temperament, exercise, health problems etc.

Later in the day, take a wander to the ring where your breed is being shown. The breeders, handlers and dogs will be based on the benches in the general vicinity of that ring (actually, if it's a Basset hound you fancy, just follow the howling, you'll hear them the minute you get through the door). This is your chance to chat directly to breeders. Make sure they've finished showing for the day, tell them you're interested in getting one, and just chat. Breeders love to talk about their breed (as long as they're not getting ready to go in the ring).

Each breed club has its own show, too. That might be an option if you find the idea of Crifts too daunting. You should be able to find details online, if not the Kennel Club should be able to give you details.

I went to Crufts twice and the relevant breed club show before I decided which breeders I would really like a puppy from. It's really worth putting in the effort to get the right dog.

And don't get a dog from a breeder that doesn't ask loads of questions about why you want that breed and your own circumstances. Any responsible breeder will, and you don't want a dog from a breeder that's irresponsible.

I second what @Enko said, we knew our dogs were getting older and I researched other breeds by joining Facebook groups, usually ones you have to answer questions to join and then read the posts. I was put off 3 different breeds by doing this - the characteristics were things I wouldn’t want to live with which I wouldn’t have realised were such strong traits.

😂😂

ok - how dare you all say I’m wrong! Everything I did was perfect and reasonable, you all know nothing about dogs! I’m leaving this thread now and I’m off to hassle more breeders.

Goodbye amateurs!

(is that better? 😁)

😂 And AIBU is back to normal...

Excellent flounce, well done! 😂

And thus the balance was restored 🤣

Join breed based Facebook groups and online forums you’ll get a much better feel than as you said a basic google of traits of collies. There will also be lots of breeders and even breed rescues on there.

some breeders are just mardy though but all will expect you to know about the breed and be asking questions about their dogs their lines not general.

You have proved your newbie status OP by not arguing the toss with every poster. 😂

You excellently flounced waaaaaaay too soon! 😂

I'm surprised at these responses. Any reputable breeder would probably bore your ear off talking about the merits of their dogs! Sure you can do a lot of research beforehand, but they should also be able to answer a few questions, even if just in the interest of making a sale! Neither of those breeders seem to be capable of even that so move on.

Breed dogs are tricky, an ethical breeder might not want to encourage a complete novice?

Excellent AIBU skills OP, you'll fit right in!

If you go in saying you're interested in the breed, and asking for info about the mum and dad, you will probably get a different response. You don't have to commit to just one breed, you can look at several.

We had phone calls or video calls before meeting in person, which was helpful and saved both sides a lot of time.

I agree you need to do your own research first. When we went looking for a dog we spent months reading into different breeds and traits etc. The thing is- they aren't wrong in what they are saying- you do get out what you put in, however different breeds will have different personality traits/prey drives/tendencies so while for example a bully breed gets a bad rep they can be super loving wee dogs, but you will always be training against an impulsive nature and need to be on it 100% of the time. So you'll find mixed reports on Google for that reason. My advice is to research until you narrow it down to a couple of breeds that you think might be a good fit for your home and lifestyle then maybe get some books specific to those breeds which will give you more specific info. Things to consider are temperament/health conditions/prey drive/ energy levels/associated costs like how much they eat and need groomed etc.

When speaking to a breeder trust your gut. Never give money for a pup you haven't seen in real life and make sure you see mum and ideally dad in real life and where the pups are being kept. You can find lists of questions to ask breeders online. Good things to watch out for is how many litters mum has had and how old she is and what follow up support will they offer as a breeder eg. If it turns out dog is unwell. If you get a whiff of puppy farm or anything unethical run a mile, anyone reputable should be kc registered and have proof of vets visits for the pups and won't let them go before at least 8 weeks. They'll want to interview you when you're visiting the pup but they probably get a lot of enquiries so won't give you much before then and if you go armed with the right questions as well then they'll know you're expecting the right things from them too.

There's breed specific groups on Facebook too. What I read online about my pup is polar opposite of what others real life experiences were...

Yeah, it's a nice start and you show plenty of promise with the flounce but you need to pace yourself. Ideally you'd manage a few deleted posts amongst an increasing deranged tirade with the flounce waiting for page 5 or 6.