Parental income

[glassdarker]

So, context, just seen 10% pension increase.

At same time I've been talking about doing something jointly with my mum and dad. So as a result we talked about income. My parents worked in manual/ administrative roles, neither went to Uni, but worked hard all their lives. Retired ten years ago, own house and car. I appreciate that many pensioners won't be in that position.

They both have small final salary schemes (one less than 10k, one less than 20k). They both get full state pensions. After normal bills their disposable income is a 2k a month. 2k a month ! I am blown away !

But bloody hell we are both higher rate tax payers and we are counting every penny (though we have a lot of extra spend due to a disabled DC). But AIBU to be a bit shocked by the difference in how we are experiencing the cost of living crisis ? I am glad they are doing OK and we don't need money from them but I am still a bit jaw dropped by this... and fantasy spending even 1/4 of that monthly disposable income !

Our taxes are going up too. You do know that most pensioners are also taxpayers? The only thing we’re getting that isn’t taxable is the winter fuel allowance and I think that should only be paid to pensioners claiming pension credit. Still, the foodbank is always happy when I get mine.

This is why the payments should be means tested. I think anyone should be able to apply by proving their income.

Ok, Im done with this thread now.
But just want to say, some old folks on here (and outside of mumsnet) are so nasty towards younger people. I will keep that in mind next time one of you boomers needs anything. Cheers

Hmm, your input has been much appreciated Lucky. I'm not sure the unpleasantness has been all one way.

It's okay. I won't be asking you for anything.

Also I'm not going to judge all younger people by some of the disdainful and unpleasant posts on here from some.

Earlier on this thread I expressed huge sympathy for those younger and those less fortunate than me. I've also said how I'm using my state pension funds to help those not similarly fortunate (in addition to helping my own kids out from my own savings).
So it's really hard to read generalisations that imply that I along with ever other boomer, a selfish and nasty for 'hoarding' my money and grasping enough to remain in the house that has been my family home for several decades.

I'm praying that I don't need care in years to come, so that my kids benefit from what I'm 'hoarding'.

Don’t worry, our kids will be there if we need anything because they don’t hate people on the basis of their date of birth.

I find it completely bizarre that people blame 'pensioners' for the (any) situation they are in now. Everyone just lives with what is available to them at the time. Pensioners are not responsible for the lack of housing, the government are. Pensioners are not responsible for the triple lock, the government are. Pensioners are not responsible for the price of private housing, the government are.

Every single person on this thread would take advantage of what is available to them at the time they need it. Not one would look at a lovely 4 bed detached home costing less than 80/100k and say 'oh I'm not going to buy it because me doing that now will have an impact on 'the young' in 50yrs time. No one would say to an employer 'oh please, reduce my pension you are too generous and if I accept it I might be doing a great disservice to 'the young' in 50yrs time. And it's ridiculous to think that anyone would. Some older people might not understand how hard it is for our young people right now, or how it became so, but that does not make them responsible for it.

The people to blame are the people we vote for. And since only 43% of 18-45 yr olds voted as opposed to 79% of over 45s it appears that 'the young' need to get off their backsides and vote. Because just moaning about how unfair it all will get you precisely nowhere.

The truth is when you're retired and there's only 2 of you (if you're that lucky) you just don't need a massive 4 bed house. You just don't. Families with kids need them and elderly people struggle to maintain them. So there should be incentives to downsize and tax penalties for those that won't.

The sad truth is that I (luckily) bought my house in 1999 before prices started going crazy for just over 100k. I didn't stop to think about wether it would increase/decrease or how the market might look in 23yrs time. it's now valued at £500k and that means lots of families that can't afford to buy it even if I was going to sell (which I'm not). I could barely afford it at £100k and I'm sure as hell not leaving my home to live in a less salubrious part of town in a shoe box just to satisfy the moaners. My sons are likely to be here a while thanks to the current shitshow government, long hours, low wages, lack of affordable property- thank goodness my mortgage is paid off and I can afford to house and sub them.

I definitely don't BLAME pensioners. I dont think many people do. But I do think things need to be sorted out to make the country fairer. You're right that lack of young people voting is a massive issue and so we definitely need compulsory voting. And we shouldn't be increasing pensions across the board if we have a conscience. PEOPLE matter. Whatever their age. And we should be trying to make everyone's lives better. Not just older people's lives. So wealth should be considered and all benefits including pensions should be means tested. Only those who actually need the help should be getting the stupid unfair triple lock.

To be absolutely clear, I'm not suggesting people should stop getting their pensions. Just the extras when they don't fall into an income / wealth bracket that needs the help. Winter fuel payments? Triple lock? Free prescriptions? Free travel? CoL payments? All this just because of their age NO MATTER WHAT THEIR WEALTH STATUS. Its just bloody wrong.

Actually maybe the free travel makes sense so people are less likely to continue driving when they become unsafe.

You''ll be lucky @Pleasepleasepleaseno. Living where I do, the bus pass is as much use as a chocolate fireguard!

We didn’t get a cost of living payment and my bloke has had free prescriptions for years became he’s diabetic, he got those when he was earning £65k. Like Xing the only use a bus pass is to us is to prove id because there are no buses.

The people to blame are the people we vote for. And since only 43% of 18-45 yr olds voted as opposed to 79% of over 45s it appears that 'the young' need to get off their backsides and vote. Because just moaning about how unfair it all will get you precisely nowhere.

So blame is with the voters too?

I think that some boomers, like me, give any extras that we don’t need to our dc that do.
I really can’t comprehend a comfortably off parent watching their dc struggle.
Both of my adult dc have been told to ask if they need help with energy, childcare fees etc.
And they do ask because they know I mean it.
We’re very lucky to be able to help and the greedy boomer posts on here don’t apply to all of us.

We don’t get state pension yet but I find it bizarre that unless we’re at rock bottom and counting every penny the younger generation will consider us to be parasites for simple reason of living to old age.
What a rotten attitude.

Actually maybe the free travel makes sense so people are less likely to continue driving when they become unsafe.

DH is entitled to free travel, as was his mother, maybe I am too but I don't know what age it kicks in. Free travel is a misnomer depending on your address, no point having it here because public transport is almost extinct so neither dh or his mum even applied. And there will be very many pensioners in the same boat, as well as all those who can't use it because of mobility issues and those wealthy ones who 'wouldn't be seen dead on a bus'.

Me & DH have been together for over 40yrs. In all that time he has never been to a Dr or filled out a prescription. Again, he won't be the only one, there are plenty of elderly who won't see a Dr even if they should. I on the other hand have a chronic lifetime condition that I've had since birth and I've cost the nhs plenty, I've also paid thousands of pounds for prescription charges between the ages of 16-60 and feel a little bit entitled that I can now get my drugs free of charge, it's a small thing but it means I can give that £100 quid a month to my boys.

Conversely, Mrs Smith, you had 4 children who grew up to be contributing members of society, a fireman, a policeman, a teacher and a surgeon, so you get extra points, whereas, Mrs Davis, unfortunately your 2 children are drug addicts who have never worked, but regularly use the ambulance service and the NHS, so we're going to deduct points from you.

How on earth would you even begin to manage this, LOL.

So blame is with the voters too?

If a government know that a demographic is going to vote for them then they are the people they are going to keep happy surely? The Tories are always going to win whilst they are keeping the wealthy happy, and if the wealthy are mostly over 60 then they have an advantage.

If people under the age of 45 want the tories out then they need to vote them out. I've never voted for the tories in my life, but now I'm berated as a 'boomer' (although barely by the skin of my teeth) as being responsible for the tories being in power.

If a government know that a demographic is going to vote for them then they are the people they are going to keep happy surely?

We agree on that, the gov wanted to keep the pensioners sweet.

If people under the age of 45 want the tories out then they need to vote them out.

Soon there won't be there the demographics for that!

I find it completely bizarre that people blame 'pensioners' for the (any) situation they are in now. Everyone just lives with what is available to them at the time. Pensioners are not responsible for the lack of housing, the government are. Pensioners are not responsible for the triple lock, the government are. Pensioners are not responsible for the price of private housing, the government are.

Every single person on this thread would take advantage of what is available to them at the time they need it. Not one would look at a lovely 4 bed detached home costing less than 80/100k and say 'oh I'm not going to buy it because me doing that now will have an impact on 'the young' in 50yrs time. No one would say to an employer 'oh please, reduce my pension you are too generous and if I accept it I might be doing a great disservice to 'the young' in 50yrs time. And it's ridiculous to think that anyone would. Some older people might not understand how hard it is for our young people right now, or how it became so, but that does not make them responsible for it.

Thank you for saying what I wanted to, but couldn't articulate.

Those of you who are younger may well be doing things now that will disadvantage the next generation. You just don't know it yet because, like us, you don't have a crystal ball. You are just making the best of what is available to you, just as @nokidshere and I did at your age.

People might say that they don't 'blame' boomers, but the language used about us as a generation very much indicates that people do. And the resentment, understandable though it might be when you come across INDIVIDUAL boomers who don't seem to care about your plight, when generalised to us all, feels very personal. And many of us are informally doing all we can to help our kids out.

Those of you who are younger may well be doing things now that will disadvantage the next generation. You just don't know it yet because, like us, you don't have a crystal ball. You are just making the best of what is available to you, just as @nokidshere and I did at your age.

Well said. Be interesting to get their viewpoint in 20 or 40 years.

They’ll be dancing on our graves by then.

Everyone makes their best call, on the facts available at the time of making the call. Hindsight is always 20:20. Foresight, mostly known as planning, is a bit of a guesstimate.