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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to ask someone to stop clicking their joints

58 replies

hairyunicorn · 15/11/2022 16:20

The guy i sit next to at work keeps clicking his joints. Fingers, knuckles, knees everything. He dose it about every 5 minutes and it is driving me insane.

when he dose his knees he pushes back from his desk and kicks his legs out one at a time. The sound goes right through me and is very loud. is there any polite way to ask him to bloody stop. i know there isn't, so i am just posting so i don't kill him today

OP posts:
mamakoukla · 16/11/2022 01:10

Elbieo · 15/11/2022 21:19

IT IS SO DISGUSTING AND I HATE PEOPLE WHO DO THIS. IN FACT, THE SOUND MAKES ME WANT TO VOMIT. LAST WEEK, I HAD TO CHANGE TRAIN CARRIAGES BECAUSE A WOMAN WAS DOING THIS.

But now I feel a bit bad, knowing people HAVE to click because their joints hurt otherwise. I had no idea. I just thought you were foul fuckers. I promise to be more patient. But I do feel for you OP. Wear sound muffling headphones, if you can.

And joint clickers, what about compromising and (at least sometimes) going to the loo to click? Unless it is something that just comes upon you and HAS to be remedied immediately, a bit like onset of a migraine? It’s like listening to nails on a board. Genuinely makes me feel sick. Your discomfort becomes my discomfort.

It happens when I walk…. Sorry; I hate that it’s loud and I am self conscious but what to do? Stop walking?

Elbieo · 16/11/2022 08:01

mamakoukla · 16/11/2022 01:10

It happens when I walk…. Sorry; I hate that it’s loud and I am self conscious but what to do? Stop walking?

Oh god, no. I have never ever noticed anyone clicking while they walk, or indeed the constant clicking described above. If someone couldn’t help do it, or if it hurt if they didn’t, then their health takes priority.

What I’ve always disliked is the people who seemed to do it now and again, as a hobby. My son does it now and again, with his toes, YUUUK. Having read these posts I asked him if he clicked because his body hurts. He said no, his body doesn’t hurt. That’s the difference!

Op needs to ask colleague if he’s in pain and if the answer is yes, she needs to get headphones to muffle him out. Otoh if he is clicking for fun, or out of habit, like my son. Then colleague needs to be told to stop! But the fact that he does it all the bloody time suggests he has to?

Talking of pain v no pain, one of my mates as a kid used to click. At that age, I thought it was quite cool, and asked her how she did it. She didn’t mention any pain either, so I had no idea of the pain element. I remember trying to click (but I couldn’t) and my mother going nuts and saying not to click, since it made it wld lead to a habit. This is clearly wrong, at least for those posters with bone pain. Probably my visceral hatred of clicking comes from my mums dramatic reaction.

Maybe the girl on the train, who was loudly cracking her fingers, was also in pain. I don’t know. It was the equivalent of retching. Really grating. She was very pretty, very young, and her mates didn’t seem to notice.

IntrovertedPenguin · 16/11/2022 08:03

I do this, it's necessary for me otherwise my joints stiffen up and I can't move them.

I wouldn't ask someone to stop.

IntrovertedPenguin · 16/11/2022 08:05

Elbieo · 15/11/2022 21:19

IT IS SO DISGUSTING AND I HATE PEOPLE WHO DO THIS. IN FACT, THE SOUND MAKES ME WANT TO VOMIT. LAST WEEK, I HAD TO CHANGE TRAIN CARRIAGES BECAUSE A WOMAN WAS DOING THIS.

But now I feel a bit bad, knowing people HAVE to click because their joints hurt otherwise. I had no idea. I just thought you were foul fuckers. I promise to be more patient. But I do feel for you OP. Wear sound muffling headphones, if you can.

And joint clickers, what about compromising and (at least sometimes) going to the loo to click? Unless it is something that just comes upon you and HAS to be remedied immediately, a bit like onset of a migraine? It’s like listening to nails on a board. Genuinely makes me feel sick. Your discomfort becomes my discomfort.

God then you'd hate me, all my joints click and crunch as I move and walk. Nothing I can do about it. Grin

hairyunicorn · 16/11/2022 08:30

I work at reception so we are literally sat next to each other at the same desk. I did ask him why he clicks and he just said it was a habit from when he was a teenage and that it feels good.

not much i can do but sit and bear it

OP posts:
AriettyHomily · 16/11/2022 08:31

My kids are doing it all the time. It's a fucking TikTok thing.

IneedanewTV · 16/11/2022 08:38

IntrovertedPenguin · 16/11/2022 08:05

God then you'd hate me, all my joints click and crunch as I move and walk. Nothing I can do about it. Grin

But that is different to someone clicking every finger ever hour. Your situation is normal. We all click at times.

oviraptor21 · 16/11/2022 08:40

If it's just a habit then yes, I'd definitely be requesting that he stop or is moved or that something is put in place to recognise that it's not acceptable. If he's on reception it's really not very professional. Every once in a while to relieve pressure or when he moves is fine. But randomly because it's a habit- no.

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