Ok so I'm almost 23 weeks pregnant, and my DH is yet to tell his mother. This means that in the meantime he doesn't want me to put anything on social media encase his family see it and tell her, or really tell anyone encase it gets out.
But at 23 weeks enough is enough. I've had enough of having to keep my pregnancy a secret just because he's scared of his mums reaction.
AIBU to just stop this nonsense and make it public now and let him deal with the fall out?
(for what it's worth we are a 38 year old married couple with 4 children, not 14 year old kids).
Backstory: I / we have a horrible relationship with his mother. Pregnancy is always a bone of contention and I have been no contact with her for 5 years since the day we told her we were pregnant with number 3 and she lost her mind - told DH to "force me" to have a termination or leave me because I'm ruining his life and just having babies for his money. (He's not rich, he works a regular job with a just above national average wage & I am a SAHP).
She's generally an awful and abusive person. DH has low contact, he saw her last month for the first time in almost 3 years however didn't tell her that day as he didn't want to "rock the boat" whilst attempting to work on their relationship.
She has literally one way or another spoilt every single happy occasion in mine and DHs relationship, from first birthdays, pregnancies, our wedding, births, and christenings etc.
She's not in my life and I haven't been able to share and celebrate my pregnancy publicly because DH is tiptoeing around her narcissism (I know this is where he just needs to man up but she also sends him suicidal threats etc when she doesn't get her own way, and when we've announced previous babies so it's not completely straight forward).
How much longer should I wait for him? For what ever reason he still cares and believes that she deserves to find out from him face to face not over the phone or via anyone else.
Help