To think “first come, first served” is a bit shit when the same people always get there first?

54 replies

AngeloMysterioso · 14/11/2022 13:41

I’m having a big clear out of a lot of the stuff I held onto when my Mum died earlier this year and I’ve been posting it onto a local Facebook group for people giving away unwanted things. Some of it is really nice stuff, could be used as Christmas presents etc.

The vast majority of the items I’ve posted are being shotgunned by the same few people and I’m starting to feel like they’re taking the piss, but because they got in there first I feel like I have to honour it.

So AIBU to think FCFS is rather crap when it allows people to be greedy and get away with it?

OP posts:

humpty74 · 14/11/2022 18:40

Look for a 'buy nothing' group near you on fb, they feel much less set up to cater for the people who sit online all day grabbing all the good stuff. Posts in my local one often end up with the poster saying they're putting names in a hat in a few hours when something proves popular, never seen anyone complain.

LolaSmiles · 14/11/2022 18:46

I swap which groups I post in to get round that, though generally the admins are quite good at weeding out people who take more than they give if they're regularly asking for everything.

The admins for the groups I'm in seem to be quite happy for people to request lots of it items when they're also regularly passing items on in the group. Anyone who is taking excessively tends to get booted.

Fe345fleur · 14/11/2022 19:06

fyn · 14/11/2022 14:17

Can you use Olio? You can advertise anything on there, not just food! You can wait a day until choosing who to give it to.

I recommend Olio too. People are rated which helps weed out time wasters.

ichundich · 14/11/2022 19:22

Dontaskdontget · 14/11/2022 14:10

You can put at the end of your post “also advertised elsewhere.” Then after leaving the ad up for a day, give to who you want and sort out via private messages. Then just delete your post without explanation to avoid debates/whinging. But, see below.

I’ve given a lot of stuff away over the last few years and I find that the options are:

(1) Facebook mum group. Rich sahms will always be first to comment. They’ll use the item as a spare at their childminders, or put it in their airbnb. But, they’ll turn up on time, be polite, and collect with nice big vehicle.

(2) Facebook mum group where you sneakily via private message choose someone who isn’t one of the usual rich mums, and congratulate yourself on your own charity and cunning. Unfortunately your chosen person will fail to turn up the first few times, make up an increasingly ridiculous series of excuses, then demand you deliver. You’ll then move to the next person who will come, but they’ll look around and start asking for your other stuff that isn’t available and be annoyed you won’t give them whatever they like for free. They hate you and they do not understand the difference between someone who’s ok for money and a council-funded giveaway service.

(3) Drive it to a charity shop, where there will be no parking nearby and you’ll have to carry heavy bag through several streets until you eventually reach the shop, where a suspicious old lady will insist on pawing through the bag in front of you and rejecting half the items at random to show they have standards.

(4) supermarket donation bins for shoes / clothes. Annoyingly, perfectly nice clothes may be turned into rags.

(5) Sell on ebay for £5 plus delivery. This works surprisingly well but ebay demand a lotta info from you.

I usually do charity shop now, or ebay if item is big, but frankly I do also value the quick and easy collection service provided by the rich sahms.

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