AIBU to expect school to call me back?

[LivingChess]

Waved DS (Yr6, ASD) off to school this morning. 25 minutes later (20 mins after the bell) I got a message from his teacher asking where he was and had he slept in.

I went out looking for him, not in the garden or on way to school. Called her, she said she was looking for him, wasn't in the room they were in or his classroom. Whilst on the phone to me she found him "hiding".

I tried to call in the 5 minute break between lessons and got no answer (wasn't really expecting one as I knew she had to get from the music room to her classroom) , so immediately tried to call his 1:1 who was due with him in 2nd lesson. No answer, so I sent a text asking if DS was ok. Also no answer.

AIBU to expect either the teacher I spoke to, his class teacher or his TA to at least drop me a text to say he's ok or to have called me quickly at break time?

Schools I have been in, staff are not allowed phones in the classrooms.
I think as you know he was found safe you can assume he IS ok if they don’t call. No news is good news. And they are more likely to call you at lunchtime I think.

You must’ve been so worried though, glad it wasn’t for too long.

I'm not sure why you are wanting them to call you again when they already found him and have informed you of that?

Surely they would only call you again if there was an issue with your DS?

You called the teacher and sent a text to the TA? I'm really surprised you have their personal phone numbers.

I'm glad your son was found it must have been a frightening experience. Is there an office number you could call for an update?

Schools I have been in, staff are not allowed phones in the classrooms.
Our school most definitely has phones in classrooms. Each class teacher has a mobile we can contact if child is ill, late, off PE etc. You can never get hold of anyone at Friday lunchtime as there is no school in the afternoon.

Is there an office number you could call for an update?
Yes, there's a number but the office is only open Mon & Wed mornings.

I understand the frustration but logically you know he’s been found and if he wasn’t ok they would be getting in contact with you, not waiting for you to get in contact.

Call you back for what? They found him. Presumably, as their class time was disrupted looking for him they needed to get back to teaching rather than making repeat calls.

What did you want them to say? You knew they had found him.

How bad is his autism if he can walk to school alone?

Or if he is collected then surely they know he got into school?

They found him, he'd been hiding and clearly was fine, otherwise she'd have said so.

Not sure why they should call you again.

It's unusual for parents to have such direct telephone contact with staff.

However, I wouldn't expect communications during lesson time even with such access. There may be other things going on.

You know they've found him. I would expect communications at the end of the day as to what actually occurred.

Since you know that they've found him I'd only expect an update at this point if something else untoward had happened I think.

Glad he's safe though - you must have been frantic.

I'm astonished that teachers and TAs have access to their mobile phones. Ours had to be in our lockers apart from break time.

But given that they do, they're probably massively busy and simply can't respond to you. Or they've not got their phone on their person to know that you've tried to get in touch.

and if he wasn’t ok they would be getting in contact with you,
I take your point, but I don't know that. They have form e.g. not contacting me when he was injured.
His TA could legitimately answer me, I think, as it directly involves the well being of DS.

@ahunf we live next door but one to school, he goes and comes home himself (or with DC2).

And on a purely selfish level, I'd like to know what happened so I can have an idea of what behaviour to prepare for when he gets home.

Are you in a different time zone/country OP?

I only ask because you initially posted at 10am and were saying that they could have text/called at break but at my DDs primary school they started the day at 8.45, classes started at 8.55 and break was at 10.20 so by the time you posted it wouldn't even be breaktime yet and they would be halfway through their second class of the day (45 minute class periods).

I think they've shown themselves to be on the ball to have messaged you within 25 mins of him leaving home and have found him before 10am so less than an hour since school started. I would give them time to at least speak with DS to find out what happened (as well as getting on with actual teaching as I assume the first hour of class time was disrupted for everyone as their teacher was looking for your DS) before you start bombarding them with calls/expecting answers.

@melj1213 yes. They start at 725 and have break at 950. School will be out soon anyway. But if it's an issue that needs sorting, it needs sorting now else there'll be trouble getting him in on Monday.

I don’t even get email addresses for my kids teachers let alone phone numbers. At my kids school you either have to call/ email the office or if you lucky catch them at drop off.

I think you will just need to assume no news is good news.

Its difficult I get it but you need to be mindful that the teachers will be busy as they have a class full of children to think about.

FFS all I've got from DS is that he went to the loo and forgot he had to go to class... So something clearly happened, I don't know what, he can't/won't say and I've heard nothing from the school.