AIBU to move family from seaside to city?

[user1504044345]

I am going to be vague here as don’t want to out myself but I want to move my family (3 dc) back to the city I grew up in and where the industry I work in is based. Where we currently live by the seaside is lovely with families all making the opposite move and coming from the city to live here but it’s boring me to tears and I want to be able to work properly without a huge commute. My dilemma is wrenching them away from friends and all they know with all the obvious downsides of city life and if it’s all a huge mistake? My main concern is that my SEN son has a lovely friend for the first time ever and I’m scared he won’t again. I know no-one can make this decision other than me but would love to hear other people’s thoughts!!

How much longer are your children - children?

How long is your commute?

Depends what city you want to go back to I suppose

good luck

Did you move your family from the city or were you by the seaside before you had kids?

How old are your kids?

It sounds like there's more too it, it's hard to comment without knowing ages of DC / backstory / lifestyle and safely of the areas etc.

Tbh if your only reasons are your commute and you being bored to tears then I wouldn't be taking DC away from their first ever friends for that.

I guess the ‘more to it’ is that I’ve been homesick for the entire time we’ve lived here and have been constantly working out ways to get back there which I can now make a reality. Our eldest two were 3 and 1 when we left and we have given it a go for nearly 7 years. I guess I just want someone to tell me it’s all going to be ok!! Which isn’t possible but would love to hear if anyone moved from coast to city and how the kid’s adjusted.

Would you consider waiting until your children had finished school? Or is that ridiculously too far in the future?

Is there a way you could move and keep your children in the same school? Maybe if you loved half way?

It's a really tough decision. I think if my children were happy in school and it was going well I would have to be incredibly unhappy to move them. On the flip side people move all the time and it's probably most likely kids would find it hard at first but they will settle.

Why don't you just try to get a job closer to home and involve yourself in new hobbies/activities where you are to deal with the boredom?

I would really put first what will give your kids the best quality of life.

We did very large town/almost city to coastal large town nearly 7 years ago. I too missed it terribly, and still get the occasional down day missing friends and my old job. But, I know that I couldn't go back now.

The place we moved from has built up at a terrifying pace and the kids are settled with all the benefits of living where we do, e.g. here they can play out with their friends, which just wouldn't be possible in the same way where we were before.

It's also so much more expensive that it just wouldn't be possible to have the lifestyle we have here back in the city and we would struggle to get them school places too.

All that said, I can understand what you're feeling and wish you the best.

I can’t get a job closer to home as my industry is very much specific to this city so it would either mean no career for me or 4 hour a day commute.

Advantages for us living in a city was easy access to sports facilities - any sport really, training and teams to join. Swimming pools. As they became teens this was great - could hop on the bus or walk to weekend hockey practice no taxi service required,