To go on holiday with MIL or not?

[Hol932]

Hi,

I have a bit of a dilemma and feel I am too easily influenced by my own mum I must say, so looking for some partial advice.

Been married to DH for 5 years, we’ve had plenty of holidays and always said we want to take our parents away and make memories with them. I do like MIL, but she can annoy me sometimes but we’ve never argued etc.

We are having our first child next year and planned to do a 5 day trip possibly when baby is 5-8 months, somewhere in Europe.

I spoke to my mum and she said we should have our first holiday with our child alone as a family of 3 and make the most of it whilst we’re young etc. She also wasn’t too keen to go on holiday with MIL (they’ve never had any issues, I guess they’re not close). She then mentioned that she couldn’t imagine my brother saying he wants to go on holiday with her etc.

So yes, initially I did want to go on holiday with all my family and MIL but now thinking should our first holiday with DC be alone? I don’t think I would want to go on holiday with just us and MIL either tbh, but think I could persuade my parents to come for a few days too if we decided.

We are both in our early 30s. So just wanted some opinions, do you think your first holiday with DC should be alone? And do people do family holidays in their early 30s or should we enjoy being youngish and have our own holidays?

YABU- Do the family holiday/go with MIL
YANBU- Enjoy being young/ have your first holiday with DC alone as a couple

No rights or wrongs, but it sounds a bit as if you are trying to orchestrate your Mums into some sort of ‘making memories’ project if your own rather than going with the flow of what people actually want to do.

And it sounds as if your Mum’s idea of a great holiday is not going away with your MIL.

I’m with your Mum! Some people do have good family holidays with the in laws but we had an awful experience- never again. Babies change everything. I would definitely just be going alone ans a family and if you really need to do an odd night away with MIL but there’s no need really.

Before you commit to a full holiday with MIL, why not go on a few day trips such as a community farm or day at the seaside etc?
will be easier on your pocket, only a small dose of MIL and you are still making memories.