Just got dumped

[singleforeverr]

And feel strange about it. Aibu?

It was a shit relationship - we were together out of convenience. There were good times but I have been considering leaving for a year. Lots of money has been sunk in and it felt overwhelming to think about starting afresh with someone new. We were just going through the motions for the last few months.

So in one sense, I’m not upset that it’s over as it’s for the best. But I can’t shake the feeling of rejection and that I’m not good enough? And I wish I ended things with him first and sooner.

Life in general has been stressful with one thing after another, so even though we should go separate ways, it just feels like another thing piled on. We have an important appointment tomorrow which I booked time off work for, he’s cancelled on that so I’m annoyed at losing my AL too and wondering what I’m gonna do all day instead

It's not that you're not good enough and you know that deep down. You just weren't the right compatibility for each other and one of you has made the first move to correct it, as you said, you knew it wasn't right and hadn't yet done anything about it - that's all.

They had to move aside for you to find the person that is really meant for you ✨

Thank you for posting @MrsAlexander 😊 made me feel better x

in the future I think I need to be more proactive in leaving unhappy situations. It’s weird as I don’t miss him, I’m more thinking about all the wasted time

This happened to me a couple of months ago. It hurts, although a bit less as time goes by. I so wish I'd had the courage of my instincts! But then maybe I'd be here typing about my regrets at 5 in the morning!

Oh yes I know that feeling.

Well, it isn't a bad thing to make sure that someone isn't right for you before you decide to split. People go through bad patches. Unless it is abusive of course.

Yeah, it could have been something we could bounce back from as nothing outright abusive happened and we were together for 3 years. He would forget about plans/cancel last minute or keep me waiting for hours, so I found him unreliable. He would go back on his word or recreate past events in his head which was tiring. He would say inappropriate things about his ex, people he finds attractive, my friends/family and was always ranting about something.

When I raised this with him, nothing changed so it was a bit of a cycle. I was very passive and it probably came across that I checked out

I’m sorry you were upset but it sounds like you will be better off.

Why was so much sunk in? Did you support him financially?

He sounds awful, should have left sooner