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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Toddlers group leader assumed I was DS' grandma today!!

21 replies

TantieTowie · 29/01/2008 15:12

And I'm only 38. He's one.

That's it - just wanted to vent steam. Would be interested to know if this has happened to anyone else.

OP posts:
larry5 · 29/01/2008 15:15

Dont worry it happened to me as well. I was 40 when my dd was born and people have thought that she is my gdd but I just ignore them. Mind you as my dh has a grey beard and was 45 when she was born he has had even more comments!

PrincessPeahead · 29/01/2008 15:18

christ I would have been mortified
poor you
aurgh

Threadlice · 29/01/2008 15:21

There was one local man that I often saw out with a child. I chatted to him about his 'grandson'. A neighbour later pointed out to me that he was in fact the child's father.

He moved to Australia.

TantieTowie · 29/01/2008 15:21

Was indeed mortified - I suppose it's technically possible, but even so... Surely these days people don't make that kind of assumption out loud.

OP posts:
PrincessPeahead · 29/01/2008 15:22

lol about moving to australia
seems a bit extreme

Cappuccino · 29/01/2008 15:24

I remember covering a court case when I was pg with dd1

a woman my age (30) was in the dock, her solicitor asked if the judge was considering prison could he please consider the impact it would have on her daughter and grandchild

I remember thinking wow, I could have grandchildren by now and I'm just getting ready to have my first

Hassled · 29/01/2008 15:24

Poor you - I can't believe anyone would say that - it's the sort of thing where you just keep your assumptions to yourself until you're absolutely sure. What a moron. Toddler Groups are great places for embarrassing clangers - someone once asked me when I was due (I wasn't) and I went home and cried!

TantieTowie · 29/01/2008 15:25

Threadlice - we crossed messages - I shall investigate emigration possibilities forthwith! But that must have been equally embarrassing, I imagine.

OP posts:
PortAndLemon · 29/01/2008 15:49

It happened to my mother with my sister (similar age gap to yours with your DS). She was buying pyjamas and the sales assistant said "Oh, are these for your little granddaughter?" then saw the look on my mother's face and quickly (but not quickly enough) added "...or niece ... or daughter ... or something..."

I was there at the time and have to admit I was PMSL...

kerryk · 29/01/2008 15:59

i remember waiting to be served in next one day and a little girl was screaming and trying to climb out her buggy, i thought i was being helpfull by saying "ohh are you playing up for granny" and trying to distract her.

suppose you can all quess what the "granny" said to me next time i will keep my mouth shut.

Mercy · 29/01/2008 16:04

This has almost happened to me several times! (By almost I mean at the very last second the person who was obviously about to refer to me a Gran starts mumbling)

How old is the toddler group leader, Tantie? The other day I went to pick up ds from nursery and the student was rather confused when ds said 'Hello Mummy!'

The student is 17 and I'm 44, so I can understand why she probably thought I was the gran.

nametaken · 29/01/2008 16:09

How rude she should have kept her assumptions to herself.

I must admit once the woman at the leisure centre booked me into the over 50s keep fit class - I was 42 at the time. I never went back without my make up on again.

I could have understood if she had been young herself but she was about 56 anyway.

catsmother · 29/01/2008 16:16

Thankfully not (or at least if people have thought it they've kept it to themselves).

At 43, I am more concerned when I am out and about with both my kids - a 4 year old daughter and an almost 18 son - that people don't mistake DS for my toyboy or something. (and I'm sure he is too).

littlemansmummy · 29/01/2008 16:37

Oh, I feel for you. It happened to me in ELC last week. I was teasing a proud grandmum at the till for buying her new born grandson a huge pile of toys. She gave me a wink, pointed at the Aquadraw I'd bought for my son and said 'Now, don't tell me that's not for YOUR grandchildren'. I'm 40.

fuzzywuzzy · 29/01/2008 16:45

I actually recall a smiliar story happen to a woman who was shopping in mothercare for her new baby, the woman was shopping with her grown up daughter and the sales assistant assumed the daughter was the mother to be and made a comment about the woman shopping for her grandchild, woman was very upset, made the national papers and got a lot of gift vouchers from mothercare along with profuse apologies.......

RubyRioja · 29/01/2008 16:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

izzybiz · 29/01/2008 16:49

My mum worked in our local mat unit, went into one of the private rooms where there was an older woman, her daughter and the new baby, my mum asked the younger woman if she wanted a drink and the older woman said, "I'm the new mum"!

People used to think that my Ds was my little brother!

TheFallenMadonna · 29/01/2008 16:50

Are there lots of younger mothers where you live? We moved just before ds was born, and I was really rather relieved. At my ante natal classes (old location) I was a good 10 years older than most of the other women. I suspect I would have been mistaken for a grandmother a lot if we'd stayed .

ShinyHappyPeopleHoldingHands · 29/01/2008 16:50

If you're not sure, it's better to verbally assume that the person is the parent.. they'll soon put you right if they're the grandparent, and you can say "Oh! You don't look enough...!"

Smile all round!

I wonder if people will be assuming I'm my step-grandsons' mother when I'm wheeling them around in a few months, age 36 Hope so!

ShinyHappyPeopleHoldingHands · 29/01/2008 16:51

OLD enough

flicky · 29/01/2008 16:53

someone once asked me in Tesco if I was dd's 'mummy or Nanny'

Me,not even thinking that by 'Nanny' she meant granny said 'Oh no,I'm the Mummy we don't have a Nanny'

I was half way home before the other,more shocking meaning struck me and I was all for turning round and going back to smack her,but my poor old legs were aching and I needed a sitdown and a nice hot cuppa.

But if I ever see her again,I shall run over her with my shopping trolley

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