To be fucking worried she’s got cancer.

[SuspiciousBanana]

I lost my dad to cancer this year. It was horrific. My mum has recently moved and the entire process has been truly awful. She’s just started to settle in her new home but she’s sprained her back which is on the mend. She’s also been complaining about bowel issues and some abdominal discomfort including protruding sensation from her abdomen.

she’s been back and forth to her GP surgery (who were totally fucking USELESS with my dad and haven’t been great with my mum and her issues, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to contact them to push for help.)

She’s had blood test results back today and she has slightly raised protein levels of ca125. She’s going to have an ultra scan and CT if necessary whenever they can fit her in. She could be waiting up to a month for them and then a month for any results. (This also happened to my dad and he was too late for any help)

I’ve not said anything to her but everything there points to Ovarian cancer doesn’t it?

I just can’t face going through all this again. I’ve had to remain so strong to support her, and I’ll need to continue for this too. Both my sibling are now dead, my dad is dead and now I know I’m going to lose my mum too so soon after everyone else.

I know I can’t do anything, but I also don’t know what to do. I just really hate this.

So worrying OP.

Is there any way at all you can call the GP make a huge fuss. Mention your dad's late diagnosis due to lack of action and insist she is referred urgently?

I don’t know what to do because I don’t want to put the shits up her and get her paranoid and stressed again.

I'm so sorry for your losses, I understand why you're concerned. It also matches the symptoms for bowel cancer (as well as lots of things that aren't scary). You could buy a FOB test and a FIT test and either they'll be negative and put your mind a little bit at ease or positive and the GP will have to make a two-week referral. You can buy FITs from Lloyds online and FOBs from Amazon - total cost is less than £20 and they give instant results.

My Dad's GP completely missed his liver cancer, and he's now dying. I will be going fully nuclear when this is all over but right now, my energy is on Dad.

Can she afford to see the Consultant privately? Even if it's an interest free credit card?

The protruding may well be a separate issue and a hernia btw. DH has got one in his groin and he gets the weirdest sensations from it.

I'm sorry I have no words of wisdom but sending love to you and your mum. I hope it all turns out ok

Thanks for that. I’m not sure what an FOB test is but I’ll go take a look.

I don’t want to do anything that will send her into a panic. I’m so worried and I need to totally remain absolutely calm for her sake.

I‘m so sorry about your dad. It’s so difficult to process and to witness but I was totally the same as you although I’ve not complained to them yet as I’ve just not had the mental energy. (MacMillan nurses were the same, they were totally useless.)

If it helps at all most referrals for suspected cancer turn out not to be. I understand how you feel, DH was diagnosed with cancer last year and now I see it everywhere. I was actually referred for an ultrasound myself after convincing myself I had ovarian cancer, I think it took about 3 weeks from the referral but then it was only about a week until I got a call from my GP to say the results were back and there was nothing wrong.

Is your mum perhaps of an age where she gets FIT tests sent to her anyway? I had a word with my parents about them as DH has bowel cancer and it turns out they've been getting and doing them for years but hadn't mentioned it because who wants to talk to their daughter about pooing on a stick.

If you've not had a good experience with Macmillan nurses can I recommend Maggie's? They are really good at both practical advice and emotional support for loved ones as well as people living with cancer. I've also overheard a Maggie's member of staff preparing to phone up and issue a bollocking to an unhelpful GP surgery, not sure if that's standard practice or not but could be worth a chat.

As someone who's mum died of ovarian cancer and the GPs kept refusing a scan because they said she couldn't have it again and were beyond useless keep pushing and pushing the GPs please.

I will never forgive them what happened with my mum so want you to get it early and hopefully it can be treated.

Im not saying your mum has but they need to do whatever to rule anything out.

Thoughts with you.

@Mummbles hi, what is the difference between FIT and FOB tests? Especially the FOB amazons ones say they are same like FIT tests but call themselves FOB ? I m confused.