Fear is a choice

[LettingsBe]

Last night on I'm A Celebrity James Haskell said, "fear is a choice", which I believe might come from a quote by someone else.

However, aibu to say fear ISN'T a choice? I have an abusive ex partner who I have a fear of seeing, I also have a fear of various other things due to things that happened in my childhood.

So do we really think fear is a choice?

It's just a bit of a mantra isn't it, not that literal.

I have one where I just tell myself to make friends with fear and say 'oh hello you again', it means accepting the adrenaline coursing in my body and letting it crescendo and pass instead of locking onto my thoughts riding the adrenaline wave, if I do that then I don't escalate into a panic attack. Took a lot of work to get to that point obviously.

Of course fear isn't a choice it's one of the primary emotions and we depend on fear for survival. I'd say that how we react to fear is a choice but again it depends on how extreme the fear is and how an individual processes the situation - once adrenaline kicks in it can take over (eg flight fight freeze). It sounds like it's something he's saying to try to control his reaction to the situation rather than the feeling of fear itself.

In case of the fear of flying, fear is often a “choice”. First, let’s start by saying that flying nowadays is considered very safe. When you are afraid of flying you are playing an imagined scenario in your head that you are going to crash. You are choosing to imagine this as a very strong possibility, whereas, in fact, it is very very unlikely. But hey, you are choosing the very unlikely imagined scenario that hasn’t even happened yet (and most likely won’t). So yes, it’s often a choice. We imagine a possible bad outcome that probably won’t happen and project it into the future.
If we always feared everything, and always imagined the worst, we would never get out of bed.

I'm not in fear of most things that are a danger to me though. I'm aware of them and take appropriate action. I do a hobby that loads of people would be very afraid doing, but the danger is the same for me or for them, if I felt fear them I wouldn't be able to do it.

It's actually my awareness of the danger that means I don't need to fear it

He clearly means "letting the fear overwhelm you is a choice". It's bloody obvious what he means. Don't be dense to try and justify your intentional outrage. It's like when people say "sleep when you're dead"...they don't actually mean they're never, ever, ever going to sleep.

The emotion of fear and the medical condition of anxiety are not remotely the same thing and to equate them (like you have) is patronising and ridiculous.

Sorry, quoted the wrong point in the chain.

The emotion of fear and the medical condition of anxiety are not remotely the same thing and to equate them (like you have) is patronising and ridiculous.

Eh? The symptoms of anxiety and the symptoms of fear are literally identical. Both come from the same place in the brain, they just have different causes/triggers.

It depends on the context. Feeling fear about about a physical activity is a choice. Feeling fear because you're scared every day in an abusive relationship isn't a choice.

Yeah, that's bollocks. You clearly don't know what you are talking about. Ask a psychologist.

Sounds like the typical scripted dimwitted remark from a celebrity.

Fear is a survival instinct.

No motivational mantra encompasses every individual in every situation. We might tell our children to never give up and that they can be whatever they want to be, by which we mean to empower them and give them the confidence to aim high, rather than actively make people with severe learning disabilities feel crap because they’re unlikely to ever become surgeons or actuaries.

I think 'fear is a choice' is a fine motivational mantra for the tasks they face in the jungle, which it sounds like he was referring to. Nobody is facing a life and death scenario but can do a bit of mind over matter with their fear of snakes/spiders or whatever.

Think you've confused me with yourself.

This a quote from that psychologist you think I should ask...
"Fear is an emotional reaction to a specific, real danger, while anxiety is an excessive and unfocused fear that may be triggered by a variety of stimuli. Anxiety caused by stress may persist long after the trigger is removed or arise with no trigger at all...These excess feelings of anxiety at seemingly normal events are classified as anxiety disorders."

batonrougebehavioral.com/fear-vs-anxiety-understanding-the-difference/

HTH

"Fear is an emotional reaction to a specific, real danger, while anxiety is an excessive and unfocused fear that may be triggered by a variety of stimuli. Anxiety caused by stress may persist long after the trigger is removed or arise with no trigger at all...These excess feelings of anxiety at seemingly normal events are classified as anxiety disorders."

batonrougebehavioral.com/fear-vs-anxiety-understanding-the-difference/

Fear is absolutely not a choice and nothing anyone says can convince me otherwise.

From the NHS website:
Anxiety affects everyone differently and can be brought on by different situations or experiences. It is our body's natural reaction to perceived danger, focusing our attention and giving us a rush of adrenaline to react, sometimes called the "fight or flight" response.

That's a fear response.

HTH indeed.

www.nhs.uk/every-mind-matters/mental-health-issues/anxiety/?WT.mc_id=Anxiety&gclid=CjwKCAiA9qKbBhAzEiwAS4yeDYTakALY_Lle2SVhxtZikLJzc38nX8kDRzhWJzex9Ivi7NLnO5qCbhoCPHAQAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds

Yeah it's a fine mantra for IAC where their scary activities are risk assessed up to their eyeballs.

Rest of life: it's not a bad thing to ask yourself why you're feeling scared before dismissing your feelings with trite mantras.

Feeling fear isn't a choice. Choosing how to process it is (although people with extreme anxiety/PTSD etc) will need support to make that choice.

Unfortunately, I am finding Mike Tyndall to be a big Alpha Male bore. He’s just touting for business in the jungle so he can do some promotional speaking or Insta crap when he comes out about releasing your inner beast or something.

Best to ignore him really.

It depends on the situation. Fear can keep you safe if it stops you from doing something foolish.

Fear is a choice is a great quote for Twitter as it fits in the character allowance and sounds all deep. Of course it's rubbish. Fear is a normal human reaction to a threatening situation, something inherently animalistic, and not under our direct control.

Saying that he'd used the phrase as a good athlete would in a moment of competition so it was a good use for him in his specific moment of challenge. Not everything is meant to be taken as generalisable to every person and situation.

Fear is a logical reaction to a threat.

If he's on that show he's most likely a complete twat, so you can ignore his opinion.

This is similar to telling people with depression to just brighten up, as if it's their own choice to be depressed.

Sometimes (and I repeat, sometimes) it is within out control to take action to help ourselves feel less depressed or less scared... in the same way you can put a bandage on your sprained ankle. But it wasn't your choice to sprain it, or to feel pain.

Just like it wasn't your choice to be depressed, or scared.

I have cptsd and my trite mantras help me thanks.