My mum is an insomniac and agoraphobic with general anxiety. Her and my dad retired to a remote(ish) rural area a few years ago, hours away from me and my brother.
Mum has no friends or relatives, spends her days doing housework and watching TV. She barely eats, won't socialise or do gentle exercise, which is all making her MH worse. My dad was meant to go to an event in London recently for his brother's 70th. But Mum can't tolerate being alone for a few hours without him, and had a breakdown. After arriving at the venue, Dad had to immediately drive 3 hours back home because she rang him, while lying naked on the kitchen floor, saying she wanted to die. She's kind of holding my dad hostage.
It might sound like I'm being uncaring but this has caused me and my family so much stress and worry since I was a child, I'm exhausted. She'a been on medication and been to numerous therapists but none of it helps.
I remember worrying about my mum every day while I was at school, and I still worry every day about how she is and her quality of life and it's really burdening me. (She's only early 60s!). I speak to her 1-2 times a week and it's HOURS of her offloading all her 'problems.' My brother is nowhere to be seen in all of this and thinking he might have the right idea - aibu to start reducing my contact too for my own MH? I've accepted she'll be like this forever now and there is nothing I can do to help. But I also feel guilty.