Long time poster, name changed for this post.
DH and I have been married 10 years. For the first few years, we lived with inlaws. In short, MIL and FIL bullied me the whole time we were there.
For cultural reasons (and because I knew that my time with them was temporary), I essentially shut up and put up with their behaviour of me.
Fast forward 7 years or so of living apart from them, we've seen them weekly ever since. Barely missed a visit.
DH has never been one to call or text his parents in between visits.
They don't have "that" type of relationship.
Equally, because of the difficult relationship between his parents and I over the years,
whilst I am perfectly civil/polite/friendly to his parents when we do see them,
I don't have much contact with them between the weekly visit either.
Recently, MIL had a non life threatening procedure to have an organ removed.
I have had the same organ removed too, so I know exactly what she's been through and what the recovery is like.
I visited her in hospital once (not more than that because I have a young child, so I don't really leave them with others that frequently), sent her a voicenote checking how she was after a few days,
and came to visit her a few days after she was discharged and cooked dinner for the whole family in her home.
As an aside, since she was taken ill a few weeks ago, I have asked DH how his mum is getting on, near enough every day.
I also asked him again last night if he needed me to send any dinner to his mum for today, and have also been sending him links to things to make her recovery a little nicer (nothing major, new supportive pillows, a nice fleecy blanket). He obviously hasn't ordered these yet, but I mention this to show that I do think of MIL and despite everything, still make some effort.
Today, MIL complained to DH that she never hears fom me and that she receives "more texts" from other people such as her other daughter in laws, and all her friends.
MIL also had a conversation with my own mother yesterday, indirectly bashing "some daughter in laws" (aka me?!) and saying how her other DIL was just perfect for bathing her in hospital. So in short, I'm a shit DIL for not texting my MIL more often.
For context, I work 40 hours a week, am studying for a Masters, and also trying to be a parent/wife/individual. I am feeling really sensitive about this because I have had an exceptionally difficult few weeks (I've been unwell for 2 out lf the 3 weeks,
had a sick child in between and had work and uni deadlines to juggle).
Am I being unreasonable for being fucked off beyond words at this woman?
She treated me like absolute SHIT for years,
massively impacted my mental health resulting in PTSD that required therapy, and prior to this health incident of hers,
has never ever ever gone out of her way to text/call me to see how me or her grandchild are, and now she expects daily texts from me?!?!