Excluded from work WhatsApp group

[Ontobetterthings]

I don't know if I'm being unreasonable. I found out earlier I am excluded from work WhatsApp chat. People were talking about someone's holiday pics and the chat etc and realised I was there and looked awkward. It was everyone in the office.

I'm on a contract, been there a year and got another 6 months. They constantly text each other in front of me and discuss their social media's daily. I gave out my mobile number a long time ago and no-one gave me their number. Its starting to get me down tbh. I get on fine with people. I don't know if aibu? What do you think?

Are you 100% sure you've been deliberately excluded? If so, that's really poor form on their part. Only advice I can give is to try to rise above . At the end of the work day you can leave them behind.

But I ask if it's deliberate as the admin for our work whatsapp are forever forgetting to add people (even people that have been around longer than them) and do so quickly when asked.

It is overt bullying to deliberately and repeatedly exclude a colleague from social events. Truly awful behaviour on their part. I’m so glad you’ll be moving on before too long, but sorry you’ve had to deal with this. It never fails to disgust me how poorly so many people behave at work.

Have you actually told anyone you are not in the group and asked to be added? I'm the admin for our work WhatsApp group because I'm the manager but I'm terrible at this stuff. Only realised that 3 new employees weren't in the group when we were trying to arrange the Christmas meal. No one else could add them, it had to be me for whatever reason and I don't really use the group. If you haven't actually raised that you're not included with anyone it may just be that whoever is the admin literally hasn't realised you're not in the group.

If you were always going to be there for eighteen months then that's a bit rubbish. If you were originally hired for 6 months and then extended I can see how it happened: you don't invite temps into the ongoing social WhatsApp group because they'll be gone any moment now, and then when you get extended after six months then does someone go round and do a formal thing of inviting you?

I think it was a bit shit given that you're there for a decent span of time, but it is a known downside of contracting: you fall slightly outside the social rules, and you need to make a lot more of an effort if you want to be part of the herd, or just live with a purely transactional relationship with your coworkers. Sounds like a lot of posters on this thread would love that.

Don't assume they're all bitches, they're probably just a bit thoughtless and trapped in an awkward situation. Deciding that they're bad people who've actively decided to exclude you will harm your own happiness more than it will theirs.

It is shit to be excluded Op. I worked in a school on a term's contract where the rest of the staff referred to me as 'the supply' and organised events in front of me that I wasn't invited to. It was pre watts app so they didn't have the technology to do it behind my back. It was a horrible school and it was the longest term of my life. I absolutely understand how you feel and I am really sorry.

The colleague covering my maternity leave isn't in our work WhatsApp group. I thought this was normal?

Perhaps you could suggest she is added.

I have been on a few groups but got out
#I am not interested i loads of message from people I work with and are not my good mates
consider yourself lucky ! LOL

Whilst I see where you are coming from just step back and keep it professional. They are colleagues, not friends and sometimes they can become pals but not always-just totally depends on the workplace and how you gel in. I was in workplaces where I fitted right in and others where I felt a coldness.

This is 1 of the times. Go in,do your job, be polite and courteous but leave it at that.

Could be worse, I had a permanent job in an office of 4 (5 including MD). MD took all of the office staff (except me) and all of the foremen to Las Vegas for a week. I spent that week closing the office and attending interviews. Left soon after they got back.
It's horrible being left out, especially if nobody even tries to hide it. You've only got 6 months left, just ride it out.

Jesus H, who wants their phone pinging day and night at work or at home?
My team's mobiles are off-limits during work time, but I do have communications with colleagues whom I'm friendly outside of work with. However, I wouldn't want excessive nightly pinging with inane chatter.

I can understand you feeling hurt and feeling excluded. Is it a group for all employees, discussing work, or just a small group of 'friends who work together'? We have a main group for everyone, and separately a group of 4 of us who are now very close friends. The main group gets added to when new people join the team but it's a pain in the arse and some colleagues don't have any boundaries so it gets muted by most people. Work WhatsApp groups are quite a modern thing and we all managed fine without them before. In our friendship group one we're allowed to arrange our social lives without it being considered bullying. We don't want to spend all our free time with other work colleagues and we are allowed to choose who we have friendships with. We do however add every new starter to the work group, regardless of contract type.

I'm on a contract, been there a year and got another 6 months

I was a contractor for years and sadly, some places don't treat contractors in the same way as permanent staff. I've worked in places where I've been told I couldn't expect to be included because 'you're just the temp' and others where no distinction was made between contractors and permanents (thankfully, the majority). They're petty toxic bullies and you only have to put up with them for another six months.

I bet it is because you are on a contract. Similar thing happened to me. I joined a firm as a contractor. One lunchtime, literally everyone in the team got up put coats on, gathered together and went out for a team lunch. I was the only person in the entire office left behind, sat on my own for a couple of hours whilst they were all out.

It was not because someone had to cover either. I was a contractor and so left out.

Such weird behaviour. I am now a permanent member of staff but ensure I go out of my way to ensure contractors/temp staff feel included.

Honestly I would rise above. Don't ask to join the group.

Yes op its not nice but I worked with cliques. You best off out of it. I think those whatsapp get bitchy. Ignore them.

People can get really funny about contractors at work, just ignore them, head down and get on with work.

Thanks for your responses. It's helped me get some prospective.

Going through similar, I’m PT but not contract. They organise all the staff lunches and outings for the days I’m not there. I work at home those days so I presume it’s done so someone will cover the phones.

I was the only female at my last work not invited to a housewarming/Ann summers do. I asked the girl I was good friends with if she was invited. She said ‘yes but I’m not going to that bullshit. You’re actually lucky as you don’t need an excuse !’ She was right, the woman hosting it was a massive lump of shit tbh and I wouldn’t have gone if invited. Sometimes it’s actually better not to get involved.