If your family come to stay how long do they stay for?

[IntrovertedPenguin]

I don't live close to my family, around 2 hours on the train (5 hour drive).

My mum tends to have a habit of coming to stay and just staying for weeks on end. Last time she stayed was for 16 days.
8 weeks later she's staying for 11 days (baring in mind DC are at school in this time so interrupting their routine so to speak.)

I love seeing her and spending time with her but it's just so long. After a week I've had enough and want my own routine back, I can't sit and read while the kids play, can't even do my housework in peace without her trying to take over.
DH doesn't mind her staying but it's a lot.

She's still here for another 3 days and she's already on about coming again at the start of December for a week!

How long does your family stay? Am I being unreasonable thinking over a week is unreasonable to expect to stay with us?

I think you need to push ahead with your routine whilst she is there as much as you can. It does sound too long a visit for what it's worth.

They stay for lenght of te we agreed before they came.
Sounds like you might want to start putting boundaries in which suit you.

They also come when it's suitable for everyone not just on a whim

Depends how far they travel from

My mum lives 2 hours away and if staying over she will stay for a night or two, unless we have a week planned in

My Father lives overseas so stays for 3-4 months when visiting (and he is lucky he leaves with his face intact at the end )

I've tried all sorts, even said "oh that's a bit long, going back on xxxx day would be better for us." But it goes in one ear out the other. Or she'll just book her return ticket on a random date without even asking us!

Just say "yes, 1 week, going back saturday. No, can't budge on that sorry" no "oh that's bit long"

Just be firm. It's your house. It's also your mum and you love her, but boundaries are very much important. It will make it better for everyone.

If she books wrong date on a way back, by her ticket for correct date.

Family live about 5 hours away. Typical stay is about 2-3 nights. That's enough for all of us- hosts want their house back to normal and guests want to sleep in their own beds.

I live in the Channel Islands, my parents live in England (so less than 1 hour flight).

They come for 8 nights at most, by which time, I’ve usually fallen out with my Dad a couple of times.

I help them book their flights, and would never agree for them to stay much longer.

What's that saying? Guests, like fish, stink after 3 days?!

I'd say 3 nights, unless the person has travelled far (like overseas) or they are very self-sufficient.

Your spare room needs a new purpose. Isn't dc getting a snake for Christmas?

We don't have a spare room she sleeps in ASD DS room, who gets quite annoyed and rude about having to share.
I've explained to her it's to much for him sharing and she doesn't seem to understand and wonders why he gets an attitude after so long of her staying.

I don't think the clocks changing has helped feels like today is just dragging.

Just say the effect on ds's behaviour sadly means no long visits. Surely the happiness and well being of her dgc matters? Not sure how your dh hasn't headed for the hills op.

That's ridiculous, most people would book a nearby hotel or Airbnb. Does she think she will continue this as he gets older?

Far too long. My family is approx 4hrs away. 2 - 3 nights in the same house max, any longer and it's Hotels. Especially when you're sharing a room, I imagine it would be easier in a big house with a guest room.

If she's 2 hours away by train I think 2 nights is enough, perhaps once each quarter.

If I was your husband I'd have been driven insane.

Your son with ASD is being forced to share a bedroom with his Grandma? Poor kid.

You really need to grow a pair and tell her it's not working! You don't need another excuse.

When she visits with my dad they stay in a BnB, but he only comes on a overnight stay.

It's to much, I've told her my son is miserable sharing and having guests to stay for over a week is to much for him. She didn't even say anything.
She won't leave early now but next time I'm going to say 3 nights max, even DH has taken to hiding away upstairs most of the day! Even I've taken a hour upstairs to read in peace.

Is she thinking of the saving of her utility bills by using yours??!!

Hmm it’s convenient she doesn’t understand sharing someone’s bedroom is an imposition

Not going to lie, lm glad lm having twins and l will have a house full. I hate house guests! Maybe it’s just the guests l have who are rude. E.g. then MIL can l have my dinner now -this was at 5pm?! I don’t like the butter you get any your spare bed is uncomfortable (from a person who wanted me and my ex to share a single bed)

😂😂😂 no because my dads still at home using it all! I think she just wants to spend time with us and misses us as we can go 4-5 months without seeing her usually don't see her November till April. But it's a bit overkill.

Can you use it as an opportunity for a bit of free babysitting?