To be upset

[Stressedmumallday]

DH is away for work and we have a newborn. Just had a long day and don’t think I’m coping., just stressed. I love DD but I don’t think I’m coping

Hey OP, that sounds tough. How long is DH away for and how old is little one? Is it just tonight you're feeling this way or a more general feeling?

If the former, can you make plans for tomorrow - see your mum/sibling/friend to see if they can take the pressure off? If the latter, please speak to your gp/hv.

Honestly, having a newborn is just overwhelming and tough - I don't think anything prepares you. But I'm sure you're doing amazingly.

It's a lot isn't it.
I remember feeling very overwhelmed too.
I promise it gets easier.

Having a newborn is like a tiny beautiful hurricane just ripped through your body and life and youre kind of just standing there shocked but also crying constantly because hormones and no sleep. Its fucking tough. And any woman who has had a baby knows this and will understand and help you. Do you have anyone living close by you can phone to come help?

Hi, DH is away until next Thursday. Little one is 6 weeks old. I’ve been feeling overwhelmed the whole time he’s not been here, I’m actually already seeing my mum tomorrow

Can your mum come stay with you?

I’ll have to ask her tomorrow

Do, and be honest with how you're feeling. It's so hard having a newborn and there's nothing wrong with asking for more support. My DD just turned 1 and DH was away a few weekends ago and after a rough week at work and not sleeping well, I really didn't want to do 2 days straight on my own (I could, and have done it before), so I went to stay with my mum for a couple of days just for company and support and it made the world of difference.

It does get better. I promise.

That sounds really hard. Please ask your Mum I'd she can stay/ you go there. When mine were that age I used to count the hours til dh came home.

OP you're definitely NOT BU! I have a 2 year old and a 7 month old. My DH is away with work next week for 5 days and I've got my parents coming to stay. It's HARD work looking after very young children on your own. Take all the help and support you can get x

Oh I’ve been there, sweetheart. It’s all just a bit much at times. My oldest was three weeks old and he went away for four months (forces). No family near. Get yourself into a bit of a routine, not too rigid, make sure you go out every day. I promise it gets easier.

Until your mum can come, just focus on getting through. Do nothing but the essentials to keep you and DD fed and cared for. If that means holding her all day with Netflix on, do it.
Unfortunately your DHs trip has coincided with a tough spot. 6 weeks does seem challenging for some reason. They seem to cry a lot, the bad nights catch up and the sense of this is my life now can hit hard. But it passes and it gets easier, I promise. Be calm, be kind to yourself. Its a very tough job on your own and most people would really struggle.

It’s tough isn’t it. The shiny magazine covers all show beautifully turned out women with smiley, happy babies. Reality isn’t like that (I still remember going to a baby group and realising I had my tshirt on inside out).

Try not to do too much. Ie. Don’t expect your housework, shopping, etc to be up to date. You may have to lower your standards slightly, or appreciate things will take longer. Make sure you look after yourself as well - ie. Don’t miss meals.

May not sound much but Try and get some fresh air every day.

Also, are there are any mum and baby groups you can join. Sharing experiences can be really helpful and reassuring.

Op, the newborn stage is the worst. It's incredibly hard. I've had so many times when I thought I can't cope with this. I promise it will get better. Just focus on the basics. It's ok to do the minimum..is there anyone that can help at all? When is dh returning? Huge hugs!!

Yes I would see if your mum can spend a couple of nights with you.

It's hard at that age. My in-laws used to help a lot when DS was 6 weeks if DH went away - they came over a few times in the middle of the night when I'd been trying to get him back to sleep for 3 hours and could walk/rock/breastfeed no more!

The advice to see as many people as you can is good.

Hey OP
6 weeks old is a really difficult stage, it was where my tiredness/ baby's colic and crying all peaked at once so you have my sympathy.

If you can nap when baby does, try some distraction such as a tv show to pop on in the background for company/diversion. If you do have family or friends please reach out, ask them to help you for a few hours maybe a relative or friend can come on an evening for an hour or two for company and support.

My husband works away too and it is lonely especially with a baby. You will get through it. take care x

And sod the housework!
Just wipe surfaces with those big disinfectant wipes so you don't catch anything and let the rest go!
If the load of washing takes a day to wash, day to dry, day to fold, that's ok.
The good thing about a newborn is they don't need entertainment or anything other than feed, change, love, and stay where you put them too!
If you can, buy paper plates and plastic spoons - get everything delivered that you can. Anything to make it so all you have to do is look after the baby. If you go out, it's because you want to, no pressure.
Sleep when the baby is asleep. No matter what time it is.
You can do this. You can!

It's really really hard having a newborn! (And a baby in general!) I felt so alone when my partner went back to work, i was scared and stressed! try and make plans with people, chat with people on here when babies sleeping! DH will be home soon ❤️❤️