To want to do Xmas dinner at our house...

[Lauren848]

Hi all, I would really like to do Xmas Dinner for our families at our house this year but husband doesn't want to. I want to invite, his Mum and Dad, my Mum and Dad and siblings. Would be 12 of us if everyone wanted to come. The last 2 years we haven't done anything on Christmas day with extended family and have just had the day the 4 of us (we have 2 children age 7 and 8). This is his choice and would always sooner do Xmas this way.
He just says he doesn't want to won't give another explanation.
AIBU to want to have a big family Xmas Dinner?

It's a lot of work and expense -but if you can afford it and won't get all stressed by doing it - then doing it every so often sounds like a nice way of mixing it up. Unless you could compromise with a boxing day meal instead?

You’re not being unreasonable to want an extended family gathering and he’s not being unreasonable to want just an immediate family one.

Talk together to find out why you both want what you want?

What is unreasonable is not to compromise or, agree to alternate-year arrangements.

You're not unreasonable to want to but it's not just about you. It might be presumptuous anyway if you haven't asked anybody yet, they might not want to come.

He is being unreasonable. You've had two quiet years. It's your turn and you can have a quiet one next year

Otherwise go to your parents house and he can sit home alone.

You say to him, unless you can give me a good reason why not, we need to take it in turns - you had a quiet Christmas last two years, now I want a big family one.

11 or 12 is normal Christmas day for us.

It really isn't that big a deal ime.

Maybe your dh is worried he will be expected to help!

I would be with your husband on this one, too much for me.

Is it just Christmas or does he not want family over any other time of the year either? I think he needs to give you more of an explanation- unless you know of a reason? Does he get on with everyone?