I have a lovely group of friends whom I met at university but don't see very often now. Three of us still live in the same city up north, the other one moved back south after uni. The latter friend is coming up to visit early December and asked us ages ago (I think it was the summer) to keep that weekend free, to which we all agreed. Now our other friend is suddenly saying she will probably be too busy around that time. She has 2 young boys and is a SAHM. Her DH works a lot. I generally like him but from what I've gathered he might be somewhat controlling, and they both seem to be under the impression that he is the more important person in the relationship as he's the one earning the money, and it's her job to take care of the house + kids whilst he works and spends most weekends practising his hobby. Her social circle seems to mainly consist of her DH's friends and mums she meets at playgroup.
I do understand somewhat where she's coming from 'being busy'. Toddlers are tough (my youngest is roughly the same age as her DC). However this is not the first time she's cancelled a meet-up (part of the reason why our other friend asked us months in advance if we could keep that weekend free). We've tried to be accommodating, saying that we can do whatever works for her (e.g. meet near where she lives) and that she can of course bring her DC if unable to get childcare. However, she still claims it will probably be too much for her to meet up. I work fulltime un addition to caring for my children, meaning I'm basically ALWAYS busy and yet I'm still managing to make time for a reunion with old friends. AIBU to think that my friend just isn't that bothered with us anymore, or could there be another reason and do I need to reach out?