Words/phrases you never say…

[Hairybaker]

I see a lot of language on mumsnet and other places that I just can’t imaging myself ever writing/saying.

Some that spring to mind:

Batshit crazy
Yummy
Hubby
Super (as in “that was super tasty”)

All of the above make me shudder. What words/terms do you see used a lot that would never come out of your mouth?!

fur baby
hubby
amazeballs
totes

sounds like being in a kindergarten when I read those

"cheeky" as in "cheeky drink"

I could never ever say, what a load of old tosh you bunch of snobs

One of my dearest friends says "nom" and "eleventy billion" all the time. Makes me cringe sooooo much 🙈

Yes yummy for food is ok. Imo. When people use it to describe little lids, for eg, it cringes me the fuck out!

"Oh look at her. Isn't she yummy" 🤮🤮🤮

(Little kids!)

Referring to your pets as my boy/girl.

It pisses me off to no end when I open MN and see a thread like “My boy died today” - my heart jumps in my throat and then I see it’s posted in The Litter Tray.
Fucking morons honestly, doing that on a predominantly parenting website.

"Making memories" How do you know? You will remember some things and not remember others. How can you possibly know that you are "Going out for the day with this one (ugh) making memories." You can't know in advance which things will become memories. That is definitely a saying I would never use.

Calling oneself/others a "mama" on social media. Especially if the plural is mispelled ("shout out to all you mama's)

Poorly

"Eats" for canapés

Eateries - wtf

Laughing at myself misspelling misspelled

I've said this already this week on another thread but "side hustle".

You don't have a side hustle, you're not in a bloody drama, you just sell stuff on ebay/vinted/Etsy.

Also "call them out" I always imagine someone in lederhosen yodelling on a mountain top.

Parents posting on social media about how “so super proud of DC I am today” The child is too young to even have social media or be able to read! 🙈

I've just read a thread where someone goes on (and on) about "my bestie".

Side hustle gets on my tits as well.

I think people are just trying to sound cool. 🤷🏻‍♀️

You mentioned mine in your opening post… “myself” as in “I can’t ever imagine myself writing/saying”

Isn't that just the reflexive pronoun?

"Mamma" as a substitute for mum/mother/mummy. Particularly when preceded by the word "breastfeeding". Brings me out in hives.

As previously mentioned, singular things that should be double.

A jean
A trouser

Also in the clothing industry, colourway. "Available in 3 colourways; green, brown, black". I call those simply "colours".

Nom nom
Date night
living my best life
got your back
hun
Vino

Yessssss

Sainsbos 🤢

Lush, unless discussing a patch of grass, highly scented bath products or Miki Berenyi.
Sarnie (but am guilty of 'butty').
Describing children as 'stunning' (makes me think of a Page 3 'stunna'), 'delicious' or 'scrumptious' (are you a cannibal?).
Teddy when it isn't a bear (having spent half an hour searching for a lost 'teddy' at work, only to be told it was a monkey)

Moist and I really hate it when people use the word raw to describe how they are feeling . It’s feeling very raw right now 😡. Hollibobs , famalam

Peeps
Baby steps
Boils my piss
You do you
Crying and shaking
Sobbing and shaking

But the vagina is just one part of the vulva. What if you have a problem with your labia for example you don’t want the doctor fishing around in the vagina..
Just a thought..