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AIBU?

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Original poster

Petty argument

28 replies

Champs10 · 23/10/2022 18:52

So today on waking up I asked my dp to make me a cuppa I know he heard but he didn't acknowledge or turn to look at me and put his earphones into his mobile phone to watch cricket.
Anyway 10 mins later I said I asked for a cuppa and you ignored me to which he replied abruptly give me time so I admit I complained to him that he doesn't do anything for me and I always look after him.
He then got up in a strop to make my tea and I told him not to bother as he was doing it to stop me moaning. He bought the tea in and I threw it away which resulted in a argument and he hasn't spoken to me all day.
Whose in the wrong I'm prepared to have my arse handed to me.

OP posts:
Cruisebabe1 · 23/10/2022 18:54

He’s behaving like a child, you only asked for a cup of tea!

Original poster
Champs10 · 23/10/2022 18:55

He gets extremely sensitive abt anything I say

OP posts:
kittycatmice · 23/10/2022 18:57

He is being unreasonable but so are u for throwing it away after asking for it twice. That's childish

Fireflygal · 23/10/2022 19:03

You shouldn't have thrown the tea out. That was petty and very annoying.

I think it depends in how you asked, what he was doing..it obviously would be good if he cared for you and graciously offered to make you a cup of tea but once he did you should have graciously accepted.

WaddleAway · 23/10/2022 19:04

Both petty.

VioletCharlotte · 23/10/2022 19:05

Sorry but why should he have to get up and make you a cuppa? Fair enough if he'd making himself one, but he was chilling in bed. Why not just make your own?

Tomanycarrots · 23/10/2022 19:06

Clearly you have bigger issues than your dp making you tea

Sounds pretty ridiculous it even happened tbh

Darbs76 · 23/10/2022 19:07

If you’re both in bed why does he have to go down and get you a cup of tea? If you want one, get it. I think you are very unreasonable and petty beyond belief to then throw it away after guilt tripping him into making it

Ekátn · 23/10/2022 19:08

Both sound ridiculous.

user1471457751 · 23/10/2022 19:09

Why should he have to get out of bed to make you tea? Either wait until he was ready to get up or get it yourself. I wouldn't be impressed if my partner tried kicking me out of bed just to make them tea. And I would be very angry if they then decided to chuck it away in a childish strop.

Brigante9 · 23/10/2022 19:09

No way would I ask my DH to get up and make me tea, that’s pretty outrageous to expect him to get up to get you tea. Get a ruddy Teasmaid!

TeaPleaseNoLemon · 23/10/2022 19:09

This reply has been deleted

Previously banned poster - This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Original poster
Champs10 · 23/10/2022 19:09

Because I get out of bed most mornings to make him a drink and breakfast and prepare his sandwiches for the day.
Today I was at work so wanted similar attention.

OP posts:
kimchifix · 23/10/2022 19:10

Why didn't you make your own tea? If he was up and doing it anyway I would get this, but you were both lying in bed, you wanted tea, he wanted to watch cricket. And then you got what you wanted but threw it away because he only did it because you asked him to. Eh?!? This is a bit bonkers. If you want someone to do things for you this probably isn't the way to go.

kimchifix · 23/10/2022 19:11

Alright, just seen your update. So this isn't about today, it's about the fact that you do things for him and he can't be bothered to reciprocate.

Original poster
Champs10 · 23/10/2022 19:11

It was him not acknowledging then putting earphones in that got my back up

OP posts:
Original poster
Champs10 · 23/10/2022 19:12

He works hard I know but at home he is unproductive and sits in bed with earphones in.

OP posts:
kimchifix · 23/10/2022 19:13

Which does sound a bit shit so why don't you just stop making his drinks and his lunch if he doesn't see the point you were making this morning.

Ekátn · 23/10/2022 19:14

Champs10 · 23/10/2022 19:09

Because I get out of bed most mornings to make him a drink and breakfast and prepare his sandwiches for the day.
Today I was at work so wanted similar attention.

You get out of bed, just to make him a new, breakfast and a packed lunch? When you could be in bed? Why?

Or you are up and doing this?

I make dp a brew every morning as I am first up. I make him a drink as I am getting to leave and wake him up. I don’t expect him to get up if I am working and he isn’t and is relaxing in bed. If he is up first (rare) then he would make a brew.

Original poster
Champs10 · 23/10/2022 19:14

He said if I cook for him he will just throw it away and he would rather die as he is no good to me then he walked out of the house and said I may not see him again.

OP posts:
Original poster
Champs10 · 23/10/2022 19:17

I've done so much more for this man than just his drinks or sandwiches without going into detail.

OP posts:
Aprilx · 23/10/2022 19:19

Champs10 · 23/10/2022 19:17

I've done so much more for this man than just his drinks or sandwiches without going into detail.

Why don’t you ask for advice on that then? Instead you come up with a making tea scenario in which on its own, you were quite clearly being totally unreasonable.

Original poster
Champs10 · 23/10/2022 19:19

I especially get up on a day off to look after him as his work is hard graft. I also get tired I have health issues and I said to him you say you love me but I don't see actions only words so he replied by saying I don't know how to show it.

OP posts:
Dacadactyl · 23/10/2022 19:20

If my husband threw out a cup of tea that id made, when he had made a fuss about getting it from me, i would hit the roof.

I think behaved rudely in the first instance and then you upped the ante considerably. Im not surprised hes gome out. You should be apologising profusely to him.

Dacadactyl · 23/10/2022 19:21

Champs10 · 23/10/2022 19:09

Because I get out of bed most mornings to make him a drink and breakfast and prepare his sandwiches for the day.
Today I was at work so wanted similar attention.

And he is not a mind reader. If this is what you want, you should mention it in advance.