To be completely overwhelmed and ask for help

[FrazzledKoala]

I’m a 30 year old woman living alone and my diet resembles that of a 17 year old who’s been left to their own devices for the first time.

I need/want to eat healthier but I try to meal plan/go to the supermarket and end up completely overwhelmed at not knowing where to start. Throw in trying to do this on a very small budget, plus gas/electric costs where I’m trying to make things that are quick and that’s how I end up having toast for dinner most nights. It feels like a Venn diagram but none of the circles overlap - everything is cheap, but unhealthy, or healthy but takes hours to cook.

To those of you with your lives together, how do you try and balance all these things? Where do you start? AIBU to just need someone to show me the basics at my age?

Could you get Gousto or Hello Fresh or similar for a few weeks?

So youbwantbquick healthy food and, I assume, you are happy with quite simple food (based on fact you eat toast and get overwhelmed?)

Start small. 2 obvious options are pasta dishes and v basic grilled/fried things with veggies. Eg spaghetti bolognaise is simple although does need an hour to simmer, and adding additional veg with the onions such as chopped peppers, chopped mushrooms etc is easy. Also, a packet of mince would do a fee meals so you could have spaghetti bolognaise on day 1, then give yourself a break with mince on toast on day 2! Then freeze the other two or three portions for the following week.

Grilled sausages with mashed potatoes and frozen peas is v simple, quick and again, for a single person one night cooking could do 2-3 days.

Do an online shop rather than in person if it overwhelms you. Stock up on things like frozen veg which can easily be microwaved and add a quick bit of nutrition to whatever you eat. Peas, carrots, beans, cauliflower all good.

What about soup? A pot of soup made in day 1 would feed you for a few days and/or give you individual portions you could freeze? Again, easy, nutritious ans v simple.

Certain veg lend themselves to easy pasta dishes. Tomatoes, obviously. But also courgettes, aubergines, spinach, leeks, peas, with or without small amounts of meat.

Do you like smoked.salmon or.smoked.mackerel? Salmon is expensive but a small portion with scrambled eggs is nicer (mil adds corn, which i find weird but kids love). I had smoked mackerel for lunch this week with boiled new potatoes and broccoli.

Probably not if OP is on a very small budget!!

OP

How about starting with something like porridge with (frozen) fruit for breakfasts then things like jacket potatoes with simple fillings (beans and cheese) or omelettes (lots of protein, cheap and easy/quick!)

Lentils and oats, cheap and healthy

I had a similar conversation years ago with a friend who had chronic fatigue. She settled on fresh soups and a protein shake with toast or pasta if she was hungry.

Make a list of all the things you enjoy eating, or would like to eat. Use recipe books or online good food etc for ideas.

Make a plan for the week/month and add in a few of these things

Look at what’s left and see if you can make it healthier/cheaper/less oven based/quicker etc. Add this to the list

Make a shopping list. As much as possible, try and buy in bulk if you can store it.

I used to cook double portions and freeze one or have it for lunch so take that in to account with the meal plan or the list.

frozen veg can be a lifesaver - one of my fave quick meals is dried noodles, they take maybe 3-4 mins to boil. flash fry some frozen green beans and/or peas, maybe throw in some diced onion and a bit of garlic. salt, pepper, soy sauce or stir fry sauce to taste.
yummy, healthy, 6 mins tops!
other than that, batch cooking can be brilliant as it takes the stress of meal planning and puts it into one afternoon then you don't have to think again for another week.

But a big bag of potatoes You can mash
Roast
Jacket spud
Bag of frozen veg
Different things to go with for each day. It's really simple and won't cost much
Things to go with
Pie
Chicken
Chicken Kiev
Fish

Also big bag of stir fry is the easiest thing just buy a sachet of stir fry sauce and throw it all in with prawns or chicken

It depends on what a small budget is.

I have had a shit few years and out on weight. I feel so overwhelmed with everything food prep etc is something I just can’t face And ended up snacking most of the time on crap food.

I started just making sure I had a proper meal. Mainly prepackaged foods. Like Aldi prepacked chicken Caesar salad. There’s different ones. I used to nip in every couple of days and get some and they were my tea. They are about £1.59. Or the Aldi veg frittata with some salad and a bit of feta olive oil. Really quick. Frittata heats up in the microwave. Some lettuce, cucumber and peppers and put the rest on.

Then I got fed up of that and moved on to meals that involved slightly more effort. Some straight to wok noodles, with stir fried veg and chicken. Again, quick. The amount of meat depended on how hungry I was and budget.

I just worked my way up to actually cooking meals again.

I always have in mind to write a recipe book along these lines - budget, ease and speed along with things my boy will eat, and an easy shopping list to refer to! But everyone has different needs and tastes, so you just have to put the work in to find what works for you.

What I go for is:

• jacket potatoes with beans/tuna/cheese and salad (personally I think an hour oven on once a week is fine but do in the microwave if you’re worried)
• fish like sea bass (12 minutes in the pan with a bit of butter) or salmon (20 minutes in the oven, put foil underneath so no mess). Look out for offers like 2 salmon fillets for £3.50 or two packs of 2 for £6 - just make sure you find packs with long dates on them. Serve with rice and salad - fish is a bit pricey but very good for you, and rice and salad are as cheap as chips so not too bad overall. Go for dark leafy salad as better for you.
• Tuna pasta dish - chop an onion and fry in pan, add a tin of tuna, tin of chopped tomatoes and tin of sweetcorn (get the tuna when it’s on offer and buy own brand sweetcorn. Tomatoes are always cheap). Grate some cheese in for flavour and extra protein. Serve with leftover dark leafy salad. My boy wouldn’t eat this because onions! But it fed me for 3-4 meals - just pop leftovers in portion sized tubs and heat in the microwave 3-4 mins until piping hot.
• make a fruit salad - tin of chopped pineapple and add chopped apple, orange, grapes. Ad lib as you wish (no banana or squishy fruit). Keep in the fridge and this will do you for breakfast/puddings for a couple of days.
• soup and toast, beans on toast , crackers with soft cheese and cucumber/grapes are all perfectly acceptable evening meals (crackers and cheese feels decadent and junky!) - I find some nights I don’t want a big dinner and these can easily be kept in cupboard/fridge as backup quick meals.
• banana on toast and porridge (grate in apple and add a handful of sultanas) are great filling breakfasts.

No point making your own soup when you live alone unless you can freeze portions, as the same flavour all the time gets boring! I get a pot of fresh soup from the fridge section, look for offers as they keep for weeks.

Don't bother with Gousto and Hello Fresh - their recipes are so much faff when you live on your own and they use so much store cupboard stuff that’s expensive. They’re good if you get a box on a cheap introductory offer just to get you out of a rut and trying new flavours.

Focus on meals that are balanced and have good protein as these will give you proper lasting energy and you’ll feel good. Gradually wean yourself off sugar and junk alongside that, and you’ll stop having highs/crashes where you need to binge eat or eat immediately to compensate. True hunger comes on gradually and will allow you time to cook a meal.

Greek meze (keep your eyes open for Lidl Greek week): tinned stuffed vine leaves, houmous, salad, halloumi (griddled on a griddle pan if you have one, dry fried if not). Variations are endless.

Stir fry with straight to wok noodles: takes 10 minutes.

I was in your shoes and there's some good advice on the thread . What's worked for me is meal planning so that I cook once big enough for three portions . I also eat two meals a day rather than three . I snack on fruits / crackers / cheese if needed , fresh soups are great to use up leftover veg and jacket potatoes are filling and offer a variety of fillings .

If you are struggling financially, put the Too Good to Go app on your phone and every couple of days, see if anywhere near you has a bag to buy. They are normally£3-4 and contain food that needs to be sold by that day. Much of it can be frozen. There are often sandwiches that can be used for next day lunch, and we have had meat,ready meals,fruit , soup ,bread, pizza etc etc. Great way to eat in a budget and you have to try and be creative with what is in the bag

I second trying too good to go. Also, staples for me when I'm exhausted are straight to wok noodles with a massive handful of spinach and a tin of tuna or mackerel. Add soy sauce. Delicious and super quick. Or frozen salmon fillet done in the oven with rice (use microwave pouches if you can't face making it) and frozen broccoli. Add some butter on the broccoli.

I've got codes for a free simply cook box and 65%off gusto if anyone wants them. Just DM me. They've been life savers while I've had Covid.

Hi @FrazzledKoala

It is hard to get started if you're not sure what to buy or how to combine xyz to make a meal. You'll get loads of good ideas here, but it might add to your confusion!

First off...

What kind of stuff do you like or is there anything you hate? Anything you buy that you'd like to be able to make yourself e.g a ready meal you'd like to try from scratch

Any intolerances?

What is your set up, do you have freezer space, microwave, oven and hob?

What is your budget - don't need exact figs but are you able to afford a once off bigger shop to stock up on some basics, that will last a few weeks, or do you need to stick to smaller baskets of shopping?

Do you have time to cook every day, or do you need to stick to quick meals that you can reheat? Do you have a day where you can spend more time e.g. on Saturday you have time to cook a few dinners for next week?

Happy to share some ideas of what we make most weeks, but they might not suit your set up, which is why I ask the above 😊

If you eat a lot of toast, maybe start off with 'something' on toast.

Eg. scrambled eggs, beans, tuna mayo.

With scrambled eggs you can then start jazzing it up with mushrooms, spinach etc.

I would suggest batch cooking.

set aside sometime maybe once a week to begin with, go do your shop and then come home and cook, you can maybe make two meals. You can then freeze in individual portions. Overtime you will build up a decent amount of meals.

recipes I think freeze well are;

• chicken curry
• casseroles / stews
• bolognese / tomato sauce
• chilli
• soups

It is hard when you live alone though. Even though I knew the basics of cooking when I lived alone I too would often just have toast or cereal for dinner. But seriously, eggs. Making an omlette with lots of veg in it is another easy, healthy option.

It does depend on what you like to eat. My favourite cheap, fast, meal is noodles. Pack of cheap noodles from supermarket 20p ish. Couple of handfuls of frozen veg 20p ish (bag is £1). Cook noodle and veg together. Turn off heat and whisk through an egg which will cook in the remaining heat. Splash of soy or teriyaki sauce to finish.

I do keep an eye out for cheap protien to add with a yellow sticker. Prawns, cooked chicken, salmon anything really.

If you have the freezer space buy a slow cooker and batch cook
There's lots of simple recipes for stews, chilli etc
Literally throw everything in and bulk out with lentils/veg, you just need to make sure there's enough liquid, portion up and freeze
Cheaper cuts of meat work well, chicken thighs
Put some music on, take your time reading a recipe and before you know it you'll have a lovely meal in front of you

I’m just like you! The only thing I’ve found that works for me is Gousto. It’s not madly expensive either and you’d get 8 meals out of it.

Wow, I was not expecting this many responses - thank you all so much for the tips/advice, it has been so helpful (I’m writing a shopping list as we speak). Going to try and do some batch cooking this afternoon to see me through the next few days when I’m at work