To refuse to go to this work meeting?

[Hokusaijp]

Currently working my notice period for a relatively new job that I absolutely hate (going back to previous employer). My main reason for leaving is due to the unrealistic expectations and pressure I’ve been under, as the role turns out to be about 3 full time jobs and it’s just not physically possible to do it. Leadership are aware but allegedly have no budget for extra resource, hence leaving for the sake of my well-being (there’s an expectation to regularly work until the early hours of the morning).

I’m senior management and have a monthly meeting with the board where I must present on the progress I’ve made in a certain area of my job (not my main role). Each time I’ve attended the meetings, I’ve been made to feel stressed, anxious and belittled. Any progress I make is never ever enough and I leave each meeting feeling worthless.

I am now one week away from finishing with the company and the monthly meeting with the board is due. I have no progress to present since last meeting, as I was asked to focus completely on finishing other work before my departure. Yet still the board want me to attend anyway, despite having nothing new to present, which makes me feel as though I’ll be attending purely for another bashing, particularly as I’ve heard they are not happy that I’m resigning so soon.

Would it BU to refuse to attend the meeting? DH feels I have no choice but to suck it up 😭

Board meetings are about good governance and as senior management, even if you hate the job, it’s a core responsibility. Even if your only update is to say “progress on Project Bajingo continues as usual, the hold up as reported on Project Viking remains the same as I reported at the last meeting due to lack of resource; my advice is that Management focus should be on X and Y as a priority in Q4; nothing more to add” then you’ve done your piece and made sure that you’ve handed over correctly, allowing Board and Management oversight of all the issues.

If they challenge you on anything then you can just simply repeat along the lines of “this is my last week with the company and I’m completing my handover, this is a question for my successor, I can’t comment on how they might choose to address the problem.”

The progress is that you've finished everything they asked you to and prepared an orderly handover for everything else. You run through that with confidence and at the end, thank them all for the opportunity, say although the role wasn't for you, the people have been lovely. Publicly thank your manager for their support etc. Give everyone the good feeling that you've wound everything up nicely and there is no problem with the role, the management or the organisation, even if the whole thing is a sticking turd.

If they start to be shitty, cut them off - cheerily say you don't think it's worth going through all that now, you'll deal with it in your exit interview (they'll quiet down, no one wants to be called out in that), and anyway, the fact you're going back to your previous company says it all.

Keep it light, professional and remember you're out the door so you don't really give a flying fuck what the fuckers think!

You need to go
Remain professional to the end and you might actually enjoy it given that none of it is your problem any more

The progress is that:

a) you have decided to leave
b) you are able to provide feedback on the role workload and poor job design
c) you are able to provide insight into their onboarding and probation arrangements

Yes you need to go, it is a reasonable request of your employer. Give them an update of how you are leaving things, what is done, what possible next steps are.

This.

Go to the meeting and use it to your advantage.

Attend and give them the dressing down of their lives if they start on at you.

I'd go and present on your reasons for "having" to leave, for the benefit of the company/whoever follows.

Absolutely no reason for you come out of this last meeting feeling worthless. It really doesn't matter.

Wow people here have high expectations! I’m in the SLT and honestly in the same situation I’d develop a bad stomach bug and be unable to travel…

Of course you need to go. It's a part of your job role and you're still working there and being paid.

Any crap that comes your way should roll of your back as you know that you're outta there and don't need to really take any of it on board. Just respond with a 'There's no benefit to going into that here, send me an e-mail and I'll take a look before my final day'

It's unprofessional to decide you won't follow through with your job while you're still employed there, and you don't know that you won't end up working with/under any of these people in the future. Plus in some industries word travels fast. Don't give them another reason to think badly of you.

The thought had certainly passed my mind 😅

I think you should go as others have said.

Alternatively, a few drops of orange juice on a Covid test might be just what you need 😁

I certainly think you should go. You're leaving soon & it's a key part of your role. I'm assuming you'd like to be paid until the end?

I’m in a very similar situation actually. Got a big meeting coming up while working my notice. I will likely get one of my team to go as a ‘development opportunity’….

Yes this.

Its about confirming you have done a solid handover and signing off.

If you are criticised, you have a few stock phrases ‘this is what I’d suggest to make things more workable in future.

Surely you go, state there’s been absolutely no progress due to the lack of resources and suggest that they address that urgently so your successor can have a chance or history will repeat itself

suggest going…

State that all activities have been on hold due to lack of funding and resource

One new issue to flag to the board: role x is vacant as of (your departure date)

end of update.

If they ask more about progress, just reiterate that there’s been no resource allocated towards these efforts. All available capacity (including overtime) was used up on other priorities.

If they ask you to pick up anything in your last week, state that you will log the action and try to get to it, and any open actions will be taken forward by the new owner once assigned.

It is an opportunity to let others know why you are leaving. If you have not done so already.

I mean you probably should go but assuming you have another job to go to I’d be tempted to sack it off. Think most people would if they were honest.

Personally I'm of the life is too short to give a shit about bullshit like this. I'd say you are unable to attend (what are they going to do, sack you?!) but you're happy to provide a written update for the board.

"As previously agreed there is no budget for x and it was agreed Y would be parked due to lack of resource. There is no other update as the post holder leaves on xxx date"

If you know they are likely to bully and upset you, why put yourself in that position again? I would definitely make a last minute excuse of illness and not go.

I agree with others that if you have some replies prepared, this could be quite fun. I'd go and hold my head up high. Remember, these people are not reliable sources for your self-worth assessment and should be discounted accordingly.

If you are feeling brave, I'd use it as an excuse to host your own exit interview on the ways in which they've failed to properly resources the role and your advice for them moving forwards.

If you aren't feeling brave, you've got a migraine but you've managed to write up an email summarising all the points from the last meeting which is the last progress made.

UGH! The vile corporate world... cannot wait to leave myself. Pleased to hear you get to! Not at all in a senior role (nor would i ever ever ever want to be) i see the daily stress managers, senior managers and executive leaders are under and often have to share their burden...cannot understand what possesses anyone to stay in these types of roles that simply eat away at your mental health. Just one- up-man-ship all the time. They complain daily as well. No amount of money is worth that not to mention time away from family. I guess attend the meeting, its the last one and you can rest assured you behaved absolutely correctly till the very end! (sorry was a bit ranty) good luck!!!!