To wonder why men work in gynecology?

[CustardC]

Genuine question, my sisters and I were discussing our most recent smear tests and sister 1 commented on how her nurse was male. I've always asked for a female when I book a smear or any type of gyne issues and it's always been respected, but it got me thinking...if there are any men here who work in that field, why?

I'm fully prepared for the backlash that ill probably get but honest question👍

I think this too. I had a very upsetting in ident when going through a miscarriage with a male who had to do a vaginal scan. I didn't even realise men would do them so didn't request female only staff.
I have zero problem seeing a male doctor but this made me feel the most uncomfortable I had felt in my life, made me wonder do men realise that they might make women feel uncomfortable in that job, could they not have chosen a different healthcare role. The worst bit is he kept getting it wrong and a lady was behind him shouting left left left and he was jabbing around.
I know it sounds almost comical but I cried for days afterwards. I can't explain it as I'm usually fine around men but this was a terrible intimate experience to go through. The worst bit was I went back the following week and tbh I wasn't all there because of the miscarriage and had to go through it a second time. I didn't complain or anything because I just wanted all of it to be over and behind me but for me I'd be happier if men avoided these roles. I know I don't speak for everyone though.

Good point I hadn't even thought of that. We can't assume all women would want the job.

@ancientgran Yes that's another way of looking at it - that you miss out on excellent men by excluding them, and there is an overall shortage anyway so we don't want that either. I guess we've also missed out on excellent women for centuries and ended up with some very average men in all areas of life too.

I do think though that men are sometimes given an easier ride or more credit for doing the same job. In my field of publishing, which is dominated by women, a man is automatically given more publicity, better reviews, seen as more of a great artist than a woman writing the exact same book.

Not that it was the OP's question, and sorry to derail, but I just wonder if there's something similar going on here.

I agree with you though that male doctors tend to be one extreme or the other, and the good ones are often lovely. It's interesting what you say about the younger female doctors, though - someone i know is a nurse in Oz and she says that the dominance there of very privileged, entitled, super competitive students getting into medicine and currently starting their careers means that many of them are absolutely hopeless at patient care – it's just not part of their schooling or their upbringing. And that is an issue. As may have been the case with the one you dealt with, who sounds horrendous.

Has anyone said they prefer men ? I'm not sure they have. A number of posters have said they have no preference and some posters have given examples of better treatment from men. I don't think anyone has said male doctors are automatically better

What puzzles me is the assumption by some posters that female doctors will be more sympathetic because of the shared experience of being women. There is definitely an assumption by some posters that female doctors will be better just because they are women.

From my personal experience the female doctor specialising in women's health who I saw about increasingly heavy periods in my mid 40s was unsympathetic and offered only the option of a long term hormonal contraceptive implant. She told me all the drawbacks and when I asked if it could be removed early if I reacted badly actually said - these things cost money- the NHS can't spend money and you then just change your mind.

The obvious solution for someone in their mid 40s with no intention of getting pregnant was endometrial ablation. She never mentioned it. The male consultant offered it and solved the problem.

I still have no preference which sex of doctor I see.

We were having a conversation at work recently about men's innate self-confidence and their 'fake it til you make it' mentality. Led by my male colleagues who self-diagnosed themselves as being far more prone to bullshitting than the women.

I wonder whether this manifests itself particularly acutely in doctors and the female doctors have to put aside the modesty that is perhaps more typical in women. Not saying it's a good thing, just an observation.

I saw a female breast surgeon recently and she was everything I'd want in a doctor. Supremely confident without being arrogant, very personable and chatty. Same for my male orthopaedic surgeon. It's quite a skill to balance both and you don't want their modesty to come across as self-doubt.

I remember seeing a lovely young male doctor when pregnant with my last baby.

He was hopeful that she would turn at 37 weeks, and told me to get out walking..

Me: will I feel baby turning? Will it hurt?

Him: ummmm.. I have no idea. 😂

As it turns out.. she did turn, I didn't notice at all and I still needed a section.

But it made me laugh, he just shrugged his shoulders and gave me look of "I've read the books but honestly, I don't know."

I really liked him.

What puzzles me is the assumption by some posters that female doctors will be more sympathetic because of the shared experience of being women. There is definitely an assumption by some posters that female doctors will be better just because they are women.

This. I’ve had a female GP being dismissive of my menopause symptoms.

@TheLassWiADelicateAir Good point. I've had some horrible female doctors too, including one who was very dismissive of my mastitis which turned out to be a huge abscess, which was then drained by a very sympathetic and kind man. She was a mother of four and didn't seem to have a lot of patience for me struggling with half that number.

I don't know. If I take anything from this thread it's going to be praying that I can away from hospital for as long as possible, being sick and at the mercy of whoever you get is terrifying.

I did have a funny run in with a young female doctor. She came to go through paperwork and consent before my op (hysterectomy) and asked about family history. I said my paternal grandmother died of ovarian cancer. She looked at me in disgust and in a very patronising way explained that paternal meant male so I couldn't have a paternal grandmother. Through laughter I explained that I had two grandmothers, my mother's mother who was my maternal grandmother and my father's mother who was my paternal grandmother. She looked absolutely furious, didn't speak again and slammed her folder shut as she marched off.

The thought of her screwed up angry face still makes me laugh as it was so bizarre. At least she did learn something that day.

In an ideal world, doctors, politicians, teachers and the police would be selected for having the right qualities for the job. Sadly, in a world where careers are self-selected, training places will be taken by people who lack the qualities we would like to see in public servants.
As lots of nursing graduates have found, training the minimum number of medics to be able to assimilate large quantities of data, be decisive under pressure means that a proportion will switch to more lucrative or less onerous jobs.

The trouble is we don't all share the same experiences just because we are women. I can sympathise with your menopause symptoms but although I have been through the menopause I didn't have any symptoms other than my periods stopped so I don't share your experience.

Unless you want to count the almost 100% ending of a lifetime of migraines which sort of makes me view the menopause quite positively based on my experience which is probably unusual.

As far as shared experience goes I'd be no more use than a man.

@ancientgran Oh that is hilarious! Imagine being that confident in your own brilliance and then being corrected by a mere patient.

I had another very young doctor, when I had pneumonia and a newborn, tell me I should pour all my expressed milk away as i was 'poorly.' She must have slept through the lecture on antibodies.

I had a Gyne issue where I was clotting then bleeding really heavily. I only bled once a day it'd be so bad I couldn't leave the toilet til it finished with clots coming out so I went to A&E where the male doc told me i was wasting his time and it was just a period and to go home! I insisted it was not a period it was bright red and you don't just bleed once a day on a period I've had them for 25 years and he'd never had one - I told him he was wrong but he refused to do anything else -fast forward two weeks it's still going on and I'm passing out (lack of oxygen to my brain it turned out) again went A&E passed out in the waiting room was put in a trolley and left in corridor for 5 hours! Got sent up to gyne ward where saw same doctor who again said it was a period til he got my blood results back and saw that the oxygen levels in my blood were dangerously low (bright red blood is oxygenated blood which is the reason I was passing out) I had to have 2 emergency blood transfusions and surgery to stop the bleeding turned out my artery had fused with the blood vessels serving my womb after a pregnancy loss and so my artery was bleeding into my womb! If he'd have done a blood test when I first went in he would have seen my oxygen levels were low and could have done some gong then by the time he believed me they were dangerously low!

I was incredibly grateful for the male nurse who helped deliver my baby when she was stuck. I didn't care one bit he was a man. And this nurse actually came back to see us when he was finishng his shift to check how we were and have a hold of my daughter.

Men can add a huge amount of value and resource in this area, just as women can. I understand they don't fully "get it" but I'd never feel uncomfortable about a man doing my smear etc. Insinuating all these men that are doing it is for some twisted reason is like saying female medics working for a men's football team are all doing it to perve and feel up the footballers.

@MummyBear2cubs you poor thing. 😮
I do hope when you recovered from that horrendous ordeal that you let both doctors know how wrong they were.

My mother qualified as a doctor in the 1950s. She didn't ever become a consultant because she chose to work part time in community medicine.

Sorry posted in the wrong place and I don't know how to move it 🙄

My ghastly failed pipelle biopsy with no pain relief was attempted by a male gynaecologist who did not tell me what it would involve, lied about how painful it could be and swept out of the room when the female nurse got him to stop, without a word to me, leaving her to deal with my shocked, trembling, bleeding aftermath. I have always stated my requirements for smear tests to be done by a member of the female sex and I think I just assumed that I would see a female gynae. I was a bit taken aback and very uncomfortable before it even started. Being told how something would feel by someone who a was knowingly lying to me, and b had zero experience of it made me so angry I did a formal complaint. But I have heard horror stories about female gynaes, nurses and midwives, tho.

Report your own post and ask MN to delete it in the report. Retype it where it was meant to be posted.

My friend and his wife are both Obs & Gynae consultants. I would trust either of them with my life. They are both professional, knowledgeable, diligent and caring. One has a penis, one doesn’t. I don’t see that making a difference.
I’d probably be a bit embarrassed at either of them having to treat me, which is ridiculous- as I know I wouldn’t have that issue if they needed to look at my ears (for example.)

I d have thought what matters is the quality of care?

If i'm poorly, i want to get better, thats it.

The NHS has 7.1m and rising waiting for treatment, i wont be getting on my high horse if i get treated for any condition by a male health worker.

There simply isn't the number of female staff to give same sex care & demanding it, takes time, time they could be seeing someone else, who isn't being silly.

Otherwise go private?

Someone with a history of trauma who would like a female provider, or someone making the request for cultural reasons is hardly ‘on their high horse’ or ‘being silly’. Everyone should have a choice as to who performs highly invasive procedures on them. Forcing someone to have a male provider when it would be harmful to them could well have a detrimental psychological impact. Ultimately, that could place more strain on the NHS than requesting a female provider would. Why should someone go private when they have contributed to the NHS for years just because they are trying to safeguard their mental well-being?

Thanks

My brother in law lost his grandmother, mother, aunt and two older sisters to childbirth. That’s why he became one. His male colleagues went into it for similar reasons. It is a noble profession.