To think I'm not middle class

[Belte]

I'm a single mum, currently on benefits and have 2 DC by 2 different fathers. I feel no shame, as my financial situation isn't forever and I know I'm a great mum who tries my best. My mum, however, clearly does feel shame. 😂 She went to boarding school and is from quite a well to do background and insists that although I'm currently in the situation I'm in, I am middle class, as she raised me a certain way, I talk properly and I'm not like the "other" single mothers. 😂 I told her I'm probably considered the underclass at the moment as I knew how much it would wind her up and I secretly quite enjoy it. 😁 I don't give a flying fuck about class, by the way. But AIBU to say, I'm definitely NOT middle class (anymore)?

No, I agree with you. Do you work, as if so I would say working class. If nit I would say lower class. I dint mean that in a rude way at all. If the children's father(s) support you and the children then my opinion would differ.

If your mother wanted you to share her values she probably should have sent you to boarding school to

Hi! I don't currently work, as my baby is only 3 months old. I think you're right that at the moment, I'm lower class. Sorry mum 😄

If you don't care about class, I'd stop concerning yourself about it .

It really is only the middle classes who are obsessed with class. Nobody else cares one way or the other.

It really is only the middle classes who are obsessed with class. Nobody else cares one way or the other.

I’m not so sure.

I had a conversation with a working class man the other day. I know he was working class because he told me so at the end of every other sentence.

I don't think your mum is middle-class either

She's clearly very concerned

LMC at best

But, I think you do actually feel a bit of shame. Otherwise you wouldn't be mentioning it.

Are you completely OK with your situation?

It's entirely possible to be a single mother to two children by different fathers and do very well. It's hard though. And not ideal.

What's your plan? Because you need one.

I have a colleague who, like me, was brought up on a council estate. She is a professional with a Phd and I have had a degree of success in life.
The difference is that I don't feel the need to wave my working class credentials constantly. I'm not sure why she does it but I doubt if it cuts any ice with most working class people.

Your mum is clearly a snobby twat. I’d refuse to talk about it with her. You’re living your life raising your children, that’s all there is to it.

This ^^ one million times over.

It's just yet another thread where someone wants others to tell them what class they are, whilst pretending not to care.

Only on Mumsnet 🙄

I doubt your mum feels shame; probably more disappointment and sadness for you, and clumsily attempts to try and make things feel more positive with the idea that you’d background puts you in good standing to improve your life. I imagine most parents want more for their children than for them to be claiming benefits, having made the same mistake twice, with the second time being that the baby’s father left presumably before the baby was even born. It’s not exactly what anyone aspires to, I’m sure you didn’t.

And I‘ve never really seen the point of caring what class other people think you are. How does what other people are thinking in their heads about your class status affect or impact you in any way at all? You don’t know about it and their thoughts don’t change anything at all about your life.

I suppose it depends on one’s definition of class.
The responses here seem to equate class with wealth, or current financial circumstances let’s say, personally I don’t see it that way.
For instance, I know a couple who studied music at Oxford university, they play in classical orchestras, their home is filled with books and art but they are penniless and live in a council house. I definitely do not regard them am working class.
Likewise there are many Essex T.V celebrities for example who have accumulated a small fortune, their children attend private schools but they are still absolutely working class (and proud to be.)
Thoughts?

Yep. Sounds like you are as keen to assert your working class ‘credentials’ every bit as much as your mum is trying to reject them, OP.