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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Cat and mouse

26 replies

montysmythe · 16/10/2022 10:16

I have lived with my partner for 7yrs and 5 of those have been as a cat owner.

The cat spends most of the time in the house but uses a cat flat to leave the house occasionally. The cat is perfect in pretty much every way (doesn't scratch, loves hanging out, happy not to hang out, very friendly) but can be a bit greedy and noisy around feeding time. The other night he went out through the cat flap (the cat not my partner) and returned with a mouse that he had caught and killed. He was playing about with it on the parquet floor in the dining room before eating it. This is the first time he has done this in 5yrs.

I said to my partner that the cat can no longer use the catflap and have put a bin in the way to prevent the cat using it. My partner thinks this is unfair on the cat but I'm not prepared to have a mouse in the house.

I have told my partner, that I will be withholding my share of the mortgage (circa £8000 pcm) if he allows the cat to use the cat flap again.

Am I being unreasonable?

OP posts:
Sandysandwich · 16/10/2022 10:19

Whatever your feeling on catflaps and mice, it is weird and childish behaviour to withold rent money over a disagreement. For that YABU

PrettyMuchBollocks · 16/10/2022 10:20

If you’re paying £8000 a month for your mortgage you can afford to hire someone to wait by the catflap to refuse entry to any mice (or you could get one of the smart catflaps that will block a cat from entering when it has something dodgy in its mouth).

Original poster
montysmythe · 16/10/2022 10:21

That should have been £800pcm not £8,000

OP posts:
mrstea301 · 16/10/2022 10:22

YABU. Your cat is just... being a cat!! You might not like it, but I'm not sure why you think it would be reasonable to withhold the rent to punish your partner for it? I feel there's a big backstory coming...

Dotcheck · 16/10/2022 10:23

Get a cat flap which won’t open if the cat has something in its mouth

yerdaindicatesonbends · 16/10/2022 10:24

This cannot be real.

countvoncount · 16/10/2022 10:25

This has me laughing 😂 no way is this real!

OnaBegonia · 16/10/2022 10:28

Your DP should shut the door on you, this cannot be real.
The mouse was dead not scurrying about the house.

MaisyMary77 · 16/10/2022 10:29

At least it wasn’t alive…. My cat bought a live baby rat in the other day, then let it loose in my bathroom. Poor little thing didn’t seem to be injured but was terrified. My cat just shrugged off all responsibility and left me to deal with it.

FistFullOfRegrets · 16/10/2022 10:29

Dotcheck · 16/10/2022 10:23

Get a cat flap which won’t open if the cat has something in its mouth

Can you???

MrsToothyBitch · 16/10/2022 10:29

You're being ridiculous and unfair. If you have a cat, you have to accept they might do things like this; just because he hasn't done this before/hasn't brought the mouse in before, doesn't it hasn't happened or won't happen again. You're effectively demanding that the cat stops catting. YABU.

Also blocking off an in use cat flap won't make your cat an indoor cat. It will lead to frustration, damage and problems if the cat is an outdoor toiletter.

FistFullOfRegrets · 16/10/2022 10:34

You're bonkers. Cats catting. It'll probably end up toileting on the carpet if you lock off the cat flap.

MeghansBitch · 16/10/2022 10:46

FFS seriously 😳 lucky to be worried about such shit

Brefugee · 16/10/2022 10:48

YABU.
However what you are VU about is withholding your part of the mortgage? That isn't how conflict resolution works.

Maybe your partner should live with the cat and find a more reasonable (grown up) person to live with?

pictish · 16/10/2022 10:50

we have three cats who all occasionally bring in prey…think your reaction is disproportionate and bizarre tbh…

Rosewaterblossom · 16/10/2022 10:57

Withholding money or threatening to if your partner doesn't do as you say is surely abusive behaviour. It's putting them on eggshells with a fear of losing their home if you withhold mortgage funds.

musicforthesoul · 16/10/2022 10:58

This is a bad joke right? The cat is just being a cat.

Unanananana · 16/10/2022 10:59

Its a cat. Thats what it does.

Merryoldgoat · 16/10/2022 10:59

YAB stupid.

januarysalesmania · 16/10/2022 11:03

This is what cats do! I'm really hope HV this is lighthearted.
A friend of mine used to have a cat that regularly dragged home half-dead squirrels Envy

mangoj · 16/10/2022 11:05

PrettyMuchBollocks · 16/10/2022 10:20

If you’re paying £8000 a month for your mortgage you can afford to hire someone to wait by the catflap to refuse entry to any mice (or you could get one of the smart catflaps that will block a cat from entering when it has something dodgy in its mouth).

Grin
FreddyHG · 16/10/2022 11:09

Well I agree with you. I don't want non native cats killing native wildlife either so I would lock it in.

AnnaMagnani · 16/10/2022 11:11

The cat is being a cat.

If you don't want the occasional mouse or shrew or bird or rabbit then don't have a cat.

Or have a cat that is content being indoors, which not all of them are.

Rosewaterblossom · 16/10/2022 11:32

FreddyHG · 16/10/2022 11:09

Well I agree with you. I don't want non native cats killing native wildlife either so I would lock it in.

You mean the native wildlife that also kill eachother. Or is it only ok if native wildlife kill eachother?

Oldraver · 16/10/2022 11:40