I can't figure out if I have body dysmorphia or if I actually look like Albert Steptoe.

[whoreditchshitestreet]

Being a 40 something woman & child of the 80s/90s I don’t spend too much time dwelling on my looks. I did, however, have a very quiet voice in my head that thought that once in a while, if the lighting was right & I squinted & maybe was a bit pissed, I might look like Natalie Portman’s less genetically blessed cousin. Albeit a bit more Picasso.

Then, why in god’s name, when yesterday I opened up some old zoom recordings taken over lock down did I see Albert Steptoe staring back at me? All gurn & schnoz & asymmetry.

My Natalie Portman illusion is now shattered & I now see that I should really be walking around with a paper bag on my head so as not to frighten children.

Does anyone else have two such wildly different opinions of one’s looks that both battle for top spot, so you’ve actually no idea whether you’re alright looking or a MONSTER?

PS My husband finds me attractive so that’s something but I’m now worried he has a very niche ‘Last of the Summer Wine’ kink.

Hahahaha, yes.
I either look like Brooke Shields or someone whose parents are related
But really, don’t rely on close up camera stills.
worst depiction possible.
I used to be very obsessed about what I looked like and how I ranked lookswise, but now I really like what I see in the mirror and don’t struggle romantically/attraction wise, so it’s all good

I look like Jilly Cooper would if she ate all the pies.

Ha! Yes, it's not really worth dwelling on is it because there will never be an answer. We'll never know which version is mostly closely aligned with how other people see us (please don't let it be Steptoe, please don't let it be Steptoe).

My dear old mum used to say she had the inverted version of body dysmorphia whereby she objectively knew she wasn't anywhere near model material but though she was gorgeous nonetheless. Good for her I say.

In real life mirrors I'm quite decent but photos make me look like Les Dawson doing Cissie and Ada, and have since I was about 20.

The person I look at in the mirror on a good day bears no resemblance to photos taken without warning. I don't even recognise the wild haired old woman in them and have concluded that there is a gremlin inside the camera hellbent on destroying what little self esteem I have.
For some reason, DP thinks I'm beautiful. Have decided I'll hang onto to him and perpetuate my delusions.

In my mind I’ve got the figure of a model. One look in the mirror shows I’m deranged !

I used to think I had a Nigella Lawson kinda look going on until Dd said I look like a lady on Masterchef and pointed at the TV. It was Lesley Joseph. Nothing against the lovely Lesley, but she could be my mother.

You are not alone, Ive no idea what i look like because the person in the mirror and the person in photos look nothing alike. They used to match up when I was slim but not anymore lol.

I look in the mirror and think “Oh, not too bad!”, then I look in the same mirror an hour later and think “Oh gawd, I look really awful!”. I never know which is true.

I have a form of body dysmorphia. I see myself as slimmer than I am and often completely forget I'm actually very fat. I also forget I'm old.

A very drunk person once told me I looked like Elizabeth Hurley and that idea has only gone away because my five year old has taken to stealing my phone and taking pictures of the 15 chins I was unaware of.
I’m sure you’re beautiful and magnificent really OP.

I do have the figure of a model

unfortunately it’s a Ford Cortina

@Smartstuffed I have this, in my head I’m a nice size 12 then will catch a glimpse of my double chin or back rolls

I really fancied myself with a lovely blonde choppy bob after years of long hair. Now I fear I look more like He-Man on a bad day.

Yes! I am sooo painfully un photo/video-genic. The transition to Teams meetings for everything has been horrible for me, it’s like every wrinkle, sag and asymmetry is highlighted and I find it so distracting and quite upsetting.

I’m really quite phobic about having my picture taken, any rare occasion when I have wanted to take a selfie I’ve taken 10 or so, had to delete them all and then given up.

I don’t feel that way when I look in the mirror necessarily, but I don’t know whether I actually am ugly and just never really realised it before or if it’s just that the camera hates me.

I had to have my photo taken yesterday for work. Popped into the loo to check teeth for spinach, thought I looked pretty good. Photographer does his thing, asks me which one I want to use - NONE OF THEM, why do I look like a squinty busty inbred??

I look exactly like Susan from Desperate Housewives. I've looked like her for years. Slim and glossy and flat tummy and gorgeous bouncy hair and expensive, well fitting jeans.

So long as I never look in a mirror.