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Reluctant to ask for a (deserved) promotion

11 replies

Halloweenshock · 13/10/2022 17:01

I wanted to ask for a promotion at work today, but I bottled it at the last minute and didn’t do it.

I meet all the criteria, definitely deserve it, I just have this attitude that it’s scrounging if I have to ask, that they ought to know that I deserve it and give it to me anyway, but that’s not really how it works in my company. You sort of have to put yourself forward, and I am not pushy / show-offy / confident / insert-better-word-here enough to do it.

This is why there is a gender pay gap isn’t it?

OP posts:
DarlingCoffee · 13/10/2022 17:05

You can do it! Try again tomorrow!

Halloweenshock · 13/10/2022 17:47

Thanks. I might have another try

OP posts:
mathsquestions · 13/10/2022 20:56

You must do it! Tomorrow!

manandbeast · 13/10/2022 21:01

you really need to change how you are approaching this!

in your company do you have a framework for what’s expected at certain levels, and do you have a plan to get you up to the next level? Are you collecting examples of how you are performing at the next level up?

Really these should be structured, ongoing conversations in which you are actually talking objectively about expectations and performance.

And it might be that you work in a company that’s not quite as structured.., but if so - the above is how I would frame it all.

good luck OP🤩

bigblueyonder · 13/10/2022 21:02

This is why there is a gender pay gap isn’t it?

Yes it is!!! I think it was Mary Portas on one of her tv shows years ago who said a woman would rather run naked through the streets than ask for a pay rise or promotion.

A man would embellish his achievements and borrow someone else's the moment he sniffed an opportunity for promotion.

PoundOfNesh · 13/10/2022 21:04


Your imaginary view isn’t how it works in any company. Although if you lack confidence to this degree do you have what they’re looking for. Most Snr roles require it.

Bintymcbintface · 13/10/2022 21:05

There's a gender pay gap because women traditionally go for lower paying roles, work less hours and take extended time away with mat leave etc. It's a myth that men get paid more for the same work

Quveas · 13/10/2022 21:08

Perhaps where you work you get given promotions because you deserve them and ask for them. Everywhere I have worked you have to apply for them, and compete for them.

Sparklfairy · 13/10/2022 21:10

I hate to say it but think like a man. No man I've ever met would have any of this angst, they'd just go for it.

DodgyLeftLeg · 13/10/2022 21:16

Yes, this is one reason why.

Another is you meet all the criteria. It’s well known men apply for roles and get them when they only meet say 50% of the criteria, so they get promoted faster. If you already meet all the criteria how is this a stretch promotion for you? I think you understand the point.

There is a very big difference between pushy, cocky, scrounging etc. and being assertively confident so that’s something you need to work on.

Go in there and get what you deserve. You also need a mentor - do you have one?

mathsquestions · 22/10/2022 21:33

Have you plucked up the courage?

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